haiku (huge coal barges)
The life of WV still rolling on the Ohio24 total reviews
Comment from ravenblack
Clever play on transfusing energy, the barges working the river, expending energy to bring energy. Arteries- I can't help but think of coal (carbon emissions) clogging them akin to cholesterol.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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Clever play on transfusing energy, the barges working the river, expending energy to bring energy. Arteries- I can't help but think of coal (carbon emissions) clogging them akin to cholesterol.
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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Took that POV because of the concerns for the Wv coal industry.
Comment from TAB_that's me
This is a great haiku about a river for the writing prompt. All rules have been followed. Good luck in the contest.
~Teresa~
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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This is a great haiku about a river for the writing prompt. All rules have been followed. Good luck in the contest.
~Teresa~
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
thank you for reviewing.
Comment from Val Crisson
I really like your take on this haiku contest. You actually name a river, which I think is important, and you also give it life by telling us what it does. The Ohio has been part of industry and trade for a very long time, and you really do it justice here.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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I really like your take on this haiku contest. You actually name a river, which I think is important, and you also give it life by telling us what it does. The Ohio has been part of industry and trade for a very long time, and you really do it justice here.
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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I work just 2 minutes away, and on a nice day, if I have time, spend my lunch break in a gazebo on our river front.
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Dear Dallas - this is a great submission. Loved your creativity in this one. Great choice of words to give impact. Good luck in the contest.
Thanks for sharing.
Maureen
huge coal barges
ply Ohio's arteries
transfusing energy
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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Dear Dallas - this is a great submission. Loved your creativity in this one. Great choice of words to give impact. Good luck in the contest.
Thanks for sharing.
Maureen
huge coal barges
ply Ohio's arteries
transfusing energy
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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Thanks, Maureen. I work just two minutes away from the river front.
Comment from Dean Kuch
As we live very close to the Ohio river, I see these massive behemoths all of the time, DALLAS. Chug-chugging their methodical ways through the waterways of the Old Ohio, creating massive wakes in the water to go jet-skiing and boating in.
Great haiku, with a solid message which adheres perfectly to the contest stipulations.
Well done!
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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As we live very close to the Ohio river, I see these massive behemoths all of the time, DALLAS. Chug-chugging their methodical ways through the waterways of the Old Ohio, creating massive wakes in the water to go jet-skiing and boating in.
Great haiku, with a solid message which adheres perfectly to the contest stipulations.
Well done!
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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I work 2 minutes from the banks. Spend some lunch time there.
Comment from Smoothiecool
good luck in the contest
your syllable count within contest format
good visual to portray message
flows well
cheers Smoothiecool
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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good luck in the contest
your syllable count within contest format
good visual to portray message
flows well
cheers Smoothiecool
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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Thanks for reviewing.
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welcome..SC
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
I think the coal barges are a very pertinent point to raise in your poem, Dallas. It is a very original take on this haiku competition and I wish you the best of luck, Giddy
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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I think the coal barges are a very pertinent point to raise in your poem, Dallas. It is a very original take on this haiku competition and I wish you the best of luck, Giddy
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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I work just two minutes away from the river front and often take my lunch break and sit in the gazebo and watch the barges. Very relaxing.
Comment from LIJ Red
After reading the lengthy prompt, then reading the poem, I am convinced that it indeed a haiku and meets the prompt requirements, and declare it to be excellent,in my opinion.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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After reading the lengthy prompt, then reading the poem, I am convinced that it indeed a haiku and meets the prompt requirements, and declare it to be excellent,in my opinion.
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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Thank you for reviewing.
Comment from GracieAnn
DALLAS, I Am partial to this River haiku writing prompt entry because of the area of the country you chose to write about. It has perfect syllable and line count, and uses a play on words in arteries to some degree. Well done. All the best in the contest! :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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DALLAS, I Am partial to this River haiku writing prompt entry because of the area of the country you chose to write about. It has perfect syllable and line count, and uses a play on words in arteries to some degree. Well done. All the best in the contest! :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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Me too. Work just 2 minutes away from our beautiful river front. Sometimes I sit in the gazebo on lunch break and just watch the barges. It is very relaxing.
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
This meets the criteria stated by the rules as to form and syllable count and uses sort of a rather subtle metaphor in "arteries" and "transfusion." Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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This meets the criteria stated by the rules as to form and syllable count and uses sort of a rather subtle metaphor in "arteries" and "transfusion." Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 24-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2014
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Thank you for reviewing.