Comment from ravenblack

Excellent

Okay- so you had some holiday grog, read some Shel Silverstein, and took in a Thanksgiving parade lol. This is great! Feast of Fandangle- are you sure you did not have Fanstory in mind? This and your poem where the girl transforms into a cell phone belong in a collection of kid's poems. Just tell the skullery maid to wash her hands. Excellent poem.

 Comment Written 05-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

No holiday for poor kiwis! We have to survive from our Labour Day (25th Oct) right through to Christmas without a day off (Awwwwww!) So this must have been motivated by triredness and lack of sleep to the point of hallucinations.

And just what are you suggesting about sweet little Hilda?!

Thanks for stopping by!

Steve

Comment from artisart4u

Exceptional

This is like reading a child's story again, all you need are pictures and a publisher.

Good luck with your this work of yours.

 Comment Written 05-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Thank you!

Yes, I would like to see this published. I kno exactly what I want in the way of illustrations, but alas I can't draw for nuts!

Steve

Comment from Wendyanne

Exceptional

Hi Steve this is a wonderful well written piece of poetry. Excellent rhythm and rhyme scheme and I enjoyed your story very much. Good luck.

 Comment Written 05-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Wendyanne, thanks so much for the great review and the six stars.

Steve

Comment from rjuselius

Excellent

haha. lol. priceless: "gobbledegooky fandangle parade"! this is a brilliant poem for children and adults a like. it gave me a laugh so i'm sure kids love it.
thank you for sharing dear steve!

rebekka x

 Comment Written 05-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Thanks, Rebekka - glad you enjoyed the Fandangle!

Steve

Comment from Selina Stambi

Exceptional

Prime Minister Pablo Portmanteau comes next,
Then General Dogsbody, purple and vexed ... such deliciously ridiculous names - love 'em!

Hello Steve,

I have such a weakness for your deliriously delightful Dr. Seuss-y poetry.

Here's my six, sir. I predict (still another) win!

Best wishes,

Sonali

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Thanks, Sonali.

These are certainly more fun to write than sombre old sonnets.

As for a win - I'm not sure this is hat the committee is looking for, but fingers crossed.

Steve

Comment from nomi338

Exceptional

This is one of the most fun to read out loud and listen to with my ears being tickled poems I have had the pleasure to review. I loved it!

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Thanks, Nomi - hope you've recovered from having your ears tickled by now! Appreciate the sixth star!

Steve

Comment from Kenneth Schaal

Excellent

A gorgeous read for eyes, and ears--all the senses are awakened more with each read. A bright new look into the old past. Best of luck. Kenny

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Thanks, kenny - glad you enjoyed.

Steve

Comment from Justin Chopin

Exceptional

Very innovative the rhyme and the flow and the rhythm of the piece reminded me of the " Night Before Christmas" the alliteration the descriptions of the festive Camelot celebrations were really well done. Very innovative .

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Thanks for the great review and the six shiny stars.

Yes, I believe it does have the same rhyme scheme and meter as 'The Night Before Christmas'

Steve

Comment from Just2Write

Excellent

Beautiful and fun write using classic Anapest meter, Steve. The whole poem is bouncy and tells a great story. Perfect for bedtime reading.

Loved the tumble off the tongue line:
there's a stirring, a stumble,
A wrangle, a rustle, a ripple, a rumble

Nice close, and now - Off to bed!

Thoroughly enjoyable Steve.

Rose.

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Thanks, Rose - glad you enjoyed.

That's one of my favourite lines too...

Steve

Comment from LIJ Red

Excellent

I reviewed this on the New Fanstory. It apparently didn't take.Alliteration Assonance, AABB, a right rollicking story in a poem.

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2014

---

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2014

Thank you.

Does that mean you are another pleased to be able to go back to Classic FanStory!?

Steve