Comment from Walu Feral

Excellent

G'day Steve. This is a really sweet write here mate. The flow and meter are perfect and the presetation is outstanding, as always. This is a great contest entry and in my opinion you are on a winner. Cheers and good luck, Fez

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2015

Thanks, Fez.

Steve

Comment from adewpearl

Excellent

excellent composition in the challenging rondeau redouble form
good use of anapestic meter to create a flowing cadence
effective use of imagery
soulful expression of romantic love
excellent entry in the Valentine contest - I still haven't a clue what I plan to write - you put me to shame
Brooke

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2015

Thanks, Brooke.

I know you will have come up with something to challenge or better this before Feb 14 I actually wrote this before I discovered that the contest existed - I'm not usually organised a month in advance!

Steve

Comment from Dorothy Farrell

Exceptional

Steve this is a beautiful Rondeau Redouble for the Valentine contest. Perfect in every respect and so good that I feel it is not worth me trying to enter a poem for this contest. I will be surprised if you do not win. Absolutely perfect - lovely picture. Warm regards Dorothy x

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2015

Dorothy - thanks so much for the kind words and the six stars.

Don't let me put you off - I haven't won one of these contests for ages and I've learned never to try to read the judges' minds!

Steve

Comment from nancyjam

Exceptional

This form looks pretty near impossible but you have conquered it for sure with this entry in the Valentines contest.
The lines are beautifully composed to blend together nicely and proclaim a very special love.
I wish you the best in the contest. Nancy

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2015

Thanks, Nancy.

The most challenging thing I find with this form is the need for so many multiple rhymes with the same sound...

Steve

Comment from emrpoems

Excellent

You're a hand full of trumps to the King and the Ace -
A winner, whatever the game or the deal.
You're the sky-high soprano to my booming bass.
In the great ship of life you're both rudder and keel.
Shall I sing you a song?

These last lines steal the cake
Congrats go to you for the execution of this complex form
Superb presentation
All the best in the contest

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2015

Oh, you mean those lines where I was absolutely stuck for how I was going to squeeze in two more 'aces' and two more 'eels'!

Thanks for the great review.

Steve

Comment from Lovinia

Exceptional

Hi Steve

I guess every reader has fallen in love with this one ... and wouldn't we gals love to have it written just for us? :))

Just reading your notes exhausted me ... WOW! I don't think I could write a single Rondeau. A rondeau redouble .... OMG! At least reading it isn't exhausting.

It may be just me and my non-metrical ear but I find these lines out of kilter. I've read a few times, and still stumble at "My happiness". Amazing only two rhymes for such a long poem ... this must have taken ages and such hard work.

I think your poem an excellent entry for the Valentine's Poetry and wish you the best of luck my friend. I love the title and the concept. Well done. Hugs - Lovi xoxox

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2015

Reaching deep through the murk to find the romantic inside!

By far the toughest thing about these is getting the multiple rhymes on each of the two endings to be meaningful. I had a few rhymes to spare, but it's a bit difficult to work 'carapace' or 'conger eel' into a romantic poem!

Thanks for the great review and the six stars.

Steve

Comment from mshirachot

Excellent

This style makes for a delightful romantic type poem. Gushy words are just meant to be repeated-in double time! LOL

You need to fix the bloopers in your author's notes: The rondeau redoubl�????�???�??�?�© <--- I hate that about this site.

Strong entry for the contest. Best wishes for that.
Blessings to you,
Marsha

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2015

Thanks, Marsha.

The weird thing about the odd characters in the notes is that I didn't do anything to make them appear.

I know how to add accented characters and I know that there SHOULD be an e-acute at the end of redouble, but I didn't bother to put it there, so something strange happened when this was posted. C'est la vie! There - no accents in that!

Steve

reply by mshirachot on 12-Jan-2015

Steve - for some reason the editor software for this site cannot accept ellipses or quotation marks in the author's notes section. There are ways you can disable that issue, but it is a lengthy process. I always go back and review not just my poem but my notes multiple times before posting to try try try to avoid those popping up.
Blessings,
Marsha

Comment from rosehill (Wendy)

Exceptional

We are going to have to curb this mutual fan club we have going, but you can sing one of your poems across the miles at any time. The tone of the Rondeau Redouble, both intimate, yet with a bounce in its heart - allowed me, without guilt, to stand in the doorway and watch you gaze at your love. The flow into the repeated lines was never forced and each stanza, day, night, dreaming, awake, told of the treasure you mention and the luck you feel to be so happy. Well, well done and I hope that SWMBO appreciates your appreciation when when she reads and re-reads this tribute. - Wendy

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2015

I'm happy to keep awarding you six stars as long as the poetry deserves it (almost always) and as long as the sixes hold out. I have to keep one or two in reserve for my other mutual fan clubber, hunpwhistle...

SWMBO hasn't actually seen or heard this one yet - I fear she might recognise that romantic licence has ventured far into downright fiction!

Very happy to have your opinion that it works.

Steve

reply by rosehill (Wendy) on 12-Jan-2015

Fiction, OK, so ribbons and lace are actually flannel and bright yellow happy-face socks. Your imagination still soars and she will adore this piece.- Wendy

Comment from Louise Michelle

Excellent

Hi Steve,

You did a splendid job and it's easy to see a lot of effort went into your work. Each rhyme is well chosen and I loved the metaphors. That fourth stanza is amazing -- you crafted that so well.

Hugs,
Lou

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Jan-2015

Thanks, Lou - glad you enjoyed.

Steve

Comment from nancy_e_davis

Excellent

Happy Valentines day! I can see you worked hard on this poem and it is very well done Steve. I love the first stanza it really draws a person in. Well done my friend. :<) Nancy

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Jan-2015

Thanks, Nancy.

Yes, there was a bit of work involved putting this one together.

Steve