A Painted Face
a final show55 total reviews
Comment from tfawcus
The strength of your rhyme and rhythm carries this poem forward towards its 'coup de gras' in the final line. You build up to the sense of despair relentlessly line by line, leading us to the suicidal thought at the end.
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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The strength of your rhyme and rhythm carries this poem forward towards its 'coup de gras' in the final line. You build up to the sense of despair relentlessly line by line, leading us to the suicidal thought at the end.
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Many thanks for this insightful and deep review. I very much appreciate it.
Comment from Megalips
Tears of a clown...the rhyme and cadence work well. The speaker limits the information such that this may be largely metaphorical, and the reader has to wonder on the actual circumstance...but that's the point of ambiguity...so many possible interpretations. Well written and curious all together.
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Tears of a clown...the rhyme and cadence work well. The speaker limits the information such that this may be largely metaphorical, and the reader has to wonder on the actual circumstance...but that's the point of ambiguity...so many possible interpretations. Well written and curious all together.
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Many thanks for your thoughts on this one. Much appreciated.
Comment from The Sleeping Tiger
Beautiful poem,
I feel the person's pain and sadness
I love how you referred to it as a 'painted face' and the image fits perfectly
Well done.
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Beautiful poem,
I feel the person's pain and sadness
I love how you referred to it as a 'painted face' and the image fits perfectly
Well done.
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Many thanks for reading sharing your thoughts. Much appreciated.
Comment from mermaids
Love your use of rhyming words, glint, splint, step and prep all add to the smooth flow of the poem. A feeling of sadness comes through your words, the lonely clown at the end of the road.
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Love your use of rhyming words, glint, splint, step and prep all add to the smooth flow of the poem. A feeling of sadness comes through your words, the lonely clown at the end of the road.
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Many thanks for the review on this one. All the best.
Comment from angel123
I enjoyed reading your poem. It flows and rhymes well and it is well written. I really like your second paragraph. Best wishes!
Angel123
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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I enjoyed reading your poem. It flows and rhymes well and it is well written. I really like your second paragraph. Best wishes!
Angel123
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Many thanks for sharing your ideas and thoughts about the piece. It is very much appreciated.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello giraffmang
I like how you use rhyming words to tell a dark story of someone who can not envision or paint a better future.
Gert
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Hello giraffmang
I like how you use rhyming words to tell a dark story of someone who can not envision or paint a better future.
Gert
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 29-May-2015
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Many thanks for your thoughts on this poem. I appreciate it.
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you are welcome
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Smiles
Comment from Axiom Gray
This is a tragic poem. I feel like I'm reading about a Hollywood star who has succumbed to the price of fame. I could really feel the hopelessness and sorrow in the poem. Well done!
reply by the author on 28-May-2015
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This is a tragic poem. I feel like I'm reading about a Hollywood star who has succumbed to the price of fame. I could really feel the hopelessness and sorrow in the poem. Well done!
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 28-May-2015
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Many thanks for the great review. It is very much appreciated.
Comment from Larissa B
Dark poetry, well written and very fitting words to describe despair. Not only losing hope but also losing the desire to try finding it. Hah! Great stuff.
Good luck with the contest.
Larissa
reply by the author on 28-May-2015
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Dark poetry, well written and very fitting words to describe despair. Not only losing hope but also losing the desire to try finding it. Hah! Great stuff.
Good luck with the contest.
Larissa
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 28-May-2015
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Many thanks for your thoughts on this. It is very much appreciated.
Comment from patcelaw
Our life is like a show. Some of us look forward to the final curtain, and others want to have more time. I am ready for the final curtain, but feel God has a purpose for my life and I want to live as long as he has a purpose for my feeble body and brain. Patricia
reply by the author on 28-May-2015
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Our life is like a show. Some of us look forward to the final curtain, and others want to have more time. I am ready for the final curtain, but feel God has a purpose for my life and I want to live as long as he has a purpose for my feeble body and brain. Patricia
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 28-May-2015
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Hi Patricia, I am sure he does and part of that seems to be sharing your testimony. Many thanks for your insightful review of the piece. It is very much appreciated.
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Thanks for your thoughts.
Comment from robina1978
An absolutely excellent poem, and worthy entrance for the prompt. You write much about sadness, no love and so on. It rhymes all the way. And at the end you write: who says that 'The show must go on'?
reply by the author on 28-May-2015
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An absolutely excellent poem, and worthy entrance for the prompt. You write much about sadness, no love and so on. It rhymes all the way. And at the end you write: who says that 'The show must go on'?
Comment Written 28-May-2015
reply by the author on 28-May-2015
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Many, many thanks for this encouraging review.