2015 Haiku
Viewing comments for Chapter 28 "haiku (frozen little hands)"A collection of haiku I wrote in 2015
23 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This winter haiku, Frozen Little Hands, fits right into the coming season when kids will be out battling in the cold, while battling the cold.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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This winter haiku, Frozen Little Hands, fits right into the coming season when kids will be out battling in the cold, while battling the cold.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much for the awesome review. :)
Comment from rjuselius
This is a fine social commentary dear anonymous! The imagery reflects well on the satori. Very well presented my friend!
Thank you for sharing!
Good luck!
Blessings!
Rebekka x
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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This is a fine social commentary dear anonymous! The imagery reflects well on the satori. Very well presented my friend!
Thank you for sharing!
Good luck!
Blessings!
Rebekka x
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you for the awesome review :)
Comment from Louise Michelle
What a terrific image you chose and your poem compliments it so nicely. Little hands as well as big ones can get frozen on a cold, wintry day. Hugs, Lou
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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What a terrific image you chose and your poem compliments it so nicely. Little hands as well as big ones can get frozen on a cold, wintry day. Hugs, Lou
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you for the awesome review :)
Comment from Dean Kuch
Good photo to accentuate the message in your haiku-winter contest entry, Anonymous Poet. The 5-7-4 and sixteen syllabic count is well within haiku limitations. All of the other rules of the contest seem to have been adhered to perfectly as well.
Good luck to you in the booths.
~Dean
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Good photo to accentuate the message in your haiku-winter contest entry, Anonymous Poet. The 5-7-4 and sixteen syllabic count is well within haiku limitations. All of the other rules of the contest seem to have been adhered to perfectly as well.
Good luck to you in the booths.
~Dean
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you Handsome :) for the awesome review :)
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It's always a pleasure, darlin'
~Dean ;)
Comment from Zue65
Yes, that's the aftermath of any war, it will cause havoc not only to the warring camps but more so the innocent civilians especially the children who are the unwilling victims of the war. Children who should be studying are displaced unnecessarily and education takes a backseat in exchange for safety. This is an excellent haiku.God bless.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Yes, that's the aftermath of any war, it will cause havoc not only to the warring camps but more so the innocent civilians especially the children who are the unwilling victims of the war. Children who should be studying are displaced unnecessarily and education takes a backseat in exchange for safety. This is an excellent haiku.God bless.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you for the awesome review :)
Comment from Ben Colder
War is hell, some say. It is the children who always pays the cost. Your poem is the moment and plagues the mind with wonder. Good contest piece.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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War is hell, some say. It is the children who always pays the cost. Your poem is the moment and plagues the mind with wonder. Good contest piece.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you for the awesome review :)
Comment from Curly Girly
This is a clever little haiku verse. It has a good play on words and appears to meet all the criteria for the contest. Best wishes!
frozen little hands
over golden red bonfire
coldblooded war
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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This is a clever little haiku verse. It has a good play on words and appears to meet all the criteria for the contest. Best wishes!
frozen little hands
over golden red bonfire
coldblooded war
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you for the awesome review :)
Comment from Pyrrho
Thanks for the "non-author's-note" I forgot the requirements of the classic Japanese form and you explained it succinctly, or the site did and you quoted it.
I have a bit of a problem relating the satori to the body of you poem because of the word "war". But I do enjoy the poem overall. I wish the site would stop encouraging illustrations. I like to create my own visuals and they rob me of that pleasure.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thanks for the "non-author's-note" I forgot the requirements of the classic Japanese form and you explained it succinctly, or the site did and you quoted it.
I have a bit of a problem relating the satori to the body of you poem because of the word "war". But I do enjoy the poem overall. I wish the site would stop encouraging illustrations. I like to create my own visuals and they rob me of that pleasure.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you for the awesome review :)
Comment from alvina224224
Excellent haiku, author, and one that is so relevant to the world today. I also like the art work you have chosen to compliment it. I noticed this is a contest entry, and consider this a winner. Best of luck
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Excellent haiku, author, and one that is so relevant to the world today. I also like the art work you have chosen to compliment it. I noticed this is a contest entry, and consider this a winner. Best of luck
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you for the awesome review :)
Comment from Sambangi
haha....excellent aha in coldblooded war.I'm not an expert of haiku, but what ever little I know, first two lines shall give a concrete imagery and third mostly human experience. I think the words in second line "to stay worm" are more of a human experience....that is inference from the earlier part.
I feel it will be much better, if you describe the cold and/or fire in first two lines in full and put human experience only in third line. Otherwise, this short poem is quite good. I'm not trying to force my opinion, but I would have done that if I'm in your place.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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haha....excellent aha in coldblooded war.I'm not an expert of haiku, but what ever little I know, first two lines shall give a concrete imagery and third mostly human experience. I think the words in second line "to stay worm" are more of a human experience....that is inference from the earlier part.
I feel it will be much better, if you describe the cold and/or fire in first two lines in full and put human experience only in third line. Otherwise, this short poem is quite good. I'm not trying to force my opinion, but I would have done that if I'm in your place.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thank you Sambang, I will consider your feedback. Thank you for the great review.