Heart Cafted Poems - 2020
Viewing comments for Chapter 64 "Resting place"Musings of an old man -2020
35 total reviews
Comment from Mastery
Hi Jim. Excellent poem here from first line to last. You want to see big change go by your old high school some day and take a look.
I liked these lines best, my friend. Such wonderful writing:
"The tree has grown thicker, taller.
Its canopy shading yonder resting
souls, with shadows dancing on
the breeze that helps cool the air"
Deservig of six stars, but I have none left. Sorry. Bob
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
Hi Jim. Excellent poem here from first line to last. You want to see big change go by your old high school some day and take a look.
I liked these lines best, my friend. Such wonderful writing:
"The tree has grown thicker, taller.
Its canopy shading yonder resting
souls, with shadows dancing on
the breeze that helps cool the air"
Deservig of six stars, but I have none left. Sorry. Bob
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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Ahh my good friend, words cannot clearly describe the feeling of freedom being once again behind the desk and able to write.
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Great! Bob
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Great! Bob
Comment from Rx kingpen
My my my. Haven't read anything like this before. A little ominous, haunting, profoundly sad. But honest. Hard to coin bleak when it's the counterpart to life.
A very good chilling write
I'd use breeze not breezes. Cheers
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
My my my. Haven't read anything like this before. A little ominous, haunting, profoundly sad. But honest. Hard to coin bleak when it's the counterpart to life.
A very good chilling write
I'd use breeze not breezes. Cheers
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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Thank you, I appreciate the thought. I choose the plural because the motion of air movement comes from within and without, ergo the wheezing as in a breath and the breeze on the air.
Comment from amada
"...the blades of grass far from appearing..." A beautiful remembrance poem that took me away into my own remembrances, oh those hallowed grounds. I enjoy the theme, alliteration, and softness of this work.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
"...the blades of grass far from appearing..." A beautiful remembrance poem that took me away into my own remembrances, oh those hallowed grounds. I enjoy the theme, alliteration, and softness of this work.
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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amada, I am so grateful for the time you took to read and comment on this free verse challenge. Thank you!
Comment from Bill Schott
This poignant reflection finds me there at the graveside as well. Parents, brothers, a sister, all resting and awaiting the call to rise to heaven and join the multitude when the end has come.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
This poignant reflection finds me there at the graveside as well. Parents, brothers, a sister, all resting and awaiting the call to rise to heaven and join the multitude when the end has come.
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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Bill, yes you are so correct. I am very grateful for the six-star validation kind sir!
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
Changes happen everywhere. Even in the hallowed grounds of a cemetery.
Ten years would make quite a difference in the scenery but as you say your heart still feels the same as before, ten years after. Nicely done.
Ralf
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
Changes happen everywhere. Even in the hallowed grounds of a cemetery.
Ten years would make quite a difference in the scenery but as you say your heart still feels the same as before, ten years after. Nicely done.
Ralf
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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Ralf, as always, I am so grateful for the time you took to read and comment on this free verse challenge. Thank you!
Comment from Mary Vigasin
Beautifully written poem with sentiment of loss and memories looking at the past, present and the expected future.
There is sadness here yet a comfort in standing in a comfortable and familiar setting.
Mary
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
Beautifully written poem with sentiment of loss and memories looking at the past, present and the expected future.
There is sadness here yet a comfort in standing in a comfortable and familiar setting.
Mary
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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Mary, I am so grateful for the time you took to read and comment on this free verse challenge. Thank you!
Comment from zanya
A poem that does what poetry does best -evokes sentiment and emotion - an emotion- filled return to the cemetery stirring significant memories of a loved one & passage of time
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
A poem that does what poetry does best -evokes sentiment and emotion - an emotion- filled return to the cemetery stirring significant memories of a loved one & passage of time
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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zanya, your kind words are so validating, I thank you very much!
Comment from Vanna1
You followed the criteria well. I can sense time lapse. This poem is peaceful not actually sad, which it surprising for your theme, so well done there. Good presentation as well.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
You followed the criteria well. I can sense time lapse. This poem is peaceful not actually sad, which it surprising for your theme, so well done there. Good presentation as well.
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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Vanna, I am so grateful for the time you took to read and comment on this free verse challenge. Thank you!
Comment from Seshadri_Sreenivasan
I was quite touched reading this well-written poem about the past and the feeling of loss and emptiness. Thank you for sharing!
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
I was quite touched reading this well-written poem about the past and the feeling of loss and emptiness. Thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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Seshardi, I am so grateful for your kind words, thank you!
Comment from TommyWrites
This is really beautiful. It's deep, and very moving along with thought provoking. In a way, you tell a story in your poem, and I really enjoyed it.
You did a very good job on the before and after. Your poem is sad in a way, but at the same time it's not because there is this certain peace to it.
This is an excellent poem, thank you for sharing!
TommyWrites~
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
This is really beautiful. It's deep, and very moving along with thought provoking. In a way, you tell a story in your poem, and I really enjoyed it.
You did a very good job on the before and after. Your poem is sad in a way, but at the same time it's not because there is this certain peace to it.
This is an excellent poem, thank you for sharing!
TommyWrites~
Comment Written 18-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
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TommyWrites, as always, I am so grateful for the time you took to read and comment on this free verse challenge. Thank you!