Reviews from

Chronicles of the Wandering Man

Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Black Moon Glinting"
An extended story in poem form

89 total reviews 
Comment from IanC
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I enjoyed reading your piece indeed.

I really liked this line "We watched eternal starless night as if to seek a way, and then that moon winked down at us, black glinting light at play." For some reason spell check said "starless" is not spelled correctly and when i looked it up in the dictionary it was not even in the book, just and oddity to mention. I believe "starless" is a word personally just wanted to mention it.

I think you might have a spelling error? In this passage...."dead people in a dying land
have nowt to keep them strong." Did you intend to write "nowt"? ....Ian

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 04-May-2010
    Thanks Ian :-). I suspect starless should be hyphenated (star-less), but I think everyone knows what it means. Nowt is an English form of Naught, but it's not hopped across to your side of the pond, methinks, because loads of reviewers have questioned it.

    I'm so glad you enjoyed the read!

    Mike
Comment from Frank Fathom
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I found no flaws with this work. It is a well written piece showing great creativity and imagination. The writers skills displayed like a fine jewel in the front of a jewelry case! I give it five stars. FF

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 04-May-2010
    Thank you, Frank; what a wonderful thing to say :-)

    Mike
Comment from bhogg
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I indeed did enjoy this read. It's poetry, but it really is a grand story as well. Old wandering man isn't perfect, but he does seem to have a pragmatic heart.

Despite their vicious, sick intent,
I didn't own the blame
to hate these creatures, pitiful.
All victims. All the same


 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 04-May-2010
    Thank you, bhogg :-). Yeah, he does what he can with the cards his depressing life deals him. Interlude next, and then more very soon!

    Mike
Comment from christopherjl
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is very well written. I have no suggestions for you at this time but I wish you luck with your writing. Excellent job. Regards, Christopher.

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 04-May-2010
    Thank you, CHristopher, for a wonderful review :-)

    Mike
Comment from MyYiaYia
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I am certainly enjoying the read. It is one of the most excellent poems I have read. Since I am not totally familiar with poetry, I can only say as to what I like, and I do, to how it flows, and it does nicely, and whether there are any spelling errors, I found none.
-have nowt to keep them strong. - are you saying 'naught' or does it mean 'nothing', I am not sure I have seen this word before.

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 03-May-2010
    Thankyou, MyYiaYia :-). I'm far more interested in what you thought of my poem than whether you think it was technically apt, so you go right on telling me about flow and whether you like it. That's what I want to know :-)

    Nowt is just an English form of Naught, and means the same hing.

    Thank you so much for the lovely review :-)

    Mike
reply by MyYiaYia on 04-May-2010
    Thanks for the definition. I was watching 'All Creatures Great and Small' the other night and actually heard the word being used. It really put the meaning to it for me. I will definitely continue to review. Deb
Comment from geraldine
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this and would look forward to the complete work once finished. I can picture the world the characters inhabit. The only part l struggled with was 'was by it's hangman I had to read it a couple of times and it still doesn't quite say for me what l think you intend to convey.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 03-May-2010
    Thank you, Geraldine :-). That line is a case of inverted grammar, which I usually avoid but it had the right feel for me in this case. I'm so glad you enjoyed the read :-)

    Mike
Comment from AnnaLinda
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

O.K. I will get my 1.18 for this.
I think that perhaps you should write
a script for a movie or something and
leave the poetry alone.

Linda

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 03-May-2010
    Enjoy your 1.18, Linda :-)

    Mike
reply by AnnaLinda on 03-May-2010
    Thanks Mike!
Comment from Valkarie
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I like this because...you keep the suspense at top knotch for the reader,which is impeccable and at times chilling.
A powerful piece with a visual and intriguing description of your wandering man. Artistic and creative write, waiting for the next part.
Valkarie...

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 03-May-2010
    Thank you, Valkarie. I'll be getting on with it shortly. So glad you're continuing to enjoy my saga.

    Mike
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I'm enjoying The Wandering
Man -- the content, the flow
to the words, rhythm and rhyme,
all excellent... the story
developing well -- looking
forward to the next chapter.
I'll look out for it.
Well penned, Mike.

MArgaret

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 03-May-2010
    Thank you, Margaret; I really appreciate it :-). One reviewer with a very misleading name has told me to leave poetry alone and wrie screenplays or something. Against that, it's heartening to get good reviews from those I greatly respect, such as yourself.

    Mike
Comment from Donna Thompson
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

very nice.. a little difficult to read on the eyes with the white text and black background. but once my eyes adjusted, it was a very interesting piece.. great job overall

 Comment Written 03-May-2010


reply by the author on 03-May-2010
    Thank you, Donna :-). I hadn't thought about the colours being difficult; I'm glad it didn't put you off.

    Mike