Lonely Hearts Meet
Viewing comments for Chapter 61 "part four, Chapter 18"Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.
65 total reviews
Comment from whispersofthesoul
hiya,
this a fantastic continuation, the tension you are creating is wonderful and entriguig leaving you wanting more. the action and dialogue is spot on with more attention placed on the dialogue
i really enjoyed reading this good chapter
welldone
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
  |
hiya,
this a fantastic continuation, the tension you are creating is wonderful and entriguig leaving you wanting more. the action and dialogue is spot on with more attention placed on the dialogue
i really enjoyed reading this good chapter
welldone
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from elgone
This is an outstanding continuation of the chapter. The drama is compelling and the tension increasing. The situation and the dialogue are very realistic. Unfortunately, this happens in real life too often and is easy to envision.
e
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
 |
This is an outstanding continuation of the chapter. The drama is compelling and the tension increasing. The situation and the dialogue are very realistic. Unfortunately, this happens in real life too often and is easy to envision.
e
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review and you insight.
Comment from Anisa-
Very tense chapter here. Hoping Anna makes it out okay. Just one question ... When the officer is speaking through the loud speaker I get how the people in the apartment can hear him, but how are the police hearing the responses of the people in the apartment?
Anisa
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
|
Very tense chapter here. Hoping Anna makes it out okay. Just one question ... When the officer is speaking through the loud speaker I get how the people in the apartment can hear him, but how are the police hearing the responses of the people in the apartment?
Anisa
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review. They placed a microphone through the bathroom window and George has the receiver.
Comment from CALLAHANMR
Hi Barbara:)
Bobby is so enraged that all judgment is gone. He is in a manic state probably fueled by alcohol or drugs. I know this won't end well. With a SWAT team on the way Bobby has no easy out. Even if he surrenders now, he will likely spend many years in prison. Most likely, he will be killed by the SWAT team.
If the police act quickly, Anna should recover, but her injuries are severe. With Bobby and his friends out of the way, she should finally be able to put most of her fears to rest. Best of all she has the support of Troy and his family.
So, I predict a terrible, but deserved, outcome for Bobby and a Good outcome for Anna after a few weeks to heal.
Love and Irish Hugs for powerful writing.
Roger
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
|
Hi Barbara:)
Bobby is so enraged that all judgment is gone. He is in a manic state probably fueled by alcohol or drugs. I know this won't end well. With a SWAT team on the way Bobby has no easy out. Even if he surrenders now, he will likely spend many years in prison. Most likely, he will be killed by the SWAT team.
If the police act quickly, Anna should recover, but her injuries are severe. With Bobby and his friends out of the way, she should finally be able to put most of her fears to rest. Best of all she has the support of Troy and his family.
So, I predict a terrible, but deserved, outcome for Bobby and a Good outcome for Anna after a few weeks to heal.
Love and Irish Hugs for powerful writing.
Roger
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review and your continued support..
Comment from HPicasso
Another good chapter.
The action moves along well.
Excellent dialogue that conveys the intense emotions of characters on both sides of this situation.
A great writing this chapter where the negotiators got take a look at Anna. Poor Anna. I hope she can survive through all this. The tension is on high alert. Well done!
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
|
Another good chapter.
The action moves along well.
Excellent dialogue that conveys the intense emotions of characters on both sides of this situation.
A great writing this chapter where the negotiators got take a look at Anna. Poor Anna. I hope she can survive through all this. The tension is on high alert. Well done!
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Oh boy, heart pounding as I'm reading.
Great post Barbara, you have penned this perfectly. It holds all I would think such a situation would have.
Only saw one little edit. Otherwise perfect reading.
Imagery is strong, and the emotion within the post is elevated and it works well.
Thanks for sharing.
Maureen
Edit Check:
"Thanks, the name's George. Do ( have you) any other suggestions?" he asked as ...// you have
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
|
Oh boy, heart pounding as I'm reading.
Great post Barbara, you have penned this perfectly. It holds all I would think such a situation would have.
Only saw one little edit. Otherwise perfect reading.
Imagery is strong, and the emotion within the post is elevated and it works well.
Thanks for sharing.
Maureen
Edit Check:
"Thanks, the name's George. Do ( have you) any other suggestions?" he asked as ...// you have
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review. Thank you for catching that. I can't believe I did it.
-
No worries my friend, I never catch my own spag either:)
Hope you had a great Easter.
Hugs
Maureen
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
You handled this really well, Barbara,
clearly showing the scene to your
readers, and just how dangerously brutal
Bobby is. Poor Anna.
Do have you any other suggestions
Do you have....
Margaret
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
|
You handled this really well, Barbara,
clearly showing the scene to your
readers, and just how dangerously brutal
Bobby is. Poor Anna.
Do have you any other suggestions
Do you have....
Margaret
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review. I have made that correction.
Comment from Carolyn Hilliard
I don't know how the others feel, but Bobby angers me. He's a garbage mouthed brute. I'm looking forward to him getting
what he deserves; don't care if he is a sick in the mind and heart; rabid dogs get shot, he deserves no less.
Could be wrong, but believe the sentence below need [in] in it.
The negotiator turned [in] his direction.
The center quotation mark needs to be removed.
"I need the SWAT team." This is going downhill."
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
|
I don't know how the others feel, but Bobby angers me. He's a garbage mouthed brute. I'm looking forward to him getting
what he deserves; don't care if he is a sick in the mind and heart; rabid dogs get shot, he deserves no less.
Could be wrong, but believe the sentence below need [in] in it.
The negotiator turned [in] his direction.
The center quotation mark needs to be removed.
"I need the SWAT team." This is going downhill."
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
I am not sure how the " got there. It's not in my orginal manuscript. Oh well, it's gone now. Thank you for catching it.
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Barbara,
I held my breath as I read this chapter. I am so afraid that Bobby will kill Anna. He is insane and no telling what he will do. I'm glad Michael is safe for now. Poor Anna she has been beaten so bad but most of all she fears for Michael.You have written this scary chapter with the skill of a good story teller. Well done....blessings, chey
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
|
Hi Barbara,
I held my breath as I read this chapter. I am so afraid that Bobby will kill Anna. He is insane and no telling what he will do. I'm glad Michael is safe for now. Poor Anna she has been beaten so bad but most of all she fears for Michael.You have written this scary chapter with the skill of a good story teller. Well done....blessings, chey
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Chris Tee
Barbara you have me in suspense once more girl. I hope they hit the shit out of Bobby before they kill the bastard, because that is what he deserves. Well done with this part.
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
|
Barbara you have me in suspense once more girl. I hope they hit the shit out of Bobby before they kill the bastard, because that is what he deserves. Well done with this part.
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review.