Along the Jericho Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 48 "Wiyaphe Moon"Murder Mystery
49 total reviews
Comment from JW
In reading this well written chapter, I could not help but feel how appropriate it is too be reading something like this just days before Halloween. It fits quite well with the holiday.
Thanks for sharing this. JW
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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In reading this well written chapter, I could not help but feel how appropriate it is too be reading something like this just days before Halloween. It fits quite well with the holiday.
Thanks for sharing this. JW
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Hi, Jonathon. Yes, saved by Halloween! I've been traveling and just hadn't gotten time to sit down and write. Turns out the timing seems to have been perfect.
As always, I appreciate your support and generosity.
Warm regards, Bev
Comment from pickthorn
A very scary and suspenseful chapter. A use of exorcism by Brian has kept the evil spirit in check for the moment but the demons have not been defeated. Excellent storyline and dialogue. Great story.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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A very scary and suspenseful chapter. A use of exorcism by Brian has kept the evil spirit in check for the moment but the demons have not been defeated. Excellent storyline and dialogue. Great story.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you so very much, P. I apprecate your wonderfully encouraging review. :0) Bev
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Holy mother Bev, so bloody glad I didn't read this last night.
Ok creepy, scaring me senseless....it holds great power even as I read it. Frightening really and I'm not so sure I would have been able to face it as Brian did.
Excellent writing my friend - thanks for sharing and scaring the life out of me.
Maureen
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Holy mother Bev, so bloody glad I didn't read this last night.
Ok creepy, scaring me senseless....it holds great power even as I read it. Frightening really and I'm not so sure I would have been able to face it as Brian did.
Excellent writing my friend - thanks for sharing and scaring the life out of me.
Maureen
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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You're welcome, I think LOL. Seriously, you've been with me from the beginning, Maureen, and I do so appreciate your support and encouragement. Big Hug, Bev
Comment from Curtis Hatch
Bev,
The chapter held my attention as Brian interacted with the demons, or unclean spirits, upstairs. It is rich with action, suspense, and mystery. Alyx was an important player in the plot, seeing the danger Brian could not see, including the statue of the Virgin Mary being thrown at his head. It appears that the Exorcism has worked, for the moment, but what will the future hold.
When Brian assumed (pastor ship)[pastorship] of St. Matilde's, he chose not to occupy the room of the man he replaced, despite the fact that it was spacious with a large private bath.***consider replacing 'despite the fact that' with 'although.' Those who die by their own hand become mine, Priest. Attack me and you attack her.***remove extra spacing between 'me and and' to pull the paragraph together.
I enjoyed the read.
Curtis
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Bev,
The chapter held my attention as Brian interacted with the demons, or unclean spirits, upstairs. It is rich with action, suspense, and mystery. Alyx was an important player in the plot, seeing the danger Brian could not see, including the statue of the Virgin Mary being thrown at his head. It appears that the Exorcism has worked, for the moment, but what will the future hold.
When Brian assumed (pastor ship)[pastorship] of St. Matilde's, he chose not to occupy the room of the man he replaced, despite the fact that it was spacious with a large private bath.***consider replacing 'despite the fact that' with 'although.' Those who die by their own hand become mine, Priest. Attack me and you attack her.***remove extra spacing between 'me and and' to pull the paragraph together.
I enjoyed the read.
Curtis
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Hi, Curtis. Thank you for the great review and suggestions. Most helpful and much appreciated. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from InterestingRon
Hi Bev,
Hey! I remember this gripping tale. Wonderfully drawn characters in a religious environment replete with supernatural happenings.
Is this rewrite? Or an entirely new version?
I'm gonna enjoy this work.
Hope you are well, my dear friend.
Ron xox
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Hi Bev,
Hey! I remember this gripping tale. Wonderfully drawn characters in a religious environment replete with supernatural happenings.
Is this rewrite? Or an entirely new version?
I'm gonna enjoy this work.
Hope you are well, my dear friend.
Ron xox
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thanks so much, Ron. Can you believe I'm still plugging away at the Original!! LOL. Thanks for the great review and your six-star generosity. Means a lot that you enjoyed the read. Hugs, Bev
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Poor Brean - what torment, but he
finds comfort in Aylx's presence
Attack me
and you attack her. - close this up, Bev
this together(,) won't we, boy
I find this so creepy....
Margaret
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Poor Brean - what torment, but he
finds comfort in Aylx's presence
Attack me
and you attack her. - close this up, Bev
this together(,) won't we, boy
I find this so creepy....
Margaret
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Margaret, thank you so much for your generous and encouraging review. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from rtobaygo
Excellent conflict as well as scene setup. The description's of various interactions between good and evil are spot on!
On a more personal note: I'm glad you are posting again as I enjoy your style.
Take care,
Ray
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Excellent conflict as well as scene setup. The description's of various interactions between good and evil are spot on!
On a more personal note: I'm glad you are posting again as I enjoy your style.
Take care,
Ray
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Ray, thank you for wonderfully generous review and encouragement. Means a lot to me! Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from robina1978
I understand now why this chapter was selected to vote for. It is one of your best so far. Father Brian is terrified as evil tries to get a hold of him. But he used his Crucifix to hold it off.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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I understand now why this chapter was selected to vote for. It is one of your best so far. Father Brian is terrified as evil tries to get a hold of him. But he used his Crucifix to hold it off.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Hello, Ine. thank you so much for taking time out to read my chapter. I really appreciate your support and encouragement. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from Norbanus
This segment is down right scary. I can almost smell the brimstone smoke in the air. Can Brian actually exorcise the demons with only Alyx to help him?
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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This segment is down right scary. I can almost smell the brimstone smoke in the air. Can Brian actually exorcise the demons with only Alyx to help him?
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Ooh, I like that, N -- brimstone smoke. Wish I'd thought of that.
Brian is a 'certified' exorcist, but you are exactly correct, a priest does not usually do anything without lots of reinforcements.
Thanks for a great review!
Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from CR Delport
This is another interesting and well written chapter that makes for a good read. You described the anguish and then the relieve and love very well. Good job. I found no obvious errors.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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This is another interesting and well written chapter that makes for a good read. You described the anguish and then the relieve and love very well. Good job. I found no obvious errors.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Christie, thank you so much for this generous and encouraging review. :0) Bev