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Reflections Of Color

Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "American Highway"
A collection of my All-Time Best rated song lyrics

41 total reviews 
Comment from amahra
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Very nice. I really enjoyed reading this poem. The poem was full of truth with great rhymes that wasn't forced; and great rhythmic flow. Loved the art work that you chose for this writing. God bless America.

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 25-May-2015
    Thanks for your comments and support.
Comment from TAB_that's me
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

a wonderful tribute to all of those who fought and died. Our country doesn't always seem so free but compared to many others...well I'll live here.
teresa

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 25-May-2015
    Me too. Thanks for your comments and support.
Comment from LIJ Red
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The meter could use some tweaking. I might change a word or two to a usage I feel better with like SO it is said, but this goes to the prompt with admirable sentiment, so, excellent.

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 25-May-2015
    Thanks for your comments and support.
Comment from Ben Colder
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Well done. I receive your salute. Thank you for allowing me to read your strong worded poem. I appreciate this poem and the poet. Best to you in the comtest. Hope you win.

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 25-May-2015
    Thank you for your comments and support as always.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Excellent
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"Their recognition well deserve..." Well deserve what, pray tell, Brett? Admiration? Respect, humility? This reads rather awkwardly. Perhaps "deserved" would be a better choice here...

You may wish to look at this stanza as well. The meter's a bit off...

White's for the purity of those who are right
led by dignity, honor, and God's light.
Fifty states is all she be.
A beacon for the whole world to see.

Consider;

White's for purity for those who are right,
led by dignity, honor -- God's giving light.
Fifty states, forever She'll be,
A beacon, She shines, for the whole world to see.


Of course, these are just my humble opinions and suggestions. You're free to drop them into the nearest cyber space waste bin as you head out the door...

All in all, I appreciate the message of patriotism and spirit of freedom you're attempting to convey here, especially with Memorial Day fast approaching. I just know you can do much better, I've seen you do it.

Good poem, just needs a bit of "tweaking, is all."

Good luck with it, Brett, and have a Happy Holiday! :)

~Dean

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 24-May-2015
    I also acknowledged your insights into my notes just now. Thanks again for your constant support and encouragement my friend.
reply by Dean Kuch on 24-May-2015
    It's what we're here for, my friend. This would have easily been worthy of a six save for those things I mentioned. I'm sure you'll garner many accolades for this one, and justifiably so.

    Good luck, Brett... ~Dean ;)
Comment from danpald
Excellent
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Proud to read a tribute fair
That blesses this land we share
For the beauty of the country
Lies in the heart of the people here

Some are not so fortunate to see
The blessings of the land of the free
Still they are proud to have found
The ability of speaking so very load

They shout against the liberties
Sometimes disgrace the banner of the free
Still we let them have their voice
Because we know the truth inside

Each one that lives within this land
Has the freedom from the few hallowed lads
That given their all for them to be free
That is why we thank the brave soldiers today

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 25-May-2015
    Enjoyed your poem. Thanks for your comments and support.
Comment from skye
Excellent
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These lines say it all for me. I love our country, love the freedom bought with lives and blood and sacrifice, with intelligence and prayer.
Excellent poem.

This land of opportunity has its flaws tis true
but her colors will always be red, white, and blue.
While her freedom may not be so free
there's no other place I'd rather be.

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 25-May-2015
    Thanks for your comments and continued support.
Comment from sibhus
Excellent
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An excellent entry for this contest. You have captured all the things that are right and good about this country with these words. The rhymes sing the praises of this great country beautifully. A stellar poem, and good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 25-May-2015
    Thanks for your comments and support.
Comment from Spitfire
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your words capture well the reasons to cherish America.
Good explanation for the colors. Love the incorporation of lines from our national anthem. Interesting stanza on the Statue of Liberty. Why is she weak?
















 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 24-May-2015
    Not saying the Statue of Liberty is weak. What I am saying those who come to this country are in need of our help. Thanks for your comments.
Comment from padumachitta
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hello. Certainly fills the prompts rules. A well structured and extensive poem in ode of America and her war Veterans.
Good luck in the contest
padumachitta

 Comment Written 24-May-2015


reply by the author on 25-May-2015
    Thanks for your comments and support.