Expressing Myself
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "honestly..."Writing my way out of depression / mental illness
31 total reviews
Comment from Minglement
This a great entry for the Five line poem contest. Very poignant and creative with an unexpected punch at the end. Well done and I wish you luck in the contest :)
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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This a great entry for the Five line poem contest. Very poignant and creative with an unexpected punch at the end. Well done and I wish you luck in the contest :)
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much for your encouragement!
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You are most welcome. I think you are very creative :)
Comment from bob cullen
To me this poem was both provocative and contradictory. It was also very good.
So how did it provoke. It made me revisit my own circumstances. Did time heal? NO. Was it funny? No. Has it been forty years? NO. Did the old heart beat to spite me? MOST CERTAINLY YES. Did it bring laughter? NO? And the greatest contradiction of all. The title. Honestly. And the Author's name, Playinaround. Clever.
To be really honest, I'm an old cynic and I loved it.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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To me this poem was both provocative and contradictory. It was also very good.
So how did it provoke. It made me revisit my own circumstances. Did time heal? NO. Was it funny? No. Has it been forty years? NO. Did the old heart beat to spite me? MOST CERTAINLY YES. Did it bring laughter? NO? And the greatest contradiction of all. The title. Honestly. And the Author's name, Playinaround. Clever.
To be really honest, I'm an old cynic and I loved it.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you a million!
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Thank you so much for the nomination. I really appreciate that.
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it is 5:30am. I am up with the roosters. I want to leave you another reply to your review for me. ive done fanstory off and on since the 90s and your review is why I cant stop coming back. thank you again for your thoughtful, fun, uplifting review. I was proud of this little poem and you really got it. Much love,
playinaround:)
Comment from Patty Palmer
LOL I can relate to your poem. I swear my heart keeps going just so we can see what happens next!! I, however, find nothing funny about it. Getting old aint for sissies!!!
Good luck with the contest!
Patty
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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LOL I can relate to your poem. I swear my heart keeps going just so we can see what happens next!! I, however, find nothing funny about it. Getting old aint for sissies!!!
Good luck with the contest!
Patty
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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hahahahaha agreed!
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written five-line poem about things that happened to us that sometimes make us feel not ourselves and we try not to feel bitter about others who made our lives miserable.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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A very well-written five-line poem about things that happened to us that sometimes make us feel not ourselves and we try not to feel bitter about others who made our lives miserable.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Very well said, thank you!
Comment from A. Louise Robertson
I enjoyed your succinct verse. I love the words, this old heart beats to spite me. The artwork is very appropriate and well done. I wish you all the best in the contest.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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I enjoyed your succinct verse. I love the words, this old heart beats to spite me. The artwork is very appropriate and well done. I wish you all the best in the contest.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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How encouraging! Thank you so much!
Comment from Bichon
A very interesting poem. In only a few words you have managed to convey emotion and curiosity perfectly. The image is very intriguing too, great work!
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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A very interesting poem. In only a few words you have managed to convey emotion and curiosity perfectly. The image is very intriguing too, great work!
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you very much!
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello, my friend,
I like your five-line poem contest entry. It's funny in a dark humor sort of way. Good job following the contest. I don't like the picture you chose but don't take it personally, I am very picky when it comes to pictures.
Good luck!
Gypsy
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Hello, my friend,
I like your five-line poem contest entry. It's funny in a dark humor sort of way. Good job following the contest. I don't like the picture you chose but don't take it personally, I am very picky when it comes to pictures.
Good luck!
Gypsy
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much for your review!
Comment from Aaqib Naeem
Ouch! This was such a sad one and I would agree with what you are saying! Its a time old myth that time heals everything but that does nothing for the hollowness one feels when in pain and suffering through it! And some scars and heartbreaks are too much to deal with even as time passes!
Best wishes for the contest! Have a good day!
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Ouch! This was such a sad one and I would agree with what you are saying! Its a time old myth that time heals everything but that does nothing for the hollowness one feels when in pain and suffering through it! And some scars and heartbreaks are too much to deal with even as time passes!
Best wishes for the contest! Have a good day!
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much for your insightfulness and for really getting my poem. Thank you
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You are most welcome! :-)
Comment from Y. M. Roger
A satirical look at that old hurt that just will not heal... a good composition of laughter and past pain for this limited format contest! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck! ;)
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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A satirical look at that old hurt that just will not heal... a good composition of laughter and past pain for this limited format contest! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck! ;)
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much! Jude
Comment from robyn corum
PA,
Hello! Welcome to FS!
What a sad little poem. --sigh-- One that, unfortunately, I'm sure most of us can relate to. At some point, we've all had our hearts broken, haven't we?
Your message is clear and you syllable count is just right. I think this is a very nice entry for the contest.
As far as worrying whether anyone saw you -- don't fret. You'll always see that there will be MANY more views than reviews. *smile* You can't let that bother you. Just be patient. The readers will come.
Thanks a lot and good luck!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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PA,
Hello! Welcome to FS!
What a sad little poem. --sigh-- One that, unfortunately, I'm sure most of us can relate to. At some point, we've all had our hearts broken, haven't we?
Your message is clear and you syllable count is just right. I think this is a very nice entry for the contest.
As far as worrying whether anyone saw you -- don't fret. You'll always see that there will be MANY more views than reviews. *smile* You can't let that bother you. Just be patient. The readers will come.
Thanks a lot and good luck!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you Robyn, I am encouraged. I came back to this site a decade after I stopped it. I forgot how much fun it is... judy
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welcome!