Unyielding Trial
on mental health41 total reviews
Comment from Thomas Bowling
The stench of its presence seeps into your pores. Its frayed leash, a rotted albatross of emotional maggots snakes up the ankles. Slithers its way into your soul. Sucks the air. Strangles your life-force without a care.
You write with a rare powerful voice. This is excellent.
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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The stench of its presence seeps into your pores. Its frayed leash, a rotted albatross of emotional maggots snakes up the ankles. Slithers its way into your soul. Sucks the air. Strangles your life-force without a care.
You write with a rare powerful voice. This is excellent.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Thomas Bowling, wow, thank you immensely. I am honored. My goal is akways to write emotionally and evoke emotion from the reader. Again a big thank you! My name is Jimi
Comment from Irish Rain
This is wonderfully descriptive. My sister suffered this for years, then committed suicide. 'depression gloats'....the best way to put it. Great write!! Blessings...
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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This is wonderfully descriptive. My sister suffered this for years, then committed suicide. 'depression gloats'....the best way to put it. Great write!! Blessings...
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Irish Rain,
I am so sorry to hear. Actually very saddened to hear.
Many times people who suffer so do not realize what it is and do not realize its toll. I know a few whose actions and deeds reflect such depression but they cannot see it. Perhaps a good thing, except they lose focus and friendships and relationships. My sister suffers severely. She's quite arrogant and mean and downright nasty, then just breaks into tears.
I am so terribly sorry to hear about your sister.
Thank you for stopping by,very talented one. I am humbled.
Jimi
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What a lovely reply!! I'm sure I'm no more talented though than anyone else, I wish!...ha ha. Blessings to your sister. Mine lived with this for 46 years. We waited daily for a phone call, that she'd either killed someone, or herself. She could be very angry, violent too. A shame. I know she is happy and free now. Thanks for your lovely caring.
Comment from Linda Hughes
The poem depicts the hell of that kind of depression very well. I like how you use the imagery of the black dog, and what it symbolizes. The language has a sinister beat to it, as if horror music is playing in the background. As I read, I just want the black dog dead, in order to see the light, or just let me die. Great poem.
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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The poem depicts the hell of that kind of depression very well. I like how you use the imagery of the black dog, and what it symbolizes. The language has a sinister beat to it, as if horror music is playing in the background. As I read, I just want the black dog dead, in order to see the light, or just let me die. Great poem.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Linda Hughes,
Thank you so very much for stopping by to read and review my work. I am truly honored.. jlsavell
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written heartfelt and sad poem. I am very sorry that anyone have to deal with such a horrible thing as depression and even anxiety can be devastating for the sufferer.
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reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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A very well-written heartfelt and sad poem. I am very sorry that anyone have to deal with such a horrible thing as depression and even anxiety can be devastating for the sufferer.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Sandra du Plessis,
thank you for stopping by to read and review my work. I am truly honored.
jls
Comment from Rasmine
This is really good.
I have a friend who suffers greatly because of this. So much now, that she gives up on showering, driving safely (including cleaning her glasses), and anything that helps her. She is diabetic and eats sugar like crazy. All I can do is pray.
Some of my favorite lines:
Its (It's) frayed leash, a rotted albatross of emotional maggots snakes up the ankles. Slithers its way into your soul. Sucks the air. Strangles your life-force withpout (without) a care. Silent isolation from an unloving world. As the leaden curtains fall, the sensitive soul curls in a ball. Encased in a blackened stage. Trying desperately, futilely- to ward off the predators of mortality.
TC
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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This is really good.
I have a friend who suffers greatly because of this. So much now, that she gives up on showering, driving safely (including cleaning her glasses), and anything that helps her. She is diabetic and eats sugar like crazy. All I can do is pray.
Some of my favorite lines:
Its (It's) frayed leash, a rotted albatross of emotional maggots snakes up the ankles. Slithers its way into your soul. Sucks the air. Strangles your life-force withpout (without) a care. Silent isolation from an unloving world. As the leaden curtains fall, the sensitive soul curls in a ball. Encased in a blackened stage. Trying desperately, futilely- to ward off the predators of mortality.
TC
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Rasmine, thank you for stopping by to read and review my work. I appreciate you.
jls
Comment from crich
Wow. And I mean that as a compliment. I was thinking how Poe-like your poem was before I read the raven stanza! My cousin's son suffers and you are right, we have ridden the roller coaster of doctors, tough love, endless encouragement, while searching for the right doctor with the miracle drug. It's no wonder people submit to shock treatment - anything to kill the black dog. Well done and I admire you for going to that dark place to dredge up these images. That takes courage.
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Wow. And I mean that as a compliment. I was thinking how Poe-like your poem was before I read the raven stanza! My cousin's son suffers and you are right, we have ridden the roller coaster of doctors, tough love, endless encouragement, while searching for the right doctor with the miracle drug. It's no wonder people submit to shock treatment - anything to kill the black dog. Well done and I admire you for going to that dark place to dredge up these images. That takes courage.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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crich,
Now tis is truly humbling. I am rarely on here, but I have read some of your work.impressive to say the least. thank you so very much. I am honored. jlsavell
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You are welcome - and thanks for the compliment. I love finding great writers on this site - you are in that category.
Comment from Poetic Friend
Welcome back, my dearest and longest Fanstory friend! As infrequent as it is, I get exciting when you post. I know I am going tone literally fulfilled with one of your writes, and I am not disappointed at all with this one.
In fact, I am enlightened. Thank you so much for bringing the mental health issues to FanStory. It is an issue that begs for attention. Your well-chosen word choice, imagery, metaphors and similes accurately paint the picture of the person who suffers from mental health.
Although I currently do not work in the mental health field, I spent years working in the filed. I actually worked in a crisis stabilization unit. I saw the metal health patients in their crisis stages. I saw the impacts that the illness has on their family members and loved ones. I heard the mental health patients' cries.
Your poem depicts it all with such a compelling and an artistic approach.
Again, thank you again, Jimi.
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Welcome back, my dearest and longest Fanstory friend! As infrequent as it is, I get exciting when you post. I know I am going tone literally fulfilled with one of your writes, and I am not disappointed at all with this one.
In fact, I am enlightened. Thank you so much for bringing the mental health issues to FanStory. It is an issue that begs for attention. Your well-chosen word choice, imagery, metaphors and similes accurately paint the picture of the person who suffers from mental health.
Although I currently do not work in the mental health field, I spent years working in the filed. I actually worked in a crisis stabilization unit. I saw the metal health patients in their crisis stages. I saw the impacts that the illness has on their family members and loved ones. I heard the mental health patients' cries.
Your poem depicts it all with such a compelling and an artistic approach.
Again, thank you again, Jimi.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Poetic Friend, I miss you terribly. I just wish I had time to be on here more. I do not. I have so much going on. I AM ALWAYS TRULY HUMBLED OVER YOUR REVIEWS. I do not know how well deserved they are, but you inspire and encourage me to continue writing. thank you... Jimi
Comment from Nika2016
You can have my six for this in depth portrayal of depression that sounds more like Hell, itself..Some of the imagery seems too surreal like a bad acid trip...
like children screaming, wringing their hands and Raven speaking among blackbirds...but the writing and expression of pain are excellent...I hear those ravens and I am not depressed...
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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You can have my six for this in depth portrayal of depression that sounds more like Hell, itself..Some of the imagery seems too surreal like a bad acid trip...
like children screaming, wringing their hands and Raven speaking among blackbirds...but the writing and expression of pain are excellent...I hear those ravens and I am not depressed...
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Nika, again a big thank you for not only the review but for promoting. You know I vacillate between returning and not returning. Writing is in my heart and Fanstory use to be, but it becomes so time consuming. Again a big big thank you. your fan and friend. jimi
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Panax Ginseng has helped lots of people with depression...Of course, it is not for all, but my cousin does not have to take antidepressants any more...It boosts my good moods...
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Well..it's just special when you are here..so keep returning periodically.
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Essential oils are exceptional for depression. I too am a natural and holistic woman.
Comment from Joan E.
I knew Churchill had his dark days, but I did not realize he produced more words than Shakespeare and Dickens combined. Thank you for sharing this very sensitive treatment of the subject of depression. I particularly admired your "black dog" and "leash" metaphor and all your echoing sounds, plus Poe's "raven". Down with judgement and here's to compassion! My best wishes for your sister and friends-Joan
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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I knew Churchill had his dark days, but I did not realize he produced more words than Shakespeare and Dickens combined. Thank you for sharing this very sensitive treatment of the subject of depression. I particularly admired your "black dog" and "leash" metaphor and all your echoing sounds, plus Poe's "raven". Down with judgement and here's to compassion! My best wishes for your sister and friends-Joan
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Joan, good afternoon traveling woman. Thank you so very much for this review. I am honored. Hope all is well with you.
Again thank you. Jimi
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So good to hear from you again. I do plan to be home for the rest of June! Hope this is the beginning of a productive new week for us both. Hugs- Joan
Comment from Mabaker
Hi dearest Jimi, So glad you are back. Now a little story for you. 1975 due to domestic violence I had a horrible breakdown. I started on the Serepax road to hell. I sat in a darkened room for hours, until someone suggested a walk would do me good. I walked out my front door and got past two houses, scared and depressed I came back to my house and went to go inside my back door, Suddenly I knew something was waiting for me behind the door. If not there then under a bed or in a cupboard. I didn't know what it looked like but I knew it waited for me. I huddled on the top step for hours, until my children found me when they came home from school, too afraid to go inside. Yes Jimi I have looked into the eyes of the black dog of total depression.
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Hi dearest Jimi, So glad you are back. Now a little story for you. 1975 due to domestic violence I had a horrible breakdown. I started on the Serepax road to hell. I sat in a darkened room for hours, until someone suggested a walk would do me good. I walked out my front door and got past two houses, scared and depressed I came back to my house and went to go inside my back door, Suddenly I knew something was waiting for me behind the door. If not there then under a bed or in a cupboard. I didn't know what it looked like but I knew it waited for me. I huddled on the top step for hours, until my children found me when they came home from school, too afraid to go inside. Yes Jimi I have looked into the eyes of the black dog of total depression.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2017
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Anne, dearest friend,
I am so very sorry you suffer from this. I have had bouts of depression but never to this extent. i know many whose life is such a struggle because of depression. They have poor relationships and are often very reactionary.
I do hope you are doing well. I admire you and I am so sorry I am hardly here on Fanstory.
again thank you
your fan and friend always jimi
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I joined AA as the town didn't have NA got clean of the drugs put a positive outlook into practice and slowly got better. Now I write any rotten feelings I harbour, and the good ones too, Love U Anne.