Reviews from

Another Pretty Face

Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "Chapter 7, part three"
Can love survive small town gossip?

80 total reviews 
Comment from dmjones
Excellent
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Excellent chapter. Now there's some tension and suspense. Sara's now a little afraid of Joe and has every right to be but I hope she realizes soon he won't her.

Just one thing:

far all we know we're looking for (is) a white SUV." (It's not quite clear without the is)

 Comment Written 03-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 03-Oct-2010
    Thank you catching this error. I have taken care of it. I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from patmedium
Excellent
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Excellent, Barbara. I have thoroughly enjoyed the tension of this section. I can visualise her bewilderment as all these folk suddenly materialise out of nowhere, seems like, and turn her life into a maelstrom!
Thanks for the update on the treatment. xxxxxxxxxx

 Comment Written 03-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 03-Oct-2010
    Thank you for your kind review. I will be e-mailing you when I return from church.
Comment from bookishfabler
Excellent
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Yet another great chapter. Now it's getting very exciting. I like how you built the characters and then have the child missing. The added touch with violence and trust, makes it pop. Great job. Saw no nits. Good luck, sweetie. I hope you do well with the chemo.
hugs book

 Comment Written 03-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 03-Oct-2010
    Thank you for your kind review. I appreciate your support.
reply by bookishfabler on 03-Oct-2010
    Same here. Good luck darling
    hugs Heidi
Comment from Readywriter52
Excellent
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Joe and his team are looking for Cassie. They think she might have been lured away by a person who claimed he was a fifteen-year-old boy. Also, Sara seems very concerned about the violence Joe displayed in front of her. She is wondering if he could hurt her or Cassie. It really shocked her.

 Comment Written 03-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 03-Oct-2010
    Thank you for your kind review. Hey, would you write my synopis. I can never figure out how to condense my story into a few words. LOL You always do it so well.
Comment from Nanashirley
Excellent
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This is another good chapter. I feel sorry that she is so insecure that she can't trust the man she loves. To me it is silly but I think it adds another side to her character. I saw no need for editing but was reading intently.

 Comment Written 03-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 03-Oct-2010
    Thank you for your kind review. Sara has spent years having her self-esteem destroyed. It will take awhile to build it up.
Comment from Rama Rao
Excellent
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One more excellent chapter,as usual, which made excellent reading. Now that you brought the Task force into play, Cassie's mystery would be solved soon I'm sure.
I nurse her so she's very opinionated about bottles." -here I thought as would be more appropriate in place of so.
Great Job and wish you well for your health and computer.

 Comment Written 03-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 03-Oct-2010
    Thank you for your kind review. I have my future posts on the computer and no back up. I hope they can fix it.
Comment from Dave M
Excellent
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Barbara,

I enjoyed reading this chapter and found one nit:

"Sara's eyes watched Matt and Dani exit the front door and said under her breath,..." Eyes don't say things under their breath. You could say "Sara watched..." or break the sentence.

Best wishes for your chemo being successful, and I hope it isn't too rough.

Dave

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 03-Oct-2010
    I am more afraid of the chemo than I was the surgery. I have even had desks answer telephones, I will make that correction. Thank you for your review.
Comment from LadyWave
Excellent
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I like the new tension and doubt surrounding Sara and Joe. It gives even more depth to the story. Glad to hear you're returning to work!

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 03-Oct-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from djuan
Excellent
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What I liked most about this was your effortless dialogue and how your able to keep so many characters interacting at one time from being confusing. That's a very difficult thing to do but you pull it off splendidly. The story seems very captivating, but I will have to go back and read a few more chapters before I comment further.

Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 02-Oct-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Fireshadow
Excellent
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Barbara, this is another excellent installment for this story. The narrative flows and reads smoothly and the dialogue is crisp and highly credible as you develop the storyline at a nice clip. Found no spag errors. very well done, my friend.

Ama

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2010


reply by the author on 02-Oct-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.