Reviews from

Along the Jericho Road

Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Toka Moon, Pt. 1"
Murder Mystery

51 total reviews 
Comment from AprilShower
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level


Wow! This is a really spooky chapter. I am wondering what was meant by Lost agna, vos es iam mei (Lost lamb, you are already mine). It sound awful that his church is suffering from loss of funding. I am anxious to read the next chapter. I liked the part about his dog, Alyx. This is well written, Bev.

April


 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Hi, April. Thank you so very much for this very generous review! I really appreciate your support and kind comments. Warmest regards, Bev
reply by AprilShower on 21-Jun-2012
    You're welcome, Bev. Warmest regards to you, too. April
Comment from wordsfromsue
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh my goodness, what a a warm and fuzzy chapter! Eek, the ghostly shape and its threat at the end are pretty scary! What on earth caused this thing's appearance?
What don't we know about Father Brian yet?
This chapter definitely heats things up in an interesting way.
I don't like that humanoid thing.... that's just scary! :-(

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Hi, sue. You're too funny! Thanks for the support and generous review, my friend. I really appreciate you following my story. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Showboat
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Oh my, Bev, that was simply outstanding. It seems ages since I last read a chapter of this book, but I still remember enough to know how much I love it.

Excellent, and when the time comes, talk to me about publishing this wonderful story.

Hugs,
Gayle

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Gayle, I'm deeply moved by your generosity! Thank you so much for your support, and I'm honored by your offer. There's lots more to come on the action front. The killer is just getting started. Hugs, Bev
Comment from TammyGail
Excellent
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This was wow Bev....
i so wish i had another star for you
it was on the edge, so very descriptive throughout .. your story is really coming together ... your storytelling skills shine ever bright.. thanks for another great read

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Tammy, you're wonderful words are worth a dozen stars! You know how much I admire your talent, so they are especially appreciated. Love ya, Bev
Comment from jaeladarling
Excellent
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The story is coming along nicely. :) Good character development, and I like the thoughts sprinkled into the narrative. Gives us perfect insight into the subject's mind (obviously, haha). Nice work!

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Hi, jaela. I so apprecite your support and generous review for my chapter. Thank you for stopping by! Warm regards, Bev
Comment from judiverse
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Six stars for this. You created suspense, and kind of set up appearance of the ghostly creature with the dog acting as if on alert to something. You do a great job of showing what's going on in Father Brian's mind, Recollection of the confession of the self-described Satanist was interesting. Father Brian's worry over whether he would lose parishioners after Debra's death and worries over the church's financial situation are good and realistic. The reader gets the feeling of spooky things going on. judi

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Judi, I am very honored by this generous rating. Your words really have me smiling, as well. It's so kind of you to let me know what worked in the chapter. That helps me more than you know. Warmest regards, Bev
reply by judiverse on 21-Jun-2012
    You're so welcome. judi
reply by judiverse on 22-Jun-2012
    You're welcome. judi
Comment from c_lucas
Excellent
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You are doing a good job of revealing the fears and weakness of the Priest. Early in my life, I found the command, "In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost, be gone." I relate this to you because the priest's response seem weak. In real life the one, I quoted you has worked on numerous occasions. Your choice. Very well written.

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Hi, charlie. Thank you for your great review. I think you are right about the weakness of that line. It sounds like you've had some encounters with demonic entities. I know that I have as well. In my studying of the subject, it seems that many exorcists make a point of mentioning the blood of Jesus and baptism. The former really incites the anger of the entities. So, I think I'll extend my statement to include your excellent suggestion. Thanks, as always, for the support! Bev
reply by c_lucas on 21-Jun-2012
    You're welcome, Bev. Everyone wants to make a big issue over it. 90 percent of the time it's nothing. About the other ten per cent, my lips are sealed. You're doing a good job.
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Oh, now you've gone and piqued my curiosity, charlie. :0)
reply by c_lucas on 21-Jun-2012
    Didn't mean to.
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    I'll get over it :0)
reply by c_lucas on 21-Jun-2012
    keep up the good writing.
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Thanks, charlie. Appreciate that!
reply by c_lucas on 21-Jun-2012
    You're welcome.
Comment from GoodieMama
Excellent
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Interesting, very interesting chapter. To get caught up in the story, and it being a middle section of the story, speaks wonders about your talent as an author. Not many people have that kind of skill to do so, but I have to go back to the previous chapters to learn what happened to Debra and what the man said to Father Brian in confession.

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Thank you very kindly for your awesome review, GoodieMama. I really appreciate your generosity in both your rating and your support. Hope you'll come back for Part 2. Kind regards, Bev
Comment from Taurean Monkey
Excellent
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This is an interesting comment which relates to the changing nature of society and business in general (the old ways are being replaced by the new):
Responsibility for St. Matilde's financial crisis rested squarely on his shoulders. He believed it was the inevitable fall-out of his loss of inspiration and, to a degree, young families being lured to independent churches run by charismatic preachers armed with business savvy.

You can't lie to a dog, can you?!
Ooh, I really like your ending. Father Brian doesn't/didn't believe in ghosts up until that moment... Excellent writing, regards TM

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Thank you very kindly, TM. I really appreciate the time you took to let me know what worked for you in this chapter. That is always helpful to me. You are most generous! Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Gungalo
Excellent
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Oh and now he does believe in them. What on earth can he do? Perhaps it is just something crazy. Yet, there it stands waiting for him. Oh oh ...

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2012
    Hi, Gungalo. I always enjoy getting your take on the action LOL! Love it ... thanks much! Bev
reply by Gungalo on 21-Jun-2012
    Sigh.