Along the Jericho Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 46 "Okoka Moon, Part 1"Murder Mystery
49 total reviews
Comment from c_lucas
A very strong attention for the ending of this post. The post offered yet to be answers for numerous questions. This has a smooth flow of words.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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A very strong attention for the ending of this post. The post offered yet to be answers for numerous questions. This has a smooth flow of words.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Thanks so much, charlie. I appreciate your continued support and graciously generous review. :0) Bev
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You're welcome, Bev. Charlie
Comment from joneau2
The continuation of the story remains interesting. I enjoyed you spending some time talking about the priest, and Maureen (quite a number). You still left the hook with talk of devil being involved somehow.
A couple of things. "waking from his naps andHe's been known to ..." - ???? "Her eyes reflected militance. screaming until he's hoarse." - ????
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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The continuation of the story remains interesting. I enjoyed you spending some time talking about the priest, and Maureen (quite a number). You still left the hook with talk of devil being involved somehow.
A couple of things. "waking from his naps andHe's been known to ..." - ???? "Her eyes reflected militance. screaming until he's hoarse." - ????
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Hi, Joneau. Thank you for mentioning that section that I had meant to delete in the editing process. Another reviewer mentioned it, and I've changed it. I appreciate the support and encouragement.
:0) Bev
Comment from MENNIPLOSS
Do something which was not: But you know you're one of my favorite writers. I like escribies and your stories are very good. This chapter is beautiful, with a captivating narrative.
A big hug as always and my admiration.
atte: your friend.
menni
from MEXICO.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Do something which was not: But you know you're one of my favorite writers. I like escribies and your stories are very good. This chapter is beautiful, with a captivating narrative.
A big hug as always and my admiration.
atte: your friend.
menni
from MEXICO.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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What a delightful review, Menni. Thank you so much for your gracious words and encouraging insights. I always am totally delighted to hear from you! Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from Connie C
What a great description of Harriet Brubaker as she takes communion and puts the wafer in her pocket and of the exchange between her and Morton. Good description of Maureen Penfold too! In the paragraph starting with "Since Georgie has no family . . .," there seem to be some words missing before "screaming until he's hoarse." Pretty scary at the end starting with "you're killing me." You left me hanging, Bev. I want to know what's going on; can't wait for the next chapter.
You should be proud of this novel of yours, my friend. It just keeps getting better and better. In spite of that one little thing I pointed out, this is so worthy of a sixer.
Hugs,
Connie
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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What a great description of Harriet Brubaker as she takes communion and puts the wafer in her pocket and of the exchange between her and Morton. Good description of Maureen Penfold too! In the paragraph starting with "Since Georgie has no family . . .," there seem to be some words missing before "screaming until he's hoarse." Pretty scary at the end starting with "you're killing me." You left me hanging, Bev. I want to know what's going on; can't wait for the next chapter.
You should be proud of this novel of yours, my friend. It just keeps getting better and better. In spite of that one little thing I pointed out, this is so worthy of a sixer.
Hugs,
Connie
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Hi, Connie. Boy, I really screwed up on that section LOL. I meant to edit it out and got sidetracked (happens a lot - too much). I've changed that section and now it actually makes sense! Thank you for the six despite the glaring screw-up, my friend. Your generosity and support mean so much!
Hugs, Bev
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
ah, a treat today - one of your chapters...
to me you're the most talented writer, Bev.
The very best. This is so creepy.
a couple of minor things to put right..
his naps andHe's been
his naps and he's been
Her eyes reflected militance. screaming until he's hoarse.
Her eyes reflected militance. 'Screaming until he's hoarse.
Great writing.
Margaret
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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ah, a treat today - one of your chapters...
to me you're the most talented writer, Bev.
The very best. This is so creepy.
a couple of minor things to put right..
his naps andHe's been
his naps and he's been
Her eyes reflected militance. screaming until he's hoarse.
Her eyes reflected militance. 'Screaming until he's hoarse.
Great writing.
Margaret
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Margaret, your words are absolute gold to me. And thank you for the six despite the major screw-up in the section you mentioned. A couple other reviewers pointed it out, thankfully, and I've edited it as I'd intended originally before getting sidetracked!
I really appreciate your support and encouragement, my friend.
Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from Gungalo
Boy now there is action for sure. Poor Father, he doesn't know what to do does he? It's something that involves his rectory for sure. He's stunned.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Boy now there is action for sure. Poor Father, he doesn't know what to do does he? It's something that involves his rectory for sure. He's stunned.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Nice to hear from you, Gungalo. And I much appreciate your gracious review! Warmest regards, Bev
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Smiling at you.
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:0)
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:)
Comment from boxergirl
Great story line. Dialogue and descriptions keep the story moving smoothly. The action is rising all the time which keeps the reader engaged in the story. Good chapter! :-)
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Great story line. Dialogue and descriptions keep the story moving smoothly. The action is rising all the time which keeps the reader engaged in the story. Good chapter! :-)
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Thank you so much, boxergirl. I appreciate your insights and support. :0) Bev
Comment from jadapenn
Cool bananas, what the freakin heck is going on? Excellent writing, but why is Father Brian so petrified. Me smells a rat! Geez, y¸u developed dear .aureen well in such a short chapter. I feel this is a telling episode where we'll get just a little wiser about what's going on. Well written, friend. I truly enjoyed. Luv jada
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Cool bananas, what the freakin heck is going on? Excellent writing, but why is Father Brian so petrified. Me smells a rat! Geez, y¸u developed dear .aureen well in such a short chapter. I feel this is a telling episode where we'll get just a little wiser about what's going on. Well written, friend. I truly enjoyed. Luv jada
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Thanks so much, buddy. Yes, this is giving us insight into what's at the heart of these murders. I appreciate your great insights and support very much, Jada.
XXx Bev
Hugs, Bev
Comment from chasennov
Along The Jericho Road.' Okoka Moon, Part One.' As always, you're work is excellently written. I admire your formulation which I find is of the very best, and your structure is just as good. Well done.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Along The Jericho Road.' Okoka Moon, Part One.' As always, you're work is excellently written. I admire your formulation which I find is of the very best, and your structure is just as good. Well done.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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Thank you so much for your gracious insights and review, C. Your support is really appreciated! :0) Bev
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You're so very welcome, Bev. Thank you for that.
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:0)