Reviews from

Haiku (beneath smoky skies)

Observed and heard when temperatures reached 106 degrees.

91 total reviews 
Comment from R.A.Partin
Excellent
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This haiku sounds like what happens during a forest fire, something that has been happening an awful lot lately, especially up here in Washington. The haze isn't as bad as it was when there was a big fire in Canada, though. Still, poor trees. Good job.

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 04-Sep-2017
    Yes, R.A.Partin, I had quite an odyssey with this poem. On Friday my dog insisted that I take her outside for a walk in 106 degree heat when the sidewalks were void of people because of the heat and the smoke from distant fires. It was then I heard pine cones pop open. On Saturday, I visited Los Angeles where the largest fire in the city's history burned. Smoke and ashes were everywhere. I decided to keep the adjective "smokey" and post my poem there. Thank you for your review and compliments.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Excellent
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This speaks a specific state of Nature in view in evident natural day of calamity, when Hercules is in action, a scenic view is clear of such state, smokey skies, evergreen crackle; I liked.

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Yes, it was so hot Friday, that heat records were shattered and pine cones opened throughout the region ringed by brush fires. Thank you for your review.
Comment from DiaMarEl
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Your poem gives a very clear depiction of one of the "victims" of forest fires. At least I interpret that as what you are describing. I can hear the noisy demise of the pine cone clearly despite the structured syllable count requirement of a Haiku. The picture accompanying your poem is also very fitting. A very nice entry for the contest! Best wishes.

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Yes, there are some pines that only open their cones to disperse seeds after a forest fire but they can also pop open in extreme heat, which is what I heard. Thank you for your review and for wishing me the best in the contest.
Comment from Thomas Bowling
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Very good. When the pine cones open, be sure to gather the pine nuts. They cost a fortune and are necessary when making pesto. I read Boo Ghost's story The Good, Bad, and the Ugly. I was sorry to see you were the first one to go.

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Well, Thomas, you know that Boo followed the old adage "the black dude died first." I will check his homage out and search for pine nuts. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Thal1959
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Very well done, Andre. I have heard about this sort of thing. The pine cones are sort of sealed with that sap that has the wonderful "pine" scent to it. When temps get too hot, the sap thins and drips away allowing the cone to pop open and drop its seeds. This is why many tress emerge after a forest fire.

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Yes, I had never heard or observed this phenomenon before until last Friday reached 106. I searched the neighborhood trees for the source of the sound and discovered that only trees with pine cones produced this popping sound. Thank you for your review.
reply by Thal1959 on 03-Sep-2017
    I have never experienced it either, Andre. My favorite occurrence, probably because it is so rare, happens when the ice coated branches on trees are exposed to direct sunlight on a somewhat warm day. The ice on the top of the branches melts first until the ice on the sides and bottom can no longer hold on to the branch.

    When this happens, a sleeve of ice drops off the branch. But since the top most branches receive the most sunlight, the ice dislodges from an upper branch which falls to the branch beneath it, which breaks that sleeve free.

    It's a waterfall of ice cascading down as each sleeve hits another branch below it dislodging more sleeves. Time, temperature, and conditions have to be just right for this to happen. I last saw it happen over twenty years ago.
Comment from Zinnia48
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I love the way this haiku eludes to a bigger story, without specifically identifying it. Mostly I appreciate the way it engages both my visual and my olfactory senses: crackle/pop. thanks and good luck! CAroline

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Yes, Caroline, I appealed to three senses in my Haiku. Thank you for noting them and for your kind review.
Comment from JW
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Thanks for sharing this poem about pine cones. I have to admit though that even though I has seen pine cones most of my life, I have never heard one.

They are good though for starting campfires. :-) JW

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Well, it must not be hot enough where you are, JW. Most people stay inside during heatwaves but my dog had to go for a walk. The popping and crackling of pine cones in the trees around me mystified and amazed me. Thank you for your review.
Comment from kahpot
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Excellent, what an amazing find this must have been, to actually witness the event, I personally would have been inside at 106degrees, wonderful artwork( is this the culprit) thank you and good luck****kahpot

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Yes, most people stay inside during heatwaves and I wanted to stay inside, too, but my dog had to go for a walk despite the heat which is how I heard this natural phenomenon. Thank you for your review and for wishing me luck in the contest.
Comment from LIJ Red
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Not here, yet. The dregs of Harvey dropped a pine branch on my porch. The burrs
were green and tightly clenched. An excellent Haiku, I do believe. No shortage of seasonal references.

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Thank you got your review. My Houston family barely missed being flooded. Meanwhile, we contend with heat and brush fires in California. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Daniel Silverhawk
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Nice job keeping with the
5-7-5 format for the haiku.
I have seen some wild fires in my day and it's true. The pinecones do pop open. And the evergreens burning fill the sky with dark gray and black smoke. A rather frightening sight. Nice poem though. Thanks for sharing

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2017
    Yes, Daniel, it has been a hot season here in California. Heat records were shattered throughout smokey Northern California on Friday. I drove down to Los Angeles the next day where it was not only hotter, but the largest brush fire in the city's history burned in the mountains behind my family's apartment! Smelling smoke and walking in ashes, I decided to post my Haiku. Thank you for your kind review.