Lonely Hearts Meet
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Part two chapter three"Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.
90 total reviews
Comment from mumsyone
I enjoyed reading this continuing chapter of your book for review. As usual, it is well written. I hope you had a nice Easter. God bless...
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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I enjoyed reading this continuing chapter of your book for review. As usual, it is well written. I hope you had a nice Easter. God bless...
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from MaryMeadid
Hi Barbara- I have read and reviewed several of your chapter in this story now, you never disappoint! And every time I see your name I think to myself- hey, isn't she already a famous writer?
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Hi Barbara- I have read and reviewed several of your chapter in this story now, you never disappoint! And every time I see your name I think to myself- hey, isn't she already a famous writer?
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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I wish I was a famous author, but no. Thank you for your kind review and encouraging words.
Comment from Des Beirne
I am sorry I've joined this story late. The greatest compliment I can pay is to tell you that I want to catch up on the previous chapters. It's a riveting read.
I hope you don't mind but I spotted what may be a tiny typo, I could easily be wrong as UK/US are slightly different.
"Of course." He stood, started to leaned(to lean or leaned???) over her, but changed his mind. "I'll be back in a few minutes."
I'm off to catch up.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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I am sorry I've joined this story late. The greatest compliment I can pay is to tell you that I want to catch up on the previous chapters. It's a riveting read.
I hope you don't mind but I spotted what may be a tiny typo, I could easily be wrong as UK/US are slightly different.
"Of course." He stood, started to leaned(to lean or leaned???) over her, but changed his mind. "I'll be back in a few minutes."
I'm off to catch up.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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I have already corrected that typo. I appreciate your kind words and eagle eye.
Comment from Nanette Mary
Hullo Barbara ....
After all the violence and suffering that Anna and even her little son had endured at the hands of Bobby, this chapter provides a glimpse of kindness and gentleness for
both of them. It also reflects the human understanding of the Nurse who took the little fellow through to his mother.
There are just a few small changes to recommend ...
* You have - Is it all right if I go see him? I suggest -
Is it alright if go and see him?
* You have - He stood, started to leaned over her .. this should be - to lean over her ....
* You have - It would really help her to see for herself he's all right. I suggest - to see for herself that he's alright.
* You have - rolled a portable crib in the room. I suggest - into the room.
In your own life, I do hope that you are making steady progress in your battle for renewed good health and that this holy time of Easter has brought you many Blessings.
Love from .... Nanette Mary.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Hullo Barbara ....
After all the violence and suffering that Anna and even her little son had endured at the hands of Bobby, this chapter provides a glimpse of kindness and gentleness for
both of them. It also reflects the human understanding of the Nurse who took the little fellow through to his mother.
There are just a few small changes to recommend ...
* You have - Is it all right if I go see him? I suggest -
Is it alright if go and see him?
* You have - He stood, started to leaned over her .. this should be - to lean over her ....
* You have - It would really help her to see for herself he's all right. I suggest - to see for herself that he's alright.
* You have - rolled a portable crib in the room. I suggest - into the room.
In your own life, I do hope that you are making steady progress in your battle for renewed good health and that this holy time of Easter has brought you many Blessings.
Love from .... Nanette Mary.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Thank you for the kind review and eagle eye. My dictionary has all right as two words it says alright is never acceptable.
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That is amazing! In our ordinary everyday writing in the old country, alright is the only way!
Love - N.M.
Comment from Perp Ihebom
THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL CHAPTER. I am happy that mother and child survived the brute's onslaught .I am also happy that Troy is determined to help them pull through the mess. kudos
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL CHAPTER. I am happy that mother and child survived the brute's onslaught .I am also happy that Troy is determined to help them pull through the mess. kudos
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from fionageorge
Another great instalment in this story of abuse and love, of one good man and one brutal man, and a woman and her baby. You have used dialogue effectively, and the scenarios are believable. The interaction between Troy and Anna in hospital has an undercurrent of strong emotions. Thanks for sharing and warmest regards, Marijke :o)
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Another great instalment in this story of abuse and love, of one good man and one brutal man, and a woman and her baby. You have used dialogue effectively, and the scenarios are believable. The interaction between Troy and Anna in hospital has an undercurrent of strong emotions. Thanks for sharing and warmest regards, Marijke :o)
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from kiwisteveh
Your story is flowing nicely and is error-free as far as I can tell - trust me, I'm an English teacher!
My instincts tell me that real-life wouldn't go as smoothly as this - it's usually way more messy and complicated, but I know you have further complcations to throw into the mix yet, so I'll wait for those.
Keep churning it out and I'll keep reading.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Your story is flowing nicely and is error-free as far as I can tell - trust me, I'm an English teacher!
My instincts tell me that real-life wouldn't go as smoothly as this - it's usually way more messy and complicated, but I know you have further complcations to throw into the mix yet, so I'll wait for those.
Keep churning it out and I'll keep reading.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Thank you for the kind review and encouraging words.
Comment from moyramouse
The conversation between Anna and Troy flowed most convincingly, I could hear them talking in my head. He is a bit of a miracle worker the way he manages to get the nurse to bring Michael to see Anna, and that his conversation with his father has already resulted in a lawyer coming to talk to Anna. Somehow, I don't think everything will keep improving, Bobby is bound to cause a lot more trouble before it is all over. xxmouse
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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The conversation between Anna and Troy flowed most convincingly, I could hear them talking in my head. He is a bit of a miracle worker the way he manages to get the nurse to bring Michael to see Anna, and that his conversation with his father has already resulted in a lawyer coming to talk to Anna. Somehow, I don't think everything will keep improving, Bobby is bound to cause a lot more trouble before it is all over. xxmouse
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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We have not heard the end of Bobby yet. I think Troy is one of those men that melt women's hearts and they will do anything for him. (LOL) Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from dmjones
Hi Barbara, This is a real good emotional chapter. Troy's obviously dealt with this before. And you can see Anna wanting to trust and yet not wanting to believe Bobby is out of her life. I didn't spot any spag.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Hi Barbara, This is a real good emotional chapter. Troy's obviously dealt with this before. And you can see Anna wanting to trust and yet not wanting to believe Bobby is out of her life. I didn't spot any spag.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from jadapenn
Hi Girlfriend, this was a very loving chapter. Troy is smitten but in good control. I think Anna senses this. I hope you had a wonderful Easter too.
Loved this chapter and it was a pleasure to read. luv jada
He stood, started to lean(ed) over her, but changed his mind
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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Hi Girlfriend, this was a very loving chapter. Troy is smitten but in good control. I think Anna senses this. I hope you had a wonderful Easter too.
Loved this chapter and it was a pleasure to read. luv jada
He stood, started to lean(ed) over her, but changed his mind
Comment Written 25-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2011
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I have corrected that error. Thank you for your kind review and eagle eye.