Lonely Hearts Meet
Viewing comments for Chapter 27 "Part four, Chapter 8"Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.
77 total reviews
Comment from Readywriter52
Mrs. Rodgers is a one-track blind woman. She blames everything on Anna. I can see how her son turned out so badly. She spoiled him rotten. I'm glad that Paul put the gear of god in Mrs. Rodgers' husband. He doesn't think his son is perfect. Paul should attach his fee to the settlement. It's something Bobby or his mother should pay for.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Mrs. Rodgers is a one-track blind woman. She blames everything on Anna. I can see how her son turned out so badly. She spoiled him rotten. I'm glad that Paul put the gear of god in Mrs. Rodgers' husband. He doesn't think his son is perfect. Paul should attach his fee to the settlement. It's something Bobby or his mother should pay for.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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I agree. I'll see what happens. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from missy98writer
Barbara,
your chapter is wonderfully written with great descriptive writing and very good and natural dialogue. The hateful soon to be ex-mother-in-law from the pits of hell. As I read I could see the story take place in my head. I could see Mrs Rodgers is a real bitch and the apple doesn't fall far from the cart. I have a feeling that old bitch will be a major hurdle for Anna to deal with. I'm afraid she may incite her son into violence. I sense danger about what the kid said who Bobbie forged Anna's name and the boy quoted what he had said to him: "Bobby Rodgers sold it to me. He said his wife wouldn't need the car where she's going." It sound like a hidden threat to me that's he planning on killing her. Your chapter is excellently written and riveting. I didn't catch any major errors. I look forward to future chapters, but don't rush it since school is around the corner for you, my teacher friend. Keep on writing with heart. Have a blessed day. Love ya...Melissa!
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Barbara,
your chapter is wonderfully written with great descriptive writing and very good and natural dialogue. The hateful soon to be ex-mother-in-law from the pits of hell. As I read I could see the story take place in my head. I could see Mrs Rodgers is a real bitch and the apple doesn't fall far from the cart. I have a feeling that old bitch will be a major hurdle for Anna to deal with. I'm afraid she may incite her son into violence. I sense danger about what the kid said who Bobbie forged Anna's name and the boy quoted what he had said to him: "Bobby Rodgers sold it to me. He said his wife wouldn't need the car where she's going." It sound like a hidden threat to me that's he planning on killing her. Your chapter is excellently written and riveting. I didn't catch any major errors. I look forward to future chapters, but don't rush it since school is around the corner for you, my teacher friend. Keep on writing with heart. Have a blessed day. Love ya...Melissa!
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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I always enjoy hearing from you. You make my day. I have been busy with vacation and then getting things ready for school.
Comment from Writingfundimension
Hi, barbara. This chapter was very difficult to read - I remember a similar scene in my sister's life. You did a great job with the content and dialogue. The situation, as I say, is very realistic for the reader. It would be really nice to see that mother-in-law stir up enough trouble to get herself in hip deep. Well done! Bev
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Hi, barbara. This chapter was very difficult to read - I remember a similar scene in my sister's life. You did a great job with the content and dialogue. The situation, as I say, is very realistic for the reader. It would be really nice to see that mother-in-law stir up enough trouble to get herself in hip deep. Well done! Bev
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
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You're welcome.
Comment from AprilShower
Will there be more to this story, Barbara? It kind of looks like her ex got his meanness from his mother.
Looks like you'll be busy preparing for teaching from now on. Teaching is hard work. I remember those days very well.
Below is the only thing I noticed.
He winked Troy. (He winked at Troy.)
April
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Will there be more to this story, Barbara? It kind of looks like her ex got his meanness from his mother.
Looks like you'll be busy preparing for teaching from now on. Teaching is hard work. I remember those days very well.
Below is the only thing I noticed.
He winked Troy. (He winked at Troy.)
April
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Yes, I will continue this story. I am hoping to post once a week. I hope I don't get behind. I appreciate your kind review and I took care of the at.
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That's great! I'll be looking forward to reading it every week, Barbara. Hope you have a great class this year.
April
Comment from Dave M
Barbara,
It's pretty obvious where Bobby gets his evil disposition. All the same, Anna is one lucky woman to have good people on her side.
I enjoyed this read and have a couple of suggestions:
"Sam stepped beside her. "Did you forget what he did..." I guess Sam is old Mr. Rodgers, Bobby's father, but that wasn't immediately apparent. You could identify Sam a bit earlier as "Sam Rodgers."
"...Troy and Paul were loading a mattress onto a twenty-four feet [foot] moving truck." Just seems better with a change.
Dave
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Barbara,
It's pretty obvious where Bobby gets his evil disposition. All the same, Anna is one lucky woman to have good people on her side.
I enjoyed this read and have a couple of suggestions:
"Sam stepped beside her. "Did you forget what he did..." I guess Sam is old Mr. Rodgers, Bobby's father, but that wasn't immediately apparent. You could identify Sam a bit earlier as "Sam Rodgers."
"...Troy and Paul were loading a mattress onto a twenty-four feet [foot] moving truck." Just seems better with a change.
Dave
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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I did identify in my previous post. Should I do it again? I wanted to put foot there, but I was afraid I would get giged for not having it plural. I will change it.
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Barbara,
If you did identify Sam before, I withdraw my comment. This sort of thing arises because I read one chapter every few days. If it were a book in the palm of my hand, I would've just kept reading.
Dave
Comment from Belinda
Hi, Barbara, I see Mrs. Young is another 'pebble' in Anna's path. She will be surprised if she knows Anna's needs are being taken cared of so well ... :) This is another interesting chapter. A delight to read.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Hi, Barbara, I see Mrs. Young is another 'pebble' in Anna's path. She will be surprised if she knows Anna's needs are being taken cared of so well ... :) This is another interesting chapter. A delight to read.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Thank you for your kind review and insight.
Comment from dportwood
barbara.wilkey,
I like the way you present the character of Mrs. Rodgers. As said before, she is a piece of work. Well done.
One thing -
were loading a mattress onto a twenty-four [feet]
( 'foot' is probably preferred usage)
Duane
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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barbara.wilkey,
I like the way you present the character of Mrs. Rodgers. As said before, she is a piece of work. Well done.
One thing -
were loading a mattress onto a twenty-four [feet]
( 'foot' is probably preferred usage)
Duane
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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I had foot there, but I was afraid somebody would gig me for not having it plural. I agree foot sounds better. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Janie King
Where did the summer go? I'll be praying for you. If you need anything through the week just let me know. I'll do anything I can. This is a well-writen chapter. These kind of stories and people like the mother-in-law are one's worst nightmare. God bless.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Where did the summer go? I'll be praying for you. If you need anything through the week just let me know. I'll do anything I can. This is a well-writen chapter. These kind of stories and people like the mother-in-law are one's worst nightmare. God bless.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Just pray. I still don't have all my energy back and I am worried about it. I appreciate your review and friendship.
Comment from MS Writer
Thanks again for a story with great characters and dialogue. I also find your notes very informative and quite frightening. I enjoy following this story with the caring father and son duo helping her out. Great read.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Thanks again for a story with great characters and dialogue. I also find your notes very informative and quite frightening. I enjoy following this story with the caring father and son duo helping her out. Great read.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Barb
I knew that Anna's mother in-law would be a problem
Barb you did a wonderful job showing her despicable ways
oOf being such from the things she has conjured up so far.
( now to me this made an very well written chapter..
Gert
PS sounds like you are anxious to teach first graders again.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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Hello Barb
I knew that Anna's mother in-law would be a problem
Barb you did a wonderful job showing her despicable ways
oOf being such from the things she has conjured up so far.
( now to me this made an very well written chapter..
Gert
PS sounds like you are anxious to teach first graders again.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2011
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2011
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I miss their cute little antics. I usually struggle not to laugh, when I really should be angry. I appreciate your kind review.
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Smiles
Gert