Reviews from

Lonely Hearts Meet

Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Part two Chapter two"
Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.

70 total reviews 
Comment from cheyennewy
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Barbara,

This story made me raging mad when I read what Bobby did to Anna. Your words are stark and precisely put in order to get the most out of every line. I don't think anyone would blame Anna if she killed him but I doubt she has the physical or emotional strength to do that. This is a great chapter that kept me on the edge of my seat. I hope your doctor can figure out why you have a low blood count and low potassium and protein levels. Tis best to let you rest. Good luck with your radiation treatments. Blessings, chey

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your kind review. I had hoped to get that response from my readers. Thank you for the well wishes.
Comment from amada
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a truly harrowing chapter dear writer. I could understand the feelings of a mother, giving it all for the sake of her child.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    Many women will take abuse, until the abuser to take it out on the children. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Carolyn Hilliard
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Maybe Great Pyrenees helped. It came out very well, made me angry at Bobby; relieved she got to Michael before he hurt the child. Since there were no typos, what can I give you but 6 stars for stirring emotions I would rather not feel; however, let her leave and the child not get killed and I will follow.

Brazilian nuts are 100% protein. Maybe munching on them will help the nausea and the protein. Apricots help potassium levels.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    I have been eating all kinds of nuts and bananas. I will try appricots. I love them. Thank you for your kind review. I think this is the end of the abuse. At least this bad.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
Excellent
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Barbara, this was a hard chapter to read, but your dog is a passable typist. :) If Anna's not dead by morning, she needs to be gone.

Best of luck with your radiation treatment. Prayers and good wishes. :) Nancy

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your prayers, I appreicate them. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from stanishmichelle
Excellent
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I feel sorry for Ana, but it's high time to wake up and leave that sorry excuse for a husband. Just leave with a prayer asking Him for guidance. This last beating must be the final one. Anna should have sunk her teeth hard into Bobby's penis and never let go until it was damaged. It would not solved her dilema, but I would have felt better if he suffered a bit. The story is heating up even more each time I read.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    Thank you for the kind review. This is the final abuse, this bad she takes.
reply by stanishmichelle on 03-Apr-2011
    That's good to know. All the best to you.
Comment from write hand blue
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Very authentic and graphic...leaving you
wondering what is going to happen
next. Well written with a
good descriptive tone
Mel...

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your kind review.
reply by write hand blue on 03-Apr-2011
Comment from Writeaway...
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I am glad that you noted that of the language and sexual content barabra, but since I had read this novel before, I thought I would give it ago. You've written a powerful piece here, you had me on the edge of my seat, I cannot suggest anything for improvment, an excellent job, keep writing!! :)

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your kind review. I thought I better give people a heads up about the language and sexual content. I don't normally write those scenes in my posts, but this is about domestic violence so it needed to be there.
Comment from jadapenn
Excellent
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This game is becoming gruesome and bitter. I can't think that some men can be so brutal and even want to kill a child they made. I would kick him in the balls and get the hell out of there.
Good writing but brutal. luv jada

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    It's realistic of what some women and children go through. This, hopefully, will be last scene this violent. Thank you for your kind review.
reply by jadapenn on 03-Apr-2011
    You make me cry. I detest this man!
Comment from adewpearl
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It came out extremely well, Barbara. The tension in this confrontation is palpable - you make the reader hate this husband utterly and totally as he beats his wife, forces sex upon her, degrades her and then threatens their son. I can feel her determination to do anything to keep him from hurting the baby, so I hope the real danger he has threatened for the child will finally force her to get out of this marriage. She seems like the kind of woman who will put up with abuse of herself out of desperation but will not tolerate abuse of her baby.
Brooke

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    There are many women out there that will put up with abuse, but will protect their children at any cost. I thank you for the review and so does Big Boy, he's positive this is his time for attention. He's just a baby.
Comment from c_lucas
Excellent
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This is very well written giving the reader an insider view of what some women have to go through. There is very good imagery and descritpive scheme. Good job.

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 Comment Written 03-Apr-2011


reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
    Thank you for your kind review.
reply by c_lucas on 03-Apr-2011
    You're welcome, Barbara. Charlie