Writings From the Heart
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Your turn with the Soap"A book of Poetry & Writing
128 total reviews
Comment from samandlancelot
So many times, I think, the need to pretend things are okay is a crutch because of our fear of conflict. It isn't our partner's fault, but our own. I've been a big offender of this, but I'm working on changing. It's so much better.
Not knowing were (where) it's leading, like a duck paddling from land.
to please our partners (partner's) wish,
question, what will you do?? (remove extra ?)
Patricia
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
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So many times, I think, the need to pretend things are okay is a crutch because of our fear of conflict. It isn't our partner's fault, but our own. I've been a big offender of this, but I'm working on changing. It's so much better.
Not knowing were (where) it's leading, like a duck paddling from land.
to please our partners (partner's) wish,
question, what will you do?? (remove extra ?)
Patricia
Comment Written 16-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
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thanks for the comments Patricia for your review and comments
Comment from DrJane
Wonderful commentary on life, Deepwater. The soap imagery is very effective, drawing the reader into your message. Some notes: Line 4: "where" not "were"; Line 9: use a period after "wish"; Line 12: "leaving the words unspoken?"; Line 14: "God's"
Blessings,
Jane
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
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Wonderful commentary on life, Deepwater. The soap imagery is very effective, drawing the reader into your message. Some notes: Line 4: "where" not "were"; Line 9: use a period after "wish"; Line 12: "leaving the words unspoken?"; Line 14: "God's"
Blessings,
Jane
Comment Written 16-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
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thank you DrJ for the comments and review
Comment from InHisownwrite
A great piece on lies and the human factor...
love ( not knowing where it's leading like a duck paddling from land) we lie not to hurt others.... we lie to ourselves to make ourselves appear better to ourselves...
Just love the way you say it.... you make me think...
Bryan
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
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A great piece on lies and the human factor...
love ( not knowing where it's leading like a duck paddling from land) we lie not to hurt others.... we lie to ourselves to make ourselves appear better to ourselves...
Just love the way you say it.... you make me think...
Bryan
Comment Written 16-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
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thank you Bryan for the review GW
Comment from Kingsland
I an starting catch on to the way you style your poetic vogue. You are very adept at writing poetic verse. This was just an excellent piece of poetic art to have read and written a review for... John
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
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I an starting catch on to the way you style your poetic vogue. You are very adept at writing poetic verse. This was just an excellent piece of poetic art to have read and written a review for... John
Comment Written 16-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
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thank you John never started that way just ended that way, thanks for your review Gary
Comment from bowls
What a clever title! The whole truth and lie question is a hard one. I do like the way you work in the reference to soap being used as a punishment. The rhetorical questions at the end of your piece draw the reader into the conversation.
reply by the author on 18-May-2010
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What a clever title! The whole truth and lie question is a hard one. I do like the way you work in the reference to soap being used as a punishment. The rhetorical questions at the end of your piece draw the reader into the conversation.
Comment Written 18-May-2010
reply by the author on 18-May-2010
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thank you bowls for reading
Comment from Fish
There are some who revile the semicolon (;)
but they are very few. In fact, the
semicolon is a great friend to those
who write sentences which never seem to
end. I, for one, love them.
When the sentence seems so long that
you've got to add a pause or comma
and then another pause, well, it's
probably time for a semicolon.
That way no one will say, "Hey,
Mister, that's one helluva run-on
sentence you've got rambling there!"
Instead, you'll have separated or
compartmentalized your thoughtful
expressions (which go on and on)
into segments that the average reader
can gracefully read and comprehend-
hopefully!
Anyway, nice poem!
;) fish
reply by the author on 18-May-2010
|
There are some who revile the semicolon (;)
but they are very few. In fact, the
semicolon is a great friend to those
who write sentences which never seem to
end. I, for one, love them.
When the sentence seems so long that
you've got to add a pause or comma
and then another pause, well, it's
probably time for a semicolon.
That way no one will say, "Hey,
Mister, that's one helluva run-on
sentence you've got rambling there!"
Instead, you'll have separated or
compartmentalized your thoughtful
expressions (which go on and on)
into segments that the average reader
can gracefully read and comprehend-
hopefully!
Anyway, nice poem!
;) fish
Comment Written 17-May-2010
reply by the author on 18-May-2010
-
thank you Fish for reading ;
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written with good form, good flow, good meter, nice picture, a reminder to us to remember that we must lead by example and answer truthfully. good job
reply by the author on 16-May-2010
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this is very well written with good form, good flow, good meter, nice picture, a reminder to us to remember that we must lead by example and answer truthfully. good job
Comment Written 16-May-2010
reply by the author on 16-May-2010
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thank you sweet
Comment from Dom G Robles
I like the poem. I feel that some of us are really lying in some ways. We try to please somebody because we want their company or friendship. But can we really sacrifice friendship for truth? When we say something is good when it is actually bad--is this something that we can afford or are we fooling ourselves? Or are we afraid to hurt others knowing that when we do that, they will also do that to us? What is an honest opinion...? Will it work in our case...? These, I think, are some of the points brought out by the poem. And I like it from beginning to end. Dom
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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I like the poem. I feel that some of us are really lying in some ways. We try to please somebody because we want their company or friendship. But can we really sacrifice friendship for truth? When we say something is good when it is actually bad--is this something that we can afford or are we fooling ourselves? Or are we afraid to hurt others knowing that when we do that, they will also do that to us? What is an honest opinion...? Will it work in our case...? These, I think, are some of the points brought out by the poem. And I like it from beginning to end. Dom
Comment Written 14-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you Don for reading this GW
Comment from Charlene0513
To deepwater,
A short poem depicting the life which we all lead whether it be through truth or deception.
A question which many are apprehensive to express or admit to.
Some very wise and sound advice to heed.
Charlene
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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To deepwater,
A short poem depicting the life which we all lead whether it be through truth or deception.
A question which many are apprehensive to express or admit to.
Some very wise and sound advice to heed.
Charlene
Comment Written 14-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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Thank you Charlene for reading this
Comment from zmacgirl
Excellently written and your words deliver a strong clear message. I know all about the soap (and the switch. Nothing worse than having to pick your own.) If adults would just be as honest with each other as we try to teach our children to be it sure would save a lot of hassle. A nice reminder to us all.
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
|
Excellently written and your words deliver a strong clear message. I know all about the soap (and the switch. Nothing worse than having to pick your own.) If adults would just be as honest with each other as we try to teach our children to be it sure would save a lot of hassle. A nice reminder to us all.
Comment Written 14-May-2010
reply by the author on 15-May-2010
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thank you ZM for reasding