I Hereby Crown Thee ...
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "By Nightmare's Dark Decree"A collection of crowns of sonnets
115 total reviews
Comment from pickthorn
Wow, that was some nightmare. It gave me a few goosebumps, I think. This poem is well written and the rhyming is superb. Poe would be envious of your talent. A little long but well worth the read.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
Wow, that was some nightmare. It gave me a few goosebumps, I think. This poem is well written and the rhyming is superb. Poe would be envious of your talent. A little long but well worth the read.
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thank you so much, Pick :-). I'm thrilled you enjoyed the read so much!
Mike
Comment from JW
Wow. You call this a dream. It definitely sounds like a nightmare to me. Though well written, it is very dark and very intense. Reminded quite a bit of things I've read from Edgar Allen Poe.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
Wow. You call this a dream. It definitely sounds like a nightmare to me. Though well written, it is very dark and very intense. Reminded quite a bit of things I've read from Edgar Allen Poe.
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thanks so much, Jonathon :-). I've had quite a few comparisons to Poe with various of my pieces. I'm embarrassed to admit I've never read any of his work! Perhaps I should remedy that situation.
Mike
Comment from Joan E.
I admire your ambitious work and enjoyed its rhymes and circularity. Thank you for the generous currency reward as well. I particularly liked your use of the "devil's tunes" and "cardboard boulders" metaphors and alliteration to add to the intensity. The "barren dreams" and "enemies" are portrayed quite vividly and each sonnet can stand alone but make an magnificent ensemble. Brava! -Joan
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
I admire your ambitious work and enjoyed its rhymes and circularity. Thank you for the generous currency reward as well. I particularly liked your use of the "devil's tunes" and "cardboard boulders" metaphors and alliteration to add to the intensity. The "barren dreams" and "enemies" are portrayed quite vividly and each sonnet can stand alone but make an magnificent ensemble. Brava! -Joan
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thank you, Joan :-). I'm thrilled with the great response to this generally, and your wonderful review. I always try to promote high when a piece is this long, if only to show I appreciate people's time. Thanks again!
Mike
Comment from chita
Your author notes are superb-you have good imagery and a good flow with your Sonnets-rhyme well and write a compelling story about nightmares in this poem that I know that I have had a few nightmares and they are really something to go through--a superb job.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
Your author notes are superb-you have good imagery and a good flow with your Sonnets-rhyme well and write a compelling story about nightmares in this poem that I know that I have had a few nightmares and they are really something to go through--a superb job.
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thank you, Chita - I really appreciate the wonderful review and special rating :-). I'm so glad you enjoyed the read!
Mike
Comment from Thoughtician
Wow! That pretty much describes my response... it is an amazing effect that your words have on the psyche... I had to reread this amazing piece,(some parts more) so that I could take it all in. I love the imagery, the emotion, the drama that this poem exudes. It is brilliant, and with your permission, I will bookmark this for further enjoyment. Very well done. (Would have given you six stars; only had one.)
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
Wow! That pretty much describes my response... it is an amazing effect that your words have on the psyche... I had to reread this amazing piece,(some parts more) so that I could take it all in. I love the imagery, the emotion, the drama that this poem exudes. It is brilliant, and with your permission, I will bookmark this for further enjoyment. Very well done. (Would have given you six stars; only had one.)
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thank you so much, Thoughtician (love that screen name, by the way!) :-). I adore writing dark, emblematic poetry and my old recurring nightmare made the perfect subject. I'm so happy you enjoyed it!
Mike
Comment from stephenie khan
your had a very frightening dream...reminds me Edger Allen Poe...I am sorry that you had such a sense of sadness and loneliness..i have had nights like this where I would be in angish...and sweating...feeling cold...and could not sleep...very well-written...I feel the imagery..complete grief and sadness...horror
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
your had a very frightening dream...reminds me Edger Allen Poe...I am sorry that you had such a sense of sadness and loneliness..i have had nights like this where I would be in angish...and sweating...feeling cold...and could not sleep...very well-written...I feel the imagery..complete grief and sadness...horror
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thank you, Stephanie :-). This one has plagued me since I was very young, although it is much rarer these days. I attribute that reduction to all the poetic catharsis I pour into the internet! Thanks for an awesome review and the huge lift this dreary Monday morning in London.
Mike
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Fleedleflump,
Mama mia! That's some tangled nightmare! Any idea what underpins it? In my experience these things always have an underlying cause and can be dealt with if that can be brought into the open.
Great way to convey it, long, but as a "crown of sonnets," very well worth the read.
Patrick
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
Hi Fleedleflump,
Mama mia! That's some tangled nightmare! Any idea what underpins it? In my experience these things always have an underlying cause and can be dealt with if that can be brought into the open.
Great way to convey it, long, but as a "crown of sonnets," very well worth the read.
Patrick
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thanks, Patrick - I'm glad you enjoyed the read. I've been having it since I was very young, so nigh on three decades, this nightmare has endured! It's very rare these days - we're talking every few months as opposed to every other day - but still occasionally rears its head. Not a clue what causes it, but I'm certain the running theme is helplessness, which may be a clue. No obvious childhood traumas that fit the bill, or anything. Whatever the cause, it made for a good poem!
Mike :-)
Comment from Cheryl Daphine
This is excellently written. You perfectly described your view, of your night terrors. I had them as a child,my mother said it was imagination. My Grandmother taught me how to pray. That slowed them down,but they continued up into my twenties. Then my Pastor,prayed for me and rebuked the 'spirit of torment.'[thats what the bible calls 'night terrors']I haven't had any since,that has been 29 years. Very well written.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
This is excellently written. You perfectly described your view, of your night terrors. I had them as a child,my mother said it was imagination. My Grandmother taught me how to pray. That slowed them down,but they continued up into my twenties. Then my Pastor,prayed for me and rebuked the 'spirit of torment.'[thats what the bible calls 'night terrors']I haven't had any since,that has been 29 years. Very well written.
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thank you, Daph :-). I've always found that I get nightmares when I haven't written for a while. I think it's because in poetry and fiction we can express those things we can't or daren't in waking interactions. Our minds rail against that, and the thoughts come in the form of dreams. Certainly, writing plenty of poetry leaves me dream-free. This particular one has come and gone since I was very young, so perhaps it's just become a part of my personality. It's a very rare visitor in recent years.
Thanks so much for taking the time to read and share your own experiences :-)
Mike
Comment from Chrisfiore
Hiya Mike, What an achievement. This was a monumental effort that must have taken a long time to meditate on and find the appropriate words to express it. As far as length goes, I find it was a more than satisfying length. It would have been difficult to write it any other way. You set the pattern and stayed true to it throughout the piece. I enjoyed reading it. Sweet dreams. Chrisfiore
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
Hiya Mike, What an achievement. This was a monumental effort that must have taken a long time to meditate on and find the appropriate words to express it. As far as length goes, I find it was a more than satisfying length. It would have been difficult to write it any other way. You set the pattern and stayed true to it throughout the piece. I enjoyed reading it. Sweet dreams. Chrisfiore
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thank you, Chris. I wrote it during Friday lunch hour at work, then did a bit of fiddling Saturday to fix punctuation and some errant meter. I find I'll spend days thinking about a poem like this, then it'll all come pouring out in one go while my pen smokes and my notebook squeals in protest!
Thanks for a great review :-)
Mike
Comment from missy98writer
Mike,
This dark poem is smartly penned. I have several nightmares and I can relate to your great narrative in you poem. Your descriptive scheme is excellent in this poem. Your words are rich in imagery in your poem. Good juxtaposition of the art work and poem theme. You've effectively use the poetic devices of alliteration and metaphor. The lines that stood out for me: "only know those boxes on the road
are waiting for the hands that cannot move and somewhere is the boulder's fell abode where Destiny lies helpless in its groove. I shriek in fear, protective anger's fate when rolling rock's behest remains unknown and all my hope begins to dissipate as senseless visions will not be outgrown despite the years that separate their call. I am a child alone, within the thrall." You lengthy sonnet style poem is a poem I'll recommend to other reviewers. It's my pleasure to have read this poem. Thanks for sharing.
Melissa.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
Mike,
This dark poem is smartly penned. I have several nightmares and I can relate to your great narrative in you poem. Your descriptive scheme is excellent in this poem. Your words are rich in imagery in your poem. Good juxtaposition of the art work and poem theme. You've effectively use the poetic devices of alliteration and metaphor. The lines that stood out for me: "only know those boxes on the road
are waiting for the hands that cannot move and somewhere is the boulder's fell abode where Destiny lies helpless in its groove. I shriek in fear, protective anger's fate when rolling rock's behest remains unknown and all my hope begins to dissipate as senseless visions will not be outgrown despite the years that separate their call. I am a child alone, within the thrall." You lengthy sonnet style poem is a poem I'll recommend to other reviewers. It's my pleasure to have read this poem. Thanks for sharing.
Melissa.
Comment Written 17-Jul-2011
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2011
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Thank you, Melissa, for your detailed and encouraging review :-). It felt good to get this bad boy up on screen, and it made perfect fodder for a dark crown of sonnets :-)
Mike