A Murder Most Fowl
It's best to be happy with who--or what--we are...138 total reviews
Comment from Irish Rain
What a great tale in this poem, her life was actually reborn, when she died, my belief of death/life anyway...beautiful! Also loved your author notes, I didn't know crows were called a 'murder of crows'...whenever I thought of crows or ravens at all, I always thought of Stephen King's, "The Stand...Randal Flagg"...Blessings to you tonight!
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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What a great tale in this poem, her life was actually reborn, when she died, my belief of death/life anyway...beautiful! Also loved your author notes, I didn't know crows were called a 'murder of crows'...whenever I thought of crows or ravens at all, I always thought of Stephen King's, "The Stand...Randal Flagg"...Blessings to you tonight!
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much for a wonderful review and generous rating, justjo. I really appreciate it.
Comment from nomi338
The language used in this poem is so reminiscent of the phrasing used by many of the masters of poetry that it seems as if I am reading the work of some past master. You sir have a gift, it is a rare gift. Not many of us on Fanstory can write like this, I know that I certainly can not. This is just a wonderful work of poetry. Congratulations.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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The language used in this poem is so reminiscent of the phrasing used by many of the masters of poetry that it seems as if I am reading the work of some past master. You sir have a gift, it is a rare gift. Not many of us on Fanstory can write like this, I know that I certainly can not. This is just a wonderful work of poetry. Congratulations.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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Thanks, nomi338, but you sell yourself way too short. I have read many of your lovely works as well. You have immense talent.
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Thank you for saying that. I have been taught to never fall in love with anything that I write and I try to follow that as much as possible.
Comment from Fillmore Paige
Language is evocative of the scene, though somewhat melodramatic in places. I would change the title too. It hearkens of those old silent film dramas, now kitsch where the woman is tied to the tracks by the villain trying to get the deed to the ranch. There seems to be a more somber intent here.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Language is evocative of the scene, though somewhat melodramatic in places. I would change the title too. It hearkens of those old silent film dramas, now kitsch where the woman is tied to the tracks by the villain trying to get the deed to the ranch. There seems to be a more somber intent here.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Thanks for your most expert advice, Fillmore. You most certainly be an accomplished author of some repute. I will take your suggestions under advisement.
Comment from Winslow
Dear Dean,
A magical write about a raven and of its dreams but not its dying. For it returns a wiser bird to live among the crows.
Warm regards,
Winslow
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Dear Dean,
A magical write about a raven and of its dreams but not its dying. For it returns a wiser bird to live among the crows.
Warm regards,
Winslow
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thanks very much for your wonderful review and exceptional rating, Winslow. I sincerely appreciate it!
Comment from Shaun Hess
Awesome :) I thought I might suggest just one thing though!i read and got the rhythm really well, and then I came upon this "no use even trying" - if you turn it into "no use IN even trying", then it (in my opinion) flows better. I noticed it wouldn't break any rules either seeing that you were using 7 syllables in some parts of the second half of the lines. I'm glad I could make a suggestion :) and I really enjoyed the read- I actually nearly reared up after the first and second stanzas- you mention the "scorned lover" and how the character was going to jump; dying in a serene setting- really great part of the poem. Great write again :)
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Awesome :) I thought I might suggest just one thing though!i read and got the rhythm really well, and then I came upon this "no use even trying" - if you turn it into "no use IN even trying", then it (in my opinion) flows better. I noticed it wouldn't break any rules either seeing that you were using 7 syllables in some parts of the second half of the lines. I'm glad I could make a suggestion :) and I really enjoyed the read- I actually nearly reared up after the first and second stanzas- you mention the "scorned lover" and how the character was going to jump; dying in a serene setting- really great part of the poem. Great write again :)
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much for your wonderful review and excellent suggestion, Shaun. I appreciate them both, and will give your suggestion the utmost consideration.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Thanks for another outstanding poem with a purpose, giving us readers a look from the cliff and into the fall from a different set of eyes. Great job. :-)
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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Thanks for another outstanding poem with a purpose, giving us readers a look from the cliff and into the fall from a different set of eyes. Great job. :-)
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much for a wonderful review and generous rating, Ric. As always, I really appreciate it.
Comment from Ekim777
A superb blending of the rhyme scheme and the cadence. The lightness of touch belies the profundity of the content It deals no less with the confrontation of life and death and the attempt to reunify the two phenomena. I would suggest for the sake of the rhythm in the last line you insert; "...With her murder of the crows."
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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A superb blending of the rhyme scheme and the cadence. The lightness of touch belies the profundity of the content It deals no less with the confrontation of life and death and the attempt to reunify the two phenomena. I would suggest for the sake of the rhythm in the last line you insert; "...With her murder of the crows."
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thank you so much for such a glowing review and generous rating, Ekim777. I also appreciate your great suggestion and will make some alterations.
Comment from L.A.Matthies
Absolutely Fantastic, Dean! You've captured the Native American culture and the pain of a tortured soul in one fell swoop ...nothing but praise for you!!! :)Linda
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Absolutely Fantastic, Dean! You've captured the Native American culture and the pain of a tortured soul in one fell swoop ...nothing but praise for you!!! :)Linda
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much, as always, Linda. It is always such a pleasure hearing from you!
Comment from the-adventurer
Brilliant poem! This truly painted a picture in my mind. I felt the breeze on the cliff. I saw the girl leaping to her death. Personally crows are my favorite birds and I like seeing poems involving them.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Brilliant poem! This truly painted a picture in my mind. I felt the breeze on the cliff. I saw the girl leaping to her death. Personally crows are my favorite birds and I like seeing poems involving them.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thanks very much, adventurer. I am really happy that you enjoyed this one!
Ravens are my favorite bird as well, they truly get a bad rap.
Comment from country ranch writer
There was a movie here years ago I can't think of the Title based on this similar story you have posted. It is a real good story and you have done a wonderful job as per usual my friend hope all is well with you my friend
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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There was a movie here years ago I can't think of the Title based on this similar story you have posted. It is a real good story and you have done a wonderful job as per usual my friend hope all is well with you my friend
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2014
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Thank you so very much for your fabulous review, country. I have never seen the movie you mentioned, but I would certainly like to. If the title ever comes back to you, please let me know.
Thanks so much again. Be well, yourself.