Heart Crafted Poems - 2022
Viewing comments for Chapter 107 "Sweetgrass"Musings of an old man - 2022
33 total reviews
Comment from Pearl Edwards
This is a lovely free verse for the smells challenge JLR. You took me with you as you walked the dunes through the sweetgrass (is that the flowers pictured) back home to coffee. I'm enjoying my morning coffee as I read, nicely written. Cheers
Valda
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2022
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This is a lovely free verse for the smells challenge JLR. You took me with you as you walked the dunes through the sweetgrass (is that the flowers pictured) back home to coffee. I'm enjoying my morning coffee as I read, nicely written. Cheers
Valda
Comment Written 30-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2022
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Thank you, Pearl
Comment from Reese Turner
Well written observation of the, often overlooked, joys of the beach. Whether watching my kids, now, grandkids in the sand and surf while pretending not to notice the beauties in bikinis, I do appreciate the unique smells and sights of the shore.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Well written observation of the, often overlooked, joys of the beach. Whether watching my kids, now, grandkids in the sand and surf while pretending not to notice the beauties in bikinis, I do appreciate the unique smells and sights of the shore.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Thanks for the review Reese!
Comment from Terry Broxson
A very well-done poem for the club entry. I think the club should like it, good luck. The imagery of sight and sound and smell is done very well. I can see it, feel it, smell it, and taste it. Good work.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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A very well-done poem for the club entry. I think the club should like it, good luck. The imagery of sight and sound and smell is done very well. I can see it, feel it, smell it, and taste it. Good work.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Thank you Terry, hope you are having a super week!
Comment from SimianSavant
Well written and picturesque, the dankness of the beach contrasting well with what follows. The only thing I suggest changing is a redundancy that sticks out: *succulent flowering* (you said it twice! It's in both of your last two stanzas). You could change the adjectives or just eliminate from one set -- if the latter I would suggest from the first instance: *rising from the grass* since you already have the smell of vanilla there.
Thank you for the read!
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Well written and picturesque, the dankness of the beach contrasting well with what follows. The only thing I suggest changing is a redundancy that sticks out: *succulent flowering* (you said it twice! It's in both of your last two stanzas). You could change the adjectives or just eliminate from one set -- if the latter I would suggest from the first instance: *rising from the grass* since you already have the smell of vanilla there.
Thank you for the read!
Comment Written 26-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Your comment and offering is spot on, thank you~
Comment from sue133
You tickle the senses beautifully in your poem. Visually it is well presented and the sense of smell and taste are brought to life. I felt myself walking with you back for a 'hot mug of coffee.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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You tickle the senses beautifully in your poem. Visually it is well presented and the sense of smell and taste are brought to life. I felt myself walking with you back for a 'hot mug of coffee.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Sue, thanks for your review and comments.
Comment from karenina
I'm simply not proficient in free verse. Nonetheless, I know when I like it! This is a fine example of delivering the senses poetically... I am going to go off-line and practice a poem about aromas. It will likely never see the light of day, ah, but you have inspired me!
Karenina
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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I'm simply not proficient in free verse. Nonetheless, I know when I like it! This is a fine example of delivering the senses poetically... I am going to go off-line and practice a poem about aromas. It will likely never see the light of day, ah, but you have inspired me!
Karenina
Comment Written 25-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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You are so kind thank you for your review and comments.
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I'm currently working on a "practice" poem... My father's cherry-scented pipe tobacco has got me reminiscing!
Comment from Raul1
The sentences flow with clarity. It is interesting and entertaining. It's well written. I like your poem. Excellent work! No grammatical errors. I like it. Thank you for sharing! Good job!
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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The sentences flow with clarity. It is interesting and entertaining. It's well written. I like your poem. Excellent work! No grammatical errors. I like it. Thank you for sharing! Good job!
Comment Written 25-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Thanks Raul.
Comment from Artasylum
Well, I could wake up to sweet grass and sea salt floating through the air reminding me of daily rituals ahead... this was lovely and I moved into your words... thanks for the delightful romp... di
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Well, I could wake up to sweet grass and sea salt floating through the air reminding me of daily rituals ahead... this was lovely and I moved into your words... thanks for the delightful romp... di
Comment Written 25-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Di, thanks for your review and kind words.
Comment from Sugarray77
Hello Jim. I hope you are doing well and enjoying every opportunity to write your verses. Your verse is a perfect response to the prompt and makes your readers wish we could smell the sweet grass too. Great job on this.
Melissa
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Hello Jim. I hope you are doing well and enjoying every opportunity to write your verses. Your verse is a perfect response to the prompt and makes your readers wish we could smell the sweet grass too. Great job on this.
Melissa
Comment Written 25-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Hi dear friend, I AM enjoying getting back to my desk to pen words. I trust 2022 is starting out with great writing opportunities for you also.
Comment from Wendy G
You've created a beautiful poem, and your imagery, appealing to all the senses, does indeed create that vivid realism as one can picture and smell everything you describe. Well done. Thanks you for sharing.
Wendy
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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You've created a beautiful poem, and your imagery, appealing to all the senses, does indeed create that vivid realism as one can picture and smell everything you describe. Well done. Thanks you for sharing.
Wendy
Comment Written 25-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2022
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Wendy, I am always grateful for your reviews and comments, I pray your week provides you plenty of Joy.