Reviews from

Disobeyed

an essence poem

22 total reviews 
Comment from Mary Vigasin
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Congratulations! Getting recognition for a very powerful poem. Those who buck rules or society norms pay a harsh price. Smart choice of the picture to complement your words.
Best wishes
Mary

 Comment Written 27-Mar-2022


reply by the author on 27-Mar-2022
    Thank you, Mary
Comment from jaded831
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Congratulations!! I read the winners and out of the bunch although you didn't take first, I found yours the best. It was truthful, easy to understand, and relatable, all the ingredients for a great poem.

 Comment Written 26-Mar-2022


reply by the author on 26-Mar-2022
    Thank you, Jaded
Comment from dragonpoet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Bill,
These words and artwork match well. It shows that we can become almost captives of our mistakes. Disobeying rules causes us much pain in the end.
Congrats on placing second in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan

 Comment Written 25-Mar-2022


reply by the author on 25-Mar-2022
    Thank you, Joan
reply by dragonpoet on 26-Mar-2022
    You're welcome, Bill.
    Joan
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

There is much truth in these words Bill. Rules that have been tried and tested and are there for the good of everyone are often broken by foolish people, much enjoyed, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
    Thanks, Dolly
Comment from kahpot
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

ahh! this good, your internal rhyme is so very clever and the message you have packed in this little poem is powerful, very well written and presented, best wishes for your contest****kahpot

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
    Thanks, kahpot, for the excellent review. Bill
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your contest entry plus image pair nicely. I enjoyed reading your poem and agree with your words. Good job with the syllable count per line and the rhymes.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
    Thank you, Jan
Comment from BethShelby
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Nice two line poem. The rules are usually there for our protection and breaking them can often cause accidents and other serious consequences. The foolish find themselves in trouble often when they chose to break them.

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
    We have fools to prove the rule.
Comment from judiverse
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Great thought in this. You managed to get in your internal rhyme smoothly! Best of luck in the contest. Fools are inclined to disobey the rules. Maybe they just want to test the system. Great artwork choice. judi

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
    Thank you, Judi
reply by judiverse on 28-Feb-2022
    You're welcome. judi
Comment from juliaSjames
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Brilliant, Bill. I can think of adjectives to qualify "fools" but maybe you chose the wiser course.

I've tried writing essence poems and given up. Your internal rhyme of "made/disobeyed" is sheer genius.

Best of luck with the Contest Committee.

Stay safe and blessed

Julia

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
    Thank you, Julia
Comment from Dawn Munro
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Goodness, I must find more time to spend at FanStory, I must! You certainly have a talent for these tiny formats, my friend. Once again you show how it's done! Good luck with this gem.

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2022
    Thank you so much, Dawn.
reply by Dawn Munro on 26-Feb-2022
    You are welcome. :)