Comment from Rosemarie L Tharp

Exceptional

Starting from quiet, more subdued lines in the beginning, the poem crescendos like the trumpets of a battle song high above the orchestra. Through this poem we re-discover our strength and, together, we ride into battle. We are not the flickering flame that is soon to go out but the torch of eons. We are not the sand castle soon to be washed away but the mountain standing strong after innumerable besiegements of rain and wind. We are Hope and we endure... We endure.

Suffice to say: I quite like this poem. Well done and good luck on your recovery.

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2023

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reply by the author on 03-May-2023

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I apologize for the delay in response. I?m glad it came across as intended. I appreciate your time and attention. Have a wonderful day!

Comment from dellsworthpoet

Excellent

An interesting poem. The images are clear. The language is conversational. The piece stays on point.

Suggestions:

When using similes or metaphors it aids in the cohesion of the piece to have all relate to a common theme. i.e. maritime, rural, flora, etc. Otherwise, it can produce a jumpy feel.

I am the ax inside the case of glass.
I looked it up and ax is a deviant spelling of axe. The latter is more common. It may be viewed by some as a spelling error.

Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2023

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reply by the author on 03-May-2023

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I apologize for the delay in response. I appreciate the input and I hope you have a wonderful day!

reply by dellsworthpoet on 03-May-2023

You are welcome.

Comment from Julie G1

Excellent

So well written. This poem conveys the author's message succinctly. The choice of language and imagery create an apt and evocative word picture. The use of the graphic worked well for this reader. I hope you keep on writing.

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2023

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reply by the author on 03-May-2023

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I apologize for the delay in response. I?m glad it came out well and I hope you have a wonderful day!

Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Excellent

It sounds like you are the rescuer of all things here, the solution to the problem and the savour in a moment of chaos, it is good to feel heroic now and then, I enjoyed the ride here love Dolly x

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2023

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reply by the author on 03-May-2023

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I apologize for the delay in response. I actually wrote this one from Hope?s point of view, since I?m not up to saving much of anything. I?m glad it was a good ride and I hope you have a wonderful day!

Comment from Douglas Goff

Excellent

This looks s a strong piece full of bold claims of glorious redemption.

This line was sublime :
I am the warmth suffusing frostbitten hearts,

Nice work Master Poet. Reminds me of a nice fire. Hot to the touch, but of so cozy
D

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2023

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reply by the author on 24-Apr-2023

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I really appreciate it and I hope you have a wonderful day.

Comment from shelley kaye

Excellent

this was a nice poem of hope for future dreams
nice imagery and good rhyme

one suggestion i have is maybe play with line and stanza breaks a bit?

While some paint me as fragile as an autumn leaf
crunching underfoot on a wind-swept path,
I am more than the glow of a candle's flicker
or a sand-castle constructed below the tideline.

I am the ax inside the case of glass
beneath the stencil, "Break in case of emergency!"
I am the torch handed from future to present
illuminating darkness in a flood of fire.

I am the warmth suffusing frostbitten hearts,
the very essence of what it is to be alive.
Within you, I am the animus of change,
the flowing Life from which all breath comes.

I am more than the winning lottery ticket,
the card proclaiming, "Get out of jail free!"
I am the call to action, the promise of better,
coming when there is work to be done.

I do not simply tell you the grass grows greener:
I am the hose watering your own lawn.
So whether a lifeline or the hammer used
to construct the foundations of a better world:

hold me so tightly that there is no difference
between me, the calling tool, and your fingers,
for the closer Hope sits in your heart
the more room you have to grow.

I am the pull unsatisfied by half-hearted pushes.


just a few observations thought i had while reading...

thank you for sharing
shelley :)

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2023

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reply by the author on 24-Apr-2023

Thank you for reading and reviewing, I really appreciate it! I?ll have to go through and add the stanza breaks I had in the original draft. Thank you for giving it your time. I hope you have a great day.

Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Excellent

A strong verse expanding on the theme of optimism and a message of hope and encouragement to fulfil oneself as much as possible. Lovely imagery throughout to fire up the soul, enhanced by a fitting image radiating warmth and energy. Good job here! Thanks for sharing, Debbie

 Comment Written 21-Apr-2023

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reply by the author on 21-Apr-2023

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I really appreciate your and I?m glad it came out well. Have a wonderful weekend!

Comment from Evelyn Hopkins

Excellent

interesting and well-written poem! My favorite thing about this poem is the imagery; it beautifully describes the place and emotion. I also love the picture chosen to go with the poem. I hope you have a good day! :)

 Comment Written 21-Apr-2023

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reply by the author on 21-Apr-2023

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I?m glad it came out well and I appreciate your time. I hope you have a wonderful weekend!