Silent Voices
Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Hands of Mine"Verses of personification
17 total reviews
Comment from GoWiSt
Very good reading flow and rhymes.
"the peril known, yet you must ride the wave." Indeed, time's effects cannot be escaped--especially its final act to our lives.
Excelent, excellent personification of time poem--brilliantly expressed!
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Very good reading flow and rhymes.
"the peril known, yet you must ride the wave." Indeed, time's effects cannot be escaped--especially its final act to our lives.
Excelent, excellent personification of time poem--brilliantly expressed!
Comment Written 12-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Oh, this means so much to me. Thank you for your kind words and encouragement!! Xo
Comment from Janet Foor
Wonderful analogies of time and what we do with it and ultimately, time waits for no one so we should choose wisely what we do with it.
I enjoyed the read and am happy you and your family are enjoying Disney.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Wonderful analogies of time and what we do with it and ultimately, time waits for no one so we should choose wisely what we do with it.
I enjoyed the read and am happy you and your family are enjoying Disney.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 12-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Thank you, Janet. Your kind words And encouragement are always appreciated. Xoxoxo
Comment from Debra White
Hello Jessica,
I really enjoyed reading your poem.
The structure is a sound 6-6-10-6-6-10 aabccb and in perfect meter, which is so complimentary to your theme of time.
I think that you explore your theme, observing the quirks of how time passes in different ways, the certainty, yet uncertainty of it and how it affects our destiny, depending on how we spend it and the choices we make, so beautifully. The personification is wonderful and the blurred artwork works well.
Thank you for captivating me for a few moments - time well spent ;)
Best wishes, Debra
ps: Enjoy the rest of your holiday at Disney World :)
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Hello Jessica,
I really enjoyed reading your poem.
The structure is a sound 6-6-10-6-6-10 aabccb and in perfect meter, which is so complimentary to your theme of time.
I think that you explore your theme, observing the quirks of how time passes in different ways, the certainty, yet uncertainty of it and how it affects our destiny, depending on how we spend it and the choices we make, so beautifully. The personification is wonderful and the blurred artwork works well.
Thank you for captivating me for a few moments - time well spent ;)
Best wishes, Debra
ps: Enjoy the rest of your holiday at Disney World :)
Comment Written 12-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Debra, thank you for this wonderful, thorough review. It truly means so much to me. We just returned home today and had a lovely time! Xoxo
Comment from Mark Jackson
I was reading this without reading the explanation and I came to Death. Which is not far off, if you look at a picture of Father Time and Death you will be hard pushed to pick them apart. I think that is a testament to your skill as a writer. Great work.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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I was reading this without reading the explanation and I came to Death. Which is not far off, if you look at a picture of Father Time and Death you will be hard pushed to pick them apart. I think that is a testament to your skill as a writer. Great work.
Comment Written 11-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Mark, i'm honored by your review. Thank you so much.
Comment from royowen
I would prefer names on 'voices' it tends to de-personify them, like indeterminate entities that can deceive, 'And no wonder, since Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light.' 2 Corinthians 11:14. I can remember I had an accompanying voice long before understood who Christ was and the work of the cross. But the voice turned up when I was in danger, and once, quite literally saved my life. Looking back, 'it' was a benevolent, kindly entity.
Just an observation of your work Jessica. Well done, blessings Roy
Suggestion : I grant(,which) cannot last
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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I would prefer names on 'voices' it tends to de-personify them, like indeterminate entities that can deceive, 'And no wonder, since Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light.' 2 Corinthians 11:14. I can remember I had an accompanying voice long before understood who Christ was and the work of the cross. But the voice turned up when I was in danger, and once, quite literally saved my life. Looking back, 'it' was a benevolent, kindly entity.
Just an observation of your work Jessica. Well done, blessings Roy
Suggestion : I grant(,which) cannot last
Comment Written 10-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Thank you so much, Roy. Great suggestion-I will revise.
Xo
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Bless you
Comment from June Sargent
The hands of time don't stop for anyone - not even Mickey and Minnie! Enjoy your vacation. Your hands will catch up with the poetry when you get back. Great entry.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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The hands of time don't stop for anyone - not even Mickey and Minnie! Enjoy your vacation. Your hands will catch up with the poetry when you get back. Great entry.
Comment Written 10-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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June, thank you so much! This made me smile BIG! Xoxo
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Please enjoy your girls and the vacation. We'll be here when you return, and life gets back to normal. Well, something close to normal. LOL Thank you for sharing this poem with us.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Please enjoy your girls and the vacation. We'll be here when you return, and life gets back to normal. Well, something close to normal. LOL Thank you for sharing this poem with us.
Comment Written 10-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Lol thank you so much, my friend! Xoxo
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written poem about the silent voices. You did a great job on the verses of personification. You used very good descriptive words and great imagery. I hope you all have a great time in Disney World! love and blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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This is a very well written poem about the silent voices. You did a great job on the verses of personification. You used very good descriptive words and great imagery. I hope you all have a great time in Disney World! love and blessings, Teri
Comment Written 10-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Teri, thank you so much for your kind words!! Xoxo
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem, Hands of Mine, presented with four distinctly rhymed and metered sestets, personifies time and shares the truth of its path through our lives. Time waits for no one.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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This poem, Hands of Mine, presented with four distinctly rhymed and metered sestets, personifies time and shares the truth of its path through our lives. Time waits for no one.
Comment Written 10-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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So very true, Bill. Thank you so much!
Comment from Jim Wile
A beautiful poem about relentless, implacable time, and no matter how we perceive it, it just does what it does. We may perceive it to move swiftly or slowly according to our circumstances, and it may seem like a friend or an enemy at times, but those are our perceptions which don't reflect time's true nature; it just travels at one speed, and it's up to us not to waste it by willing it to last longer or wishing it to slow down, but to make the most of what we are naturally granted.
I loved your very consistent iambic 3-3-5 beat pattern and your aabccb rhyming pattern. Both make for a beautiful-sounding poem, Jess. Very well done. - Jim
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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A beautiful poem about relentless, implacable time, and no matter how we perceive it, it just does what it does. We may perceive it to move swiftly or slowly according to our circumstances, and it may seem like a friend or an enemy at times, but those are our perceptions which don't reflect time's true nature; it just travels at one speed, and it's up to us not to waste it by willing it to last longer or wishing it to slow down, but to make the most of what we are naturally granted.
I loved your very consistent iambic 3-3-5 beat pattern and your aabccb rhyming pattern. Both make for a beautiful-sounding poem, Jess. Very well done. - Jim
Comment Written 10-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2024
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Jim, I appreciate you so much! Thank you for this review. Xoxo