The Killer
Free Verse - Story Poem44 total reviews
Comment from Jade Lawson
Lol, this one. Lot of suspense and then it was just an insect, entertaining indeed and it took me into a journey, lots of imagery. However it can also be associated with other things in life, even though here you describe the killing of an insect.
Good flow and word choice to enhance the descriptions and suspense.
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2013
Lol, this one. Lot of suspense and then it was just an insect, entertaining indeed and it took me into a journey, lots of imagery. However it can also be associated with other things in life, even though here you describe the killing of an insect.
Good flow and word choice to enhance the descriptions and suspense.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2013
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LOL that means I gothca. Hehe it's okay, I got everyone. LOL.
Comment from barkingdog
Well, you had me going with this one. LOL I hate it too when a fly or mosquito gets inside. It does turn me into a murderer without a second thought.
Nicely done!
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2013
Well, you had me going with this one. LOL I hate it too when a fly or mosquito gets inside. It does turn me into a murderer without a second thought.
Nicely done!
Comment Written 04-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2013
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LOL it's a built in conditioning I think. lOL
Comment from lorijean
You had me going there I thought you were about to commit murder, very funny, but they can be annoying, glad you got in the end.......
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
You had me going there I thought you were about to commit murder, very funny, but they can be annoying, glad you got in the end.......
Comment Written 03-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
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LOL thanks Lori. Just a bit of fun.
Comment from Janice Canerdy
I've seen souvenir t-shirts from Mississippi (my state) picturing a gigantic mosquito saying "PLease send more tourists. The last ones were delicious!" I really enjoyed this suspense-filled narrative poem about the well-deserved murder of an evil being.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
I've seen souvenir t-shirts from Mississippi (my state) picturing a gigantic mosquito saying "PLease send more tourists. The last ones were delicious!" I really enjoyed this suspense-filled narrative poem about the well-deserved murder of an evil being.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
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LOL we got 'im girl. LOL Thanks for helping me out.
Comment from Sanku
Oh! Gungalo i dont think i will forgive you for make me feel like a fool! .i was holding my breath as i read waiting for the last action ,fearing the man would hurt her .but in the end a mosquito! i am glad it was not April first .the prose poem was intense and dramatic.a good change of theme.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
Oh! Gungalo i dont think i will forgive you for make me feel like a fool! .i was holding my breath as i read waiting for the last action ,fearing the man would hurt her .but in the end a mosquito! i am glad it was not April first .the prose poem was intense and dramatic.a good change of theme.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
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LOL Sanku forgive me please. Only a change of pace write. Hahah.
Comment from Maguy Daoud
A very big move from the romantic poem to the criminal ones, maybe she suffered a lot from him, maybe he cheat on her, she could not support his behavior, but with all that she has not the right to kill a soul, she must let him go, because of that action, she loses her life. I'm against killing in all their ways. No! No! No!
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
A very big move from the romantic poem to the criminal ones, maybe she suffered a lot from him, maybe he cheat on her, she could not support his behavior, but with all that she has not the right to kill a soul, she must let him go, because of that action, she loses her life. I'm against killing in all their ways. No! No! No!
Comment Written 03-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
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It was a mosquito Maguy. And a fun write too. LOL.
Comment from alexgeorge
This one reminds me of 'Edward Scissor Hands'. I think there was a Morticia-type girl in that movie that looks like the one in the picture. The end justifies the means as she plots his death and finds release...
Wicked, wicked Goth girl, the blood-sucking vampire mosquito never saw it coming.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
This one reminds me of 'Edward Scissor Hands'. I think there was a Morticia-type girl in that movie that looks like the one in the picture. The end justifies the means as she plots his death and finds release...
Wicked, wicked Goth girl, the blood-sucking vampire mosquito never saw it coming.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
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LOL Alex, good review from you. I like it.
Comment from Clipper962
Heheh. That was exciting to read, and the end is
Hilarious. You keep it very intensive . She swatted the
Biggest mosquito ever. So fun to read.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
Heheh. That was exciting to read, and the end is
Hilarious. You keep it very intensive . She swatted the
Biggest mosquito ever. So fun to read.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2013
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Thanks Clipper and so glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from amada
I knew there was a catch line somewhere, but to wait for the punch till the last line was nervy, I read it so fast, as starving for a sandwich. Wow, you know how to build up a scene!
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2013
I knew there was a catch line somewhere, but to wait for the punch till the last line was nervy, I read it so fast, as starving for a sandwich. Wow, you know how to build up a scene!
Comment Written 02-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2013
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LOL Amada!! Thanks girl for a great review.
Comment from MumEsGirl
Naughty girl, I really thought you had changed your style to chill the readers. You succeeded but you punchline certainly had me drinking my tears. the victim never stood a chance
hugs
kate
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2013
Naughty girl, I really thought you had changed your style to chill the readers. You succeeded but you punchline certainly had me drinking my tears. the victim never stood a chance
hugs
kate
Comment Written 02-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2013
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Thanks so much Kate for a super review.