Point of View
Everthing is a matter of perspective17 total reviews
Comment from comanalbert
She may be lots of things,even a man eater, but fat she's not-the photo(where from do you get them?).Doesn't matter where this one came from, it is still great(as the photo)...
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
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She may be lots of things,even a man eater, but fat she's not-the photo(where from do you get them?).Doesn't matter where this one came from, it is still great(as the photo)...
Comment Written 29-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
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Thank you very much.
Comment from judiverse
Denial seems to be the name of the game. My uncle's excuse when he got drunk at Christmas one year was that someone had given him the whiskey for a gift, and what was he to do but drink it all. People have to eat in order to live, as the narrator says. Her inner voice shames her and appeals to her insecurities. Great way of showing the narrator's feelings. I liked the ending. judi
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
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Denial seems to be the name of the game. My uncle's excuse when he got drunk at Christmas one year was that someone had given him the whiskey for a gift, and what was he to do but drink it all. People have to eat in order to live, as the narrator says. Her inner voice shames her and appeals to her insecurities. Great way of showing the narrator's feelings. I liked the ending. judi
Comment Written 29-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2014
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Thank you very much.
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You're so welcome. lancellot. judi
Comment from Marillion
I think it IS important, and I think you used an economy of words to say a lot. Very well said, with a very satisfying ending.
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I think it IS important, and I think you used an economy of words to say a lot. Very well said, with a very satisfying ending.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
Comment from N.K. Wagner
Yes, this is important. Children are taught to see themselves through others' eyes. Your protagonist's self-perception is negative because that's what her experience has taught her to believe: she's fat, ugly and unlovable. That she can distinguish her warped self-perception from reality and distance herself from it shows that it's less firmly entrenched than is usual in women who suffer this way. She probably can turn this around. :) nancy
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Yes, this is important. Children are taught to see themselves through others' eyes. Your protagonist's self-perception is negative because that's what her experience has taught her to believe: she's fat, ugly and unlovable. That she can distinguish her warped self-perception from reality and distance herself from it shows that it's less firmly entrenched than is usual in women who suffer this way. She probably can turn this around. :) nancy
Comment Written 28-Jan-2014
Comment from Cycler
This is very good - excellent! The voices ... yeah, they come at us from many directions, some times - and from many places.
Your essay with a woman main character is somewhat typical - though you told it well with the two voices. It certainly is not easy to talk that voice out of our minds. I think you expressed those conditions very well.
And, of course, the concluding statement is great. Nice job.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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This is very good - excellent! The voices ... yeah, they come at us from many directions, some times - and from many places.
Your essay with a woman main character is somewhat typical - though you told it well with the two voices. It certainly is not easy to talk that voice out of our minds. I think you expressed those conditions very well.
And, of course, the concluding statement is great. Nice job.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you very much. I appreciate the great review.
Comment from Paddywack
I like it - it's a worthwhile subject and an interesting treatment. I do think it's a bit short, though. A little longer, and the message would be more powerful. I would add the character's name into the story. e.g.:
'Why are you so fat, (Dianna)?
Add emphasis:
"I'm not (fat). I'm normal."
"You're the pig(gy) that ate (a whole) chicken breast last night, aren't you?"
Only I care about you.
The ending is a bit abrupt. Perhaps you could play on the fact that a mirror image doesn't represent the real person (the image is inverted. Left is right and right is left)
Thanks for sharing
Paddy
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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I like it - it's a worthwhile subject and an interesting treatment. I do think it's a bit short, though. A little longer, and the message would be more powerful. I would add the character's name into the story. e.g.:
'Why are you so fat, (Dianna)?
Add emphasis:
"I'm not (fat). I'm normal."
"You're the pig(gy) that ate (a whole) chicken breast last night, aren't you?"
Only I care about you.
The ending is a bit abrupt. Perhaps you could play on the fact that a mirror image doesn't represent the real person (the image is inverted. Left is right and right is left)
Thanks for sharing
Paddy
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you, Paddy. We were thinking along the same lines. I chose not to add her name on purpose, (that way she could be any woman)
I did not want to keep repeating fat. once seemed enough and it was in the beginning, so the reader knew, that also coupled with the image.
At first I write a whole chicken breast, they are small so I made it two.
Yeah, I thought about the mirror thing, but I didn't want to overly focus the mirror, mirror on the wall thing.
Thank you for the great review.
Comment from STEPHEN A CARTER
Consider:
"Everthing is a matter of perspective EVERYTHING
We all have to face our inner demons and the outer shell that covers them up. Since ancient times, mirrors have not changed, only we do if so inspired. Well done.
"Oh mirror on the wall,
Who's the fairest one of all?"
Sound familiar?
Regards:
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Consider:
"Everthing is a matter of perspective EVERYTHING
We all have to face our inner demons and the outer shell that covers them up. Since ancient times, mirrors have not changed, only we do if so inspired. Well done.
"Oh mirror on the wall,
Who's the fairest one of all?"
Sound familiar?
Regards:
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you very much
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Dear lancellot: Well deserved. So nice to hear from you again. Jusr posted 'The Well'. Thanks.
Cheers: Steve C
Comment from Green Lake Girl
This quick insight to anorexia is very interesting and seems very real. How awful to have voices in your head telling you awful things. You did a very good job of conveying your message in such an economy of words.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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This quick insight to anorexia is very interesting and seems very real. How awful to have voices in your head telling you awful things. You did a very good job of conveying your message in such an economy of words.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you very much. I didn't want to overdo it.
Comment from Aaron James
You're right it is important to get these thoughts down. If your perception helps to heal one sufferer in a similar situation then it was a worthwhile exercise, right?
I enjoyed the dialogue with self, it had a feel of reality, though I have never personally experienced such a situation. Let's say it's how I imagine such things work based on speaking with people who have suffered in this way.
I have no suggestions for any improvement and particularly liked the close. it was concise and almost invites the reader to take action to make a change.
Regards
Aaron
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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You're right it is important to get these thoughts down. If your perception helps to heal one sufferer in a similar situation then it was a worthwhile exercise, right?
I enjoyed the dialogue with self, it had a feel of reality, though I have never personally experienced such a situation. Let's say it's how I imagine such things work based on speaking with people who have suffered in this way.
I have no suggestions for any improvement and particularly liked the close. it was concise and almost invites the reader to take action to make a change.
Regards
Aaron
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you very much, Aaron.
Comment from lakeport
Point of view, Indeed the mirror does not lie, if only loosing weight were as easy as gaining,I enjoyed reading the story,God bless you.Lakeport.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Point of view, Indeed the mirror does not lie, if only loosing weight were as easy as gaining,I enjoyed reading the story,God bless you.Lakeport.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you, Lakeport
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your welcome.
could you please review me poem " True Paradice" thank you.lakeport.
