Hurricane Sandy
Appearances are deceiving10 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
Wow, this is quite a dramatic story. After her little performance for the cops,I can see why Joe has no interest in hiring Sandy. How could he ever trust her? And will she really get away with it after the cops gather all the evidence?
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Wow, this is quite a dramatic story. After her little performance for the cops,I can see why Joe has no interest in hiring Sandy. How could he ever trust her? And will she really get away with it after the cops gather all the evidence?
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Thank you. My characters get complicated, and I tried to show how Sandy's foundation carved out a survival instinct that was deeply flawed. Thanks for reading.
Comment from Mahogany Bleu
Very well done. Nice detailing, a good amount of tension, vivid characters. I would like to know a little more about Joe aside from his drinking and carousing. Sandy is one cold customer. Very enjoyable read.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Very well done. Nice detailing, a good amount of tension, vivid characters. I would like to know a little more about Joe aside from his drinking and carousing. Sandy is one cold customer. Very enjoyable read.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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You've pointed out a really important point about characters. Once a writer assigns a name to the person, the reader's curiosity is aroused. Rob is actually a utility player, I need him to add substance to the abuse and obviously he's the final victim, but is not pivotal to the plot. Glad you enjoyed the read. Thanks for the review.
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Thank you for the information about a utility player. I can appreciate Joe's role much more. I can't wait to read more of your pieces.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Wow! What a story. I enjoyed reading it. It was suspenseful and well written. I have a hard job decing who should get my vote, there is another story in the contest that is as good as yours. I will have to give it some thought. Excellent job!
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Wow! What a story. I enjoyed reading it. It was suspenseful and well written. I have a hard job decing who should get my vote, there is another story in the contest that is as good as yours. I will have to give it some thought. Excellent job!
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Sincere thanks for the bouquet of stars, just the thing to cheer up on a rainy weekend. Being torn between stories is a great indication that writers are scaling the wall of excellence. I feel honoured to have your consideration.
Comment from ellie6
Well written story that holds on to the suspense. I get the feeling that Sandy will just find another man who abuses her. It wont be Joe, as he is too much of a good person, and Sandy only chooses nasty men.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Well written story that holds on to the suspense. I get the feeling that Sandy will just find another man who abuses her. It wont be Joe, as he is too much of a good person, and Sandy only chooses nasty men.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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The tragedy is that many girls who were abused find kindness boring, and become addicted to the drama, repeating generational abuse by becoming abusers themselves. Thanks for the read.
Comment from BeasPeas
I found this to be a very interesting story. Reader wonders how things will turn out. Realistic dialogue and detail. Mysterious right to the end. Good job. Marilyn
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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I found this to be a very interesting story. Reader wonders how things will turn out. Realistic dialogue and detail. Mysterious right to the end. Good job. Marilyn
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Thank you very much.
Comment from justafan
I like most who started this read felt the pain and suffering of Sandy and the compassion of Joe, but that all changed towards the end. I agree with Joe, he was used. All the humanity had been beaten out of Sandy.
You have my vote.
Always justafan,
Missy
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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I like most who started this read felt the pain and suffering of Sandy and the compassion of Joe, but that all changed towards the end. I agree with Joe, he was used. All the humanity had been beaten out of Sandy.
You have my vote.
Always justafan,
Missy
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Thank you very much. It is always a temptation to make the abused woman a total victim to gain reader sympathy, but I hoped to show both her tragedy and also how a person begins to develop survival skills, and how the lack if a core foundation can lead to a lifetime of bad decisions. Thanks so much for the vote.
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Your most welcome.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, mystery writer, the academy award goes to.....sandy the killer waitress who set up her friend to back her up when she killed her man. on action news at 11:00. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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this is an excellent write, mystery writer, the academy award goes to.....sandy the killer waitress who set up her friend to back her up when she killed her man. on action news at 11:00. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Thanks so much for the read and review.
Comment from Lesley Collier
A very interesting story of a woman working in a cafe who is being abused by her husband. The owner feels bad for her as she has been treated badly all her life and offers his help and advice in every way he can in order to get her to leave her husband. After another one of her husbands attacks she shows up at the diner in the wee hours of the morning calmly stating that she had killed her husband by stabbing him and asks the owner to back her alibi of being at the diner all night. The police finally arrive at her house and eventually at the diner. The owner supports her in her alibi all the time feeling he was being used and before they take her to the station for questioning she asks him if he would take her on for the job he had offered her in the past but after seeing her pathetic acting and feeling used he declines, turning his back on her and walking away from the whole scenario. Well written with a lesson to be learned to the many people in this situation!
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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A very interesting story of a woman working in a cafe who is being abused by her husband. The owner feels bad for her as she has been treated badly all her life and offers his help and advice in every way he can in order to get her to leave her husband. After another one of her husbands attacks she shows up at the diner in the wee hours of the morning calmly stating that she had killed her husband by stabbing him and asks the owner to back her alibi of being at the diner all night. The police finally arrive at her house and eventually at the diner. The owner supports her in her alibi all the time feeling he was being used and before they take her to the station for questioning she asks him if he would take her on for the job he had offered her in the past but after seeing her pathetic acting and feeling used he declines, turning his back on her and walking away from the whole scenario. Well written with a lesson to be learned to the many people in this situation!
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Thanks so much for the stars and review. I appreciate the extra dazzler, especially since it is pouring rain outside.
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Her story was believable about murdering her abuser, as self-defense, until she said she had a shower. Then that changed the whole tale to very predictable from that point to its conclusion. Easy to see why Joe turned against her once he figured out that the murder was a crime, not self defense, and he lost all of his former concern for her well being.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Her story was believable about murdering her abuser, as self-defense, until she said she had a shower. Then that changed the whole tale to very predictable from that point to its conclusion. Easy to see why Joe turned against her once he figured out that the murder was a crime, not self defense, and he lost all of his former concern for her well being.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Thank you very much.
Comment from Dean Kuch
"...but inevitablyshe's she'd show up at the diner in the wee hours of the morning."..........I believe you meant to write "she'd" show up...
"Joe could not fathom how anyone could kill a man and calmly wash the blood off their hands.".............I could...imagine it, I mean. Jodi Arias did the exact same thing after murdering her boyfriend, Travis Alexander, while he took a shower. Sometimes truth is really stranger than fiction. If you're not familiar with the case, Google it. It'll blow your mind what some women are capable of.
Well, I would say based on Joe's reaction to Sandy's query about the job offer that he's definitely lost any compassion for the woman he once had. I'm surprised he didn't give her up rather than put his own reputation and life on the line the way he did.
I know I would have in a heartbeat.
Great story, very well plotted. The dialogue between Joe and Sandy was realistic and read genuine. Other than the one minor error I made note of, I saw absolutely nothing I would change.
Best of luck to you in the contest. ~Dean
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2015
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"...but inevitably
"Joe could not fathom how anyone could kill a man and calmly wash the blood off their hands.".............I could...imagine it, I mean. Jodi Arias did the exact same thing after murdering her boyfriend, Travis Alexander, while he took a shower. Sometimes truth is really stranger than fiction. If you're not familiar with the case, Google it. It'll blow your mind what some women are capable of.
Well, I would say based on Joe's reaction to Sandy's query about the job offer that he's definitely lost any compassion for the woman he once had. I'm surprised he didn't give her up rather than put his own reputation and life on the line the way he did.
I know I would have in a heartbeat.
Great story, very well plotted. The dialogue between Joe and Sandy was realistic and read genuine. Other than the one minor error I made note of, I saw absolutely nothing I would change.
Best of luck to you in the contest. ~Dean
Comment Written 27-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2015
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Thanks so much for the spag alert and also the redirect to some gory murders.
BTW...check out the forum. It seems you disappeared for five days and members sent out a search party for you.
I appreciate the review.
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The pleasure was all mine. I was in the hospital for a few days. My damn defibrillator decided to knock me on my keister. I just gotta take it easy, is all.
Good luck.
