Reviews from

2015 Haiku

Viewing comments for Chapter 44 "Haiku Suite (Lavender Bush)"
A collection of haiku I wrote in 2015

11 total reviews 
Comment from Jackarrie
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This is a very good haiku suite about how the plants is so welcome in the city, otherwise we would have a concrete jungle. I love the last one about the plant refusing death, this is used at times as an example for people to realise if the plant can survive in these alien conditions, then so can I.

Well done, Gypsy good luck in the contest
Mary

 Comment Written 31-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 31-Aug-2015
    Thank you Mary, I appreciate your generous review :)
Comment from Gloria ....
Excellent
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Gypsy this is good haiku about the city/nature. I'm quite impressed with how well this series worked with the contest prompt.

Excellent concrete imagery, and I love your pun with that. Good satori lines, and overall a nicely written haiku suite.

Gloria

 Comment Written 30-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 30-Aug-2015
    Thank you Gloria :)
Comment from w.j.debi
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This is a very nice suite of verse. I like how you carry the theme throughout all three verses. Excellent imagery in and tie in with
Life sentence
Reincarnation
And
Refusing death


Best of luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 30-Aug-2015
    Thank you wjdebi :)
Comment from lightink
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Absolutely fantastic haiku series about nature slowly taking back it's ground. I wish I had a sixer left to honor this piece with! Thank you for writing this!

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 30-Aug-2015
    Thank you lightink :)
Comment from BeasPeas
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A nicely described lament of nature co-existing with urban life. City dwellers revel in those charming green spaces left to enjoy. I particularly like "grass refuses death." Marilyn/BeasPeas

 Comment Written 29-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 30-Aug-2015
    Thank you Marilyn :)
Comment from rspoet
Excellent
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This is a very fine haiku suite for the city contest
Each is excellent as a separate haiku
meeting all requirements
Very solid concrete imagery
grammatically connected
Excellent satori lines that relate to the human element
All in present tense
All contrast nature to life in the city
and form a unified whole
The suite is very well done
Good luck in the contest

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 28-Aug-2015
    thank you rspoet :)
Comment from Tengiwe Grace
Excellent
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A lot of skill demonstrated in the manner in which you have met the challenge of the requirements in forms. Fresh, emotive and expressive. Fantastic!

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
    I don't understand, if you think it was skillful, fresh, fantastic... met the requirements.... why did you give me a 4 star/good?
reply by Tengiwe Grace on 27-Aug-2015
    My apologies! It is all of the above. And very good I obviously don't understand the scoring system. I am so new to the site. Easy to place a score than to provide heart felt feedback. So again sorry my comment expresses how I feel
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
    No worries, I did the same when I was new. Yes so you know, the norm is 5 stars unless there is something wrong with the poem, then you cut it down to four and you should explain why you docked one star down. Here, on FS, we can learn a lot from each other by reviewing constructive criticism. Also, there is a way to go back and change your score, so if you think all those good things about me poem, you can go back and change the score and save again. The same goes for you, you should expect 5 stars unless something is wrong, so ask why. Good luck and don't hesitate to contact me if you have a question about the site. :) cheers
Comment from Tessa Kay
Excellent
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I have a lot of nature peek-a-boo in our footpath around the house.
Had to smile. I would've never called it that. Very original.
Also like the life sentence for the lavender. Clever.
:) Tessa

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
    Thank you Tessa :)
Comment from Domino 2
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I really like this connected haiku suite.

The poor lavender bush taken out of its natural environment and 'caged' in a city apartment.

And the grass that seems able to sprout anywhere it pleases. Sometimes we take it for granted, and forget its a plant we'd sorely miss if it weren't abundant.

Good luck and best wishes, Ray.


 Comment Written 27-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
    Thank you Ray :)
Comment from TAB_that's me
Excellent
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I like all of these. Each one is done in perfect haiku form. I like the way you brought some nature into your city haiku.

Good luck in the contest.

Teresa

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 Comment Written 27-Aug-2015

reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
    Thank you Teresa :)