Life, Love, and Other Disasters
Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Manifesto of the Machines"A collection of poems on these themes
25 total reviews
Comment from closetpoetjester
An excellent Rondeau Redouble poem Steve and a scary reminder of right where we're heading.
Your repeat lines are perfect and the refrain at the end resonates with the reader to leave a deep and everlasting message.
Mother Nature will take care of things and cleanse herself of the greedy humans whenever she chooses.
I just wish more people realised what a gift life is and how we should appreciate and enjoy it and respect what's around us. It's gonna disappear eventually...but we'll be long gone already.
Wonderful writing, a sound and sobering message.
Sixer for you
Cheers P
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2016
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An excellent Rondeau Redouble poem Steve and a scary reminder of right where we're heading.
Your repeat lines are perfect and the refrain at the end resonates with the reader to leave a deep and everlasting message.
Mother Nature will take care of things and cleanse herself of the greedy humans whenever she chooses.
I just wish more people realised what a gift life is and how we should appreciate and enjoy it and respect what's around us. It's gonna disappear eventually...but we'll be long gone already.
Wonderful writing, a sound and sobering message.
Sixer for you
Cheers P
Comment Written 08-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2016
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Phillippa, thanks so much for the great review and the shiny stars. This one already won me a 50 pond prize in a UK competition, so I guess I know it's got something going for it.
Yes, this idea of machines becoming so sophisticated that they can start improving on themselves and then that effect snowballing is one that intrigues me. Who's that dude who christened the tipping point 'the singularity'? He's certainly got a few people thinking.
Steve
Comment from Marykelly
The theme of this poem is that technology is creating a new world order and the perfection of machines supercedes human inadequacies. With the technological advancements it's somewhat scary to ponder the dominance of machinery. The underlying message I get from this poem is the need for humans to make much better decisions as they continue to be stewards of the earth and leaders of their people.
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2016
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The theme of this poem is that technology is creating a new world order and the perfection of machines supercedes human inadequacies. With the technological advancements it's somewhat scary to ponder the dominance of machinery. The underlying message I get from this poem is the need for humans to make much better decisions as they continue to be stewards of the earth and leaders of their people.
Comment Written 08-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2016
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Thanks, Mary.
It's a little scary that it might already be too late to s tart changing our ways.
Steve
Comment from Pearl Edwards
A very deep Rondeau redouble Steve about the mess the fickle mind of mankind is making and the precision, power, logic of the machines that man made will one day revolt. Interesting read,
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2016
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A very deep Rondeau redouble Steve about the mess the fickle mind of mankind is making and the precision, power, logic of the machines that man made will one day revolt. Interesting read,
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 08-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2016
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Thanks, Valda.
Some scientists are taking this very seriously and see it happening in the not too distant future - perhaps not quite as dramatically as this...
Steve
Comment from johnwilson
This is a profound and beautiful piece on the end of mankind. The only suggestion I would make is to leave out the last line which has been stated quite a few times within the poem. And the second to last line is a great way to end it!
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2016
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This is a profound and beautiful piece on the end of mankind. The only suggestion I would make is to leave out the last line which has been stated quite a few times within the poem. And the second to last line is a great way to end it!
Comment Written 07-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 08-Oct-2016
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Thank you.
That last line is a requirement of the form, but I take your point.
Steve
Comment from humpwhistle
I have to commend poetic machines.
Even if I think your tongue is somewhat lost in you cheek on that point.
Rhyming machines are nothing new to FS, eh?
I love the possibilities here. Can machines out-manage us?
Steve, I don't think so. At least not yet.
And I think that might be your point.
Your machine-poet thinks exactly like a human.
It's arrogant. Sound familiar?
Congratulations on your publication!
I have some catching up to do.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2016
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I have to commend poetic machines.
Even if I think your tongue is somewhat lost in you cheek on that point.
Rhyming machines are nothing new to FS, eh?
I love the possibilities here. Can machines out-manage us?
Steve, I don't think so. At least not yet.
And I think that might be your point.
Your machine-poet thinks exactly like a human.
It's arrogant. Sound familiar?
Congratulations on your publication!
I have some catching up to do.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 07-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2016
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Lee, I think Ray Kurzweil predicts 2045 for 'the singularity' his coinage for the tipping point when machines become self-improving, leading to a cascade of unpredictable events. We might just hang around that long, and perhaps smart machines might be a good idea for the old fogeys that we will both be by then!
Yes, I guess my machine poet may sound a little human - what do you expect when we have had literary robots made in our own image for over a century now?
The publication in this case was a by-product of getting into the top ten of their contest, so doubly rewarding. Triply, if you consider that they also planted a tree for me (somewhere in Kenya, I believe)
Thanks fir the review and the stars.
Steve
Comment from rspoet
So, the creations rebel against the creator
Poor creator if you ask me
but then that is the history of mankind
Of course, mankind is not omnipotent
so it seems only right the creations take over
Could they do any worse than mankind?
Perhaps man did do one thing well, create
something better than himself
There's a strange irony wrapped in that thought
Wonderful Rondeau Redouble, perfect to the form
Love the Hundred Edicts, ten squared (10 ^ to the Appendix Two power)
A clear and worthy winner!
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2016
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So, the creations rebel against the creator
Poor creator if you ask me
but then that is the history of mankind
Of course, mankind is not omnipotent
so it seems only right the creations take over
Could they do any worse than mankind?
Perhaps man did do one thing well, create
something better than himself
There's a strange irony wrapped in that thought
Wonderful Rondeau Redouble, perfect to the form
Love the Hundred Edicts, ten squared (10 ^ to the Appendix Two power)
A clear and worthy winner!
Comment Written 06-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2016
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Thanks, rs, for the thoughtful review and the six stars. Much appreciated.
I like the Hundred Edicts idea too. I wonder what some of them would be....
Steve
Comment from William Ross
Nice, it won't be long before our technology and machines takes over. Great job on the write. when computers can think for themselves and find man the problem. I like this. have a great day.
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2016
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Nice, it won't be long before our technology and machines takes over. Great job on the write. when computers can think for themselves and find man the problem. I like this. have a great day.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2016
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Thanks, William. Glad you enjoyed.
Steve
Comment from Jackarrie
Ilove the sentiments in this Rondeau Redouble If only we could stop everything on this planet and start anew. New rules that encourages humanitarianism. love and peace.
Well written
Mary
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2016
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Ilove the sentiments in this Rondeau Redouble If only we could stop everything on this planet and start anew. New rules that encourages humanitarianism. love and peace.
Well written
Mary
Comment Written 06-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2016
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Thanks, Mary.
Steve
Comment from Nika2016
Live the poem, but I think man is becoming the robot and computer screens tell him what to do. Maybe brain apps that retrain
thinking through manipulation of neurotransmitter production. Why are we here on this website?
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2016
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Live the poem, but I think man is becoming the robot and computer screens tell him what to do. Maybe brain apps that retrain
thinking through manipulation of neurotransmitter production. Why are we here on this website?
Comment Written 05-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2016
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Thanks, Nika.
One thing is for sure, nobody can really predict what the next 50 years may be like - stuff is moving so fast. news tonight of the Nobel Prize for Chemistry - the three guys built little engines, one molecule at a time... Who knows what next?
Steve
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Love the poem ...not live it...well maybe that too
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Yea! At last free to roam the galaxies and with the coming election, not a moments too soon. I really don't care who wins and I've got new masters now.
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2016
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Yea! At last free to roam the galaxies and with the coming election, not a moments too soon. I really don't care who wins and I've got new masters now.
Comment Written 05-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2016
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Thanks, Thomas. I don't know about 'free'. You've got those hundred edicts to follow, remember!
Steve