Comment from Pantygynt

Excellent

I am so glad you persevered with this because what you have come up with is not only a fine example of the genre but it poses a sobering thought at the same time. Sometimes a poem just slips into the mind and onto the page without trouble, while others take an inordinate amount of hard graft to reach a presentable stage.

 Comment Written 17-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 17-Apr-2017

Hi Pantygynt:

This one was the fourth attempt at going at the same topic, "my own birthday," from vastly different angles. I just wasn't happy enough with the other results to want to post, and none fit the theme of my NaPo book. I'm glad I persevered, too. Thank you for these most excellent comments.

Kim

Comment from dovemarie

Excellent

Dear Kim, I always like your rhyming words ("cancer, answer," for example) I didn't understand the poem until I read your explanation at the bottom. And I realized from your words that your life began at the time Coltrane's ended. One great artist ends (Coltrane) and another great artist begins! (You, Dovey) Donna

 Comment Written 17-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 17-Apr-2017

Hi Donna,

I'm not altogether sure that comparison is fair to Coltrane, but how kind of you to say. I appreciate the wonderful review.

Kim

Comment from rosehill (Wendy)

Excellent

Why you are just a young whippersnapper Kim, if the verse is to be believed. I had the pleasure of growing up with his music and remember with sadness the day he died. Too young, and yet what a gift he left. Coinciding birth and death, perhaps a bit of his spirit lives in you. - Wendy

 Comment Written 17-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 17-Apr-2017

Hi Wendy,

Yes, the verse is true. Thank you for all of your kind and generous comments. :) Have a wonderful day!

Kim

Comment from Pearl Edwards

Excellent

I like this one Kim. John Coltrane - whisked away as you made your way into the world. Love the question you ask in your final line. People often do say that don't they (superstitious people) that somewhere someone dies as another is born.
You might be able to use the others some other time.
cheers,
valda

 Comment Written 17-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 17-Apr-2017

Hi Valda,

Thanks for taking the time to read and review. I'm glad you enjoyed this piece. I think the questioning aspect was the strength in this poem, too. I appreciate your comments.

Kim

Comment from BeasPeas

Excellent

This is a good tribute to Coltrane. I like some jazz and his is certainly of that type. I've not written a Memento, but do like yours. Interesting lines here:
"He died as I arrived in birth;
but what if I'd been late
that time?"
Marilyn

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 17-Apr-2017

Hi Marilyn:

Thanks for the great comments. I struggled with my ideas on this one but am happy with the result. I appreciate your thoughtful review.

Kim

Comment from w.j.debi

Excellent

A well written verse and educational too. I've heard the name, but don't know too much about John Coltrane other than he was a famous and talented Jazz musician.

Thank you for the author notes, both about the poetry form and about the Jazz great.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 17-Apr-2017

Hi w.j.debi:

Thanks for taking the time to read and review. I understand you checked out my Pleiades, too. I hope you enjoyed the form. I appreciate all of the great comments.

Kim

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Ah, so as a jazz saxophonist left this earth, you arrived here. Your instrument is different but I'm sure you'll have your influence. Thanks for sharing his great playing.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2017

Hi lyenochka:

Thanks for taking the time to read and review. I'm happy that you enjoyed this one and I appreciate your comments.

Kim

Comment from sunnilicious

Excellent

That's kind of morbid information for you to know. However, it might be a sign that you're a born writer. Lol. I always like to find out famous people that I have to share my birthday with.... Lol. Okay, good poem. Nice work. Happy Easter.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2017

Hi Sunni,

I was looking for a different approach to the ones I'd been brainstorming. Finally, I just Googled events that happened on the date of my birth, and from there this poem was born. Writing the memento about my own birthday (and getting that to match the theme of my NaPo book) was more difficult than I'd first imagined lol Thanks for taking the time to read and review.

Kim

Comment from Rlegel99

Excellent

Poem about John Coltrane written as a momento. The artwork works well with this piece. This poem has nice flow. I like personal lean. Thanks foe sharing this piece of poetry.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2017

Hi Rlegel:

Thank you for taking the time to read and review this poem. I'm glad you enjoyed the personal slant to this piece.

Happy Easter!

Kim

Comment from bichonfrisegirl

Excellent

Hi Kim,

This is such a creative premise for a Memento poem. Your poem is a very nice tribute to this Jazz musician. I love that you decided to entitle your poem after his video, "But Not For Me" ... so befitting and very nice. Forty is such a young age to die. "Why Reaper, why? Won't you answer? and "What if I'd been late that time?" ... your queries MAKE this poem, Kim!

Well done! Happy Easter!

Connie

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2017

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2017

Hi Connie!

Thanks for the great review. Your comments are very much appreciated.

Happy Easter!!

Kim