Sometimes Roses, Sometimes Thorns
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "I Met a Girl"A collection of sonnets
21 total reviews
Comment from Eternal Muse
Michael, this was a very romantic and well penned sonnet. I enjoyed it immensely. You are becoming quite a pro at the form.
I am taking a break from site for a while - will probably take a year. Have been here for 12 years - I deserve a sabbatical (lol).
Write on - your poetry is always inspiring.
Warm regards,
-ytbard
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Michael, this was a very romantic and well penned sonnet. I enjoyed it immensely. You are becoming quite a pro at the form.
I am taking a break from site for a while - will probably take a year. Have been here for 12 years - I deserve a sabbatical (lol).
Write on - your poetry is always inspiring.
Warm regards,
-ytbard
Comment Written 29-Jul-2018
Comment from RFL
This is a beautiful sonnet describing an eternal conflict. I love the way you integrated precious gems into this piece -- all beautiful as is "the girl". I have no recommendations for enhancement. And, I think this definitely can be a contest winner. Best, RFL
P.S. I don't have anymore sixes for the rating or you would have one for this.
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This is a beautiful sonnet describing an eternal conflict. I love the way you integrated precious gems into this piece -- all beautiful as is "the girl". I have no recommendations for enhancement. And, I think this definitely can be a contest winner. Best, RFL
P.S. I don't have anymore sixes for the rating or you would have one for this.
Comment Written 27-Jul-2018
Comment from Pearl Edwards
You've written a beautiful sonnet mike, and you set the tone perfectly for an awkward boy that one day will be able to say -I met a girl. Loved it,
cheers,
valda
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You've written a beautiful sonnet mike, and you set the tone perfectly for an awkward boy that one day will be able to say -I met a girl. Loved it,
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 27-Jul-2018
Comment from dragonpoet
It sounds like this girl you met provides all the colors in your world. If she loves you then the relationship can be worth as much as all the gems you use as metaphors.
I like the dress in the picture.
Hope this did well in the contest
Keep writing
Joan
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It sounds like this girl you met provides all the colors in your world. If she loves you then the relationship can be worth as much as all the gems you use as metaphors.
I like the dress in the picture.
Hope this did well in the contest
Keep writing
Joan
Comment Written 26-Jul-2018
Comment from MissMerri
I like this sonnet so much. I loved how you used the various colored gems and diamonds too, to illustrate the emotional colors this unknown beauty arouses in you. I wasn't quite sure about the "grey" day in the last line, because grey denotes sadness and I was looking for happy fulfillment there, but the entire poem until then is so amazing, I felt sure you must have good reasons for your choice of words. I will hope you explain it to me.
Anyway, I think this is a perfectly balanced and descriptive sonnet that will surely win a prize in this contest. Best wishes... and thanks for the reminder in the author notes. MM
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I like this sonnet so much. I loved how you used the various colored gems and diamonds too, to illustrate the emotional colors this unknown beauty arouses in you. I wasn't quite sure about the "grey" day in the last line, because grey denotes sadness and I was looking for happy fulfillment there, but the entire poem until then is so amazing, I felt sure you must have good reasons for your choice of words. I will hope you explain it to me.
Anyway, I think this is a perfectly balanced and descriptive sonnet that will surely win a prize in this contest. Best wishes... and thanks for the reminder in the author notes. MM
Comment Written 26-Jul-2018
Comment from country ranch writer
Romance at a young age brings to one's mind many fantasies. Love comes and goes at this tender age as one grows into a man seeking the one they love.
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Romance at a young age brings to one's mind many fantasies. Love comes and goes at this tender age as one grows into a man seeking the one they love.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2018
Comment from Susanjohn
SEE WHAT I MEAN?! Nothing but yummy deliciousness!..of course follow that girl..Ahhh loving your sonnet!... smooth as that silky flowing picture and just enough ohh la la. It's the kind you close you eyes and just imagine a wonderful love story.. Gosh I'm glad I had a few minutes to log on today!!!!
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SEE WHAT I MEAN?! Nothing but yummy deliciousness!..of course follow that girl..Ahhh loving your sonnet!... smooth as that silky flowing picture and just enough ohh la la. It's the kind you close you eyes and just imagine a wonderful love story.. Gosh I'm glad I had a few minutes to log on today!!!!
Comment Written 26-Jul-2018
Comment from robyn corum
I see you in the distance, should I follow?
I fear you'll find me foolish if I run.
Without you there is nothing, I feel hollow.
My world's an empty sky, and you're the sun.
Mikey,
Wowzer -- I just love the above stanza! Though this whole sonnet was unique and fun. I am imagining a beautiful woman with eyes of deepest blue - that a poor, expectant man might simply fall into and vanish. *smile*
Beautiful words and creative and unique expressions made this come alive for me. Much good luck to you in that contest. Of course, if the CEC is watching, those feminine endings may wind up on the cutting floor.
Thanks and good luck!
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I see you in the distance, should I follow?
I fear you'll find me foolish if I run.
Without you there is nothing, I feel hollow.
My world's an empty sky, and you're the sun.
Mikey,
Wowzer -- I just love the above stanza! Though this whole sonnet was unique and fun. I am imagining a beautiful woman with eyes of deepest blue - that a poor, expectant man might simply fall into and vanish. *smile*
Beautiful words and creative and unique expressions made this come alive for me. Much good luck to you in that contest. Of course, if the CEC is watching, those feminine endings may wind up on the cutting floor.
Thanks and good luck!
Comment Written 26-Jul-2018
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I do not have any sixes left. I used my last one about 10 minutes ago. DARN!!! It's my prayer many reviewers bestow many on this poem. I am a huge sonnet fan and this contest entry is great. I have no clue what feminine endings are. I'm not a poet, I just enjoy reading them. Good luck with the contest.
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I do not have any sixes left. I used my last one about 10 minutes ago. DARN!!! It's my prayer many reviewers bestow many on this poem. I am a huge sonnet fan and this contest entry is great. I have no clue what feminine endings are. I'm not a poet, I just enjoy reading them. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2018
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi, Mikey,
So, here I was expecting to read a free-verse poem from you, and I was pleasantly surprised by this lovely sonnet. I'm actually learning to identify some of the poetic devices you use, but when you mentioned 'metric substitutions,' you lost me.
"Feminine endings?' Oy.
However, I think this is a lovely entry in the Sonnet Poetry contest and I wish you lots of luck.
~patty~
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Hi, Mikey,
So, here I was expecting to read a free-verse poem from you, and I was pleasantly surprised by this lovely sonnet. I'm actually learning to identify some of the poetic devices you use, but when you mentioned 'metric substitutions,' you lost me.
"Feminine endings?' Oy.
However, I think this is a lovely entry in the Sonnet Poetry contest and I wish you lots of luck.
~patty~
Comment Written 26-Jul-2018