Reviews from

Loud Louie

A boy brings a new perspective to the girls in his life

28 total reviews 
Comment from A. Willow Bends
Excellent
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Ah! What a young mother will put up with to find peace. I raised a Loud one, so can totally relate to this child! He is STILL loud. Very good job with this. Always enjoy the turns you take within any given piece. You simply make the reader want to hug this little guy. Keep up the great work! :)
Wendy

 Comment Written 22-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 22-Mar-2019
    My "One Truth" as an educator for lo these many decades, Wendy, is that how people are when they're little is how they grow up to be. A loud child becomes a loud man. But, as my all-time favorite mentor taught me: It take a lot more work to raise a race horse than it does a plow horse, but the rewards at the end are much greater. So I think you were actually chosen to raise a race horse.

    Thanks for your really encouraging review.
Comment from kiwijenny
Excellent
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I kept a little boy with severe cerebral palsy when he was six. But he was a baby in his mind . So although he was strong as a six year old he was a danger to himself. So I let my ten year old son do arm pit farts to keep him happy so I could go to the bathroom.lol
Great story
God bless

 Comment Written 21-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 21-Mar-2019
    Ahhh, the Y-chromosome! Farts are its drug of choice!
Comment from tfawcus
Excellent
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If you can't beat 'em, join 'em! It's hard being the only male in a female environment, especially when you're Louie's age. This is a most entertaining story and one with a happy ending. Love it!

 Comment Written 21-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 21-Mar-2019
    Thank you, tfawcus! Loud is fun. Fun always wins out! (That's why I love children; they get this concept to the hilt.) xo
Comment from Rikki66
Excellent
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Excellent family story of a boy being a boy in a house full of girls. I am of the belief that loud Louie was the baby until the birth of Caroline. At that point loud Louie became the family clown that could make the tired disgruntled baby giggle, smile and laugh; he even got the outh girls to join him in loving his sister.

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 20-Mar-2019
    I could see that scenario!!
reply by Rikki66 on 20-Mar-2019
    Thanks.
Comment from Miss Sherry
Excellent
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Oh, my - such a sweet and wondrous story. I had a Loud Louie too and his loud friends...but it filled the house with joy. This is a delightful story that I thoroughly enjoyed.

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 20-Mar-2019
    Lol. That's a wonderful slice of your life for me to imagine, Miss Sherry. Thank you for this delightful review. xo
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
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LOL! That was such a brilliant story! And Mum is happy with all the noise, lol. Baby Caroline has a devoted brother for life, and his other sisters have found the joy of being loud! Loved this story. Well done. Sandra xxx

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 20-Mar-2019
    Thank you, Sandra! It's a big win all around for the entire crew!! I totally appreciate this warm and wonderful review. xo
Comment from Sanku
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is so sweet and cute. what a sweetheart he is. I loved reading this post.
Poor fellow surrounded by girls at that age .i loved the ending too.
Thanks for posting .It has helped me relax.

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 20-Mar-2019
    Isn't he just the cutest little boy? I think the whole family's a gem...the dad who dresses up for tea parties but does grunt-and-growl wrestling matches, the sisters who want to jump on board the Thunder Train. The mom who says, in essence, "Whatever works!" It was a very fun story to write. I'm so glad you enjoyed it, Sanku. Thank you for this delightful review. xo
Comment from Lordinajamjar
Excellent
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Haha this is my second attempt to comment on this fine piece. I wrote a long spiel last night and when I tried to post the site was down. LOL

Anyway back to this. I really enjoyed it. It flowed very well and I loved that the little man swayed over the all the females to his point of view. Crash! BANG! WALLOP! LOL He will go far with the girls.

Great job

John

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2019
    Oh, that he will!
    Thank you for this very fun (albeit SECOND) review. I loved it. xo
Comment from HealingMuse
Excellent
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Hi Rachelle,

Ha ha ha! This is quute an adorable story. And, as always, very well written.

One offering for your consideration:

"made a circle around our baby. "

I think this would read more fluidly if you were to add "sister" after "baby."

Thanks for a delightful.read.

Jan

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2019
    That YOU for the delightful review!!
Comment from J Christie
Excellent
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I really enjoyed this. There are a couple of times where I feel it might be a stretch to put certain phrases into the child's mind "Sorry, Dad. You're on your own for this one," I feel is more likely to just be "No way" or something as most young children are not a sharp as your phrase suggests. On the other side of that, are phrases like "he drives his gigantic yellow truck to faraway places so that big companies can have important supplies" which sounds, to me at any rate, exactly like how children parrot what their parents say they do. I am also impressed with how you describe the relationships in the family. It is clear that the dad, although away a lot, is still a good dad and spend quality time (not just TV time) with the kids. And it is also clear that their is some tension because of the new baby but this isn't really explicitly said because, of course, the boy wouldn't really be fully aware of it, just the general feeling of problems. I might have a bit of a rework of the second half though. Nothing major but it feels a little rushed. For example ""Louie, can you do that to keep Caroline happy while I make dinner?" Mother called up to me." isn't as believable a phrasing as the rest of the dialogue. I feel the mother is more likely to be a little reluctant to encourage it but chose the lesser of two evils. Finally I really enjoyed the bit where he doesn't jump down the last four stairs in the end, it shows a level of compromise in the boy and not just implying he was right all along. I might have just ended it with the "so we just kept going and going" as the bits after that could be construed as being a bit forced. I hope that is helpful feedback for you as it really is a well put together story.

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2019
    Yes, this is VERY helpful feedback, Christie. Thank you very much for all the time and thought that went into this. xo