RESIDUE OF WAR
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "The Fledgling"And the futility of it all...
19 total reviews
Comment from robyn corum
Dear Mystery Poet,
This is truly a gruesome and beautiful write. It definitely captures the horror and beauty of the 'dance' of war. I hated it as much as I loved it... if that makes sense to you? *smile*
As I read through these entries, so far yours is standing yards above the rest. I have just a couple more to read, but I can't imagine anyone topping this. *smile*
I only have one small question, if you don't mind?
1.) Even though it means the blood of innocents is spilled
--> in this instance, do you mean 'innocents' or 'innocence'?
Thanks so much and much good luck to you in the voting!
reply by the author on 07-May-2019
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Dear Mystery Poet,
This is truly a gruesome and beautiful write. It definitely captures the horror and beauty of the 'dance' of war. I hated it as much as I loved it... if that makes sense to you? *smile*
As I read through these entries, so far yours is standing yards above the rest. I have just a couple more to read, but I can't imagine anyone topping this. *smile*
I only have one small question, if you don't mind?
1.) Even though it means the blood of innocents is spilled
--> in this instance, do you mean 'innocents' or 'innocence'?
Thanks so much and much good luck to you in the voting!
Comment Written 07-May-2019
reply by the author on 07-May-2019
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Thank you very much for your honesty and thoughtful comments. And your keen eye lol! I wrestled with that one, and chose to go with "innocents" rather than "innocence" as I thought it best suited the context. Grammatically incorrect I admit, but that's the risk we poets sometimes take.
But I loved your review, and need to mention you're the first to point that out, so well spotted!
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Thank you very much for your honesty and thoughtful comments. And your keen eye lol! I wrestled with that one, and chose to go with "innocents" rather than "innocence" as I thought it best suited the context. Grammatically incorrect I admit, but that's the risk we poets sometimes take.
But I loved your review, and need to mention you're the first to point that out, so well spotted!
Comment from C. Gale Burnett
An astoundingly beautiful tribute to our fallen heroes. Very smooth flow to the poem, loved the rhyme, perfect choice of artwork, perfect title.
The emotions of dreadful fear, sadness and grief came through loud and clear.
The ending stanza was the icing on the cake.
I loved this verse: 'Those still fighting do not see this joining of each son
who fought in life as enemies, in death becoming one.'
Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 07-May-2019
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An astoundingly beautiful tribute to our fallen heroes. Very smooth flow to the poem, loved the rhyme, perfect choice of artwork, perfect title.
The emotions of dreadful fear, sadness and grief came through loud and clear.
The ending stanza was the icing on the cake.
I loved this verse: 'Those still fighting do not see this joining of each son
who fought in life as enemies, in death becoming one.'
Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 07-May-2019
reply by the author on 07-May-2019
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Thanks very much for your wonderful review!
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The pleasure was all mine :)
Comment from Pearl Edwards
I got goosebumps reading this one, I was right their in battle with the young soldier. Beautifully and emotionally described the sadness of war in the joining of hands in death. A wonderful write and good luck in the contest
cheers.
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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I got goosebumps reading this one, I was right their in battle with the young soldier. Beautifully and emotionally described the sadness of war in the joining of hands in death. A wonderful write and good luck in the contest
cheers.
Comment Written 05-May-2019
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Thank you so much for your sixer,cand your goosebumps lol, not to mention your good luck wishes. All are very appreciated xoxoxo
Comment from light
This is so beautifully written. Most of us who have not been in battle simply have no idea of the emotion involved everyday. They fall on every side but they keep fighting.
Blessings,
Elaine
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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This is so beautifully written. Most of us who have not been in battle simply have no idea of the emotion involved everyday. They fall on every side but they keep fighting.
Blessings,
Elaine
Comment Written 05-May-2019
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Thank you very much indeed!
Comment from Heather Knight
This is a lovely poem on a serious topic. War is the worst. I wish we could make it disappear forever.
Just one thing: have you realized you have posted this as fiction?
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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This is a lovely poem on a serious topic. War is the worst. I wish we could make it disappear forever.
Just one thing: have you realized you have posted this as fiction?
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 05-May-2019
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Thanks for your kind review! Yes, I can't change the category to poetry either, which has happened in another writing prompt I entered grrr
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Maybe if you ask Tom, he?ll do it for you.
Comment from LIJ Red
Willing the fear away is a thing you remember, and the politicians who provoke young men very alike to kill each other deserve a cell in Tartarus.
This looks like an excellent reply to that prompt.
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Willing the fear away is a thing you remember, and the politicians who provoke young men very alike to kill each other deserve a cell in Tartarus.
This looks like an excellent reply to that prompt.
Comment Written 05-May-2019
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Thank you very much indeed!
Comment from Sandra Elizabeth Williams
War is devastating and I truly believe no one really wins. In this short piece you have managed to convey the frightening and painful sense of loss and share the gore that is part of the territory.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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War is devastating and I truly believe no one really wins. In this short piece you have managed to convey the frightening and painful sense of loss and share the gore that is part of the territory.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 05-May-2019
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Thanks so much for stopping by!
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You are very welcome!
Comment from WryWriter
This poetic war and history story deserves far more stars than I have to give. This is fantastic work! The flow and rhyming scheme excellent. Great photograph to go with theme. Superb job!
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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This poetic war and history story deserves far more stars than I have to give. This is fantastic work! The flow and rhyming scheme excellent. Great photograph to go with theme. Superb job!
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Thanks so much for your wonderful comments and ratings. I'm truly humbled! xoxo
Comment from LyndaS
This is one of the best poems I have ever read. Your meter is flawless and this story is riveting. You are right there with this young man and everything he is experiencing. After I read this I just sat, dumbfounded, at your talent. Thank you so much for sharing this. This is really a terrific post. Good luck to you in the vote. Lynda
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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This is one of the best poems I have ever read. Your meter is flawless and this story is riveting. You are right there with this young man and everything he is experiencing. After I read this I just sat, dumbfounded, at your talent. Thank you so much for sharing this. This is really a terrific post. Good luck to you in the vote. Lynda
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Goodness, I'm dumbfounded by your generous rating and your comments! Thank you so much for this honour!!
Comment from Tpa
This item was enjoyable. I must leave that particular item and feel like I would tell someone about it. The Author has paid particular attention to the language used and words were chosen. Every single grammar issue has been resolved and there are no spelling mistakes. I would highly recommend this item to a friend.
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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This item was enjoyable. I must leave that particular item and feel like I would tell someone about it. The Author has paid particular attention to the language used and words were chosen. Every single grammar issue has been resolved and there are no spelling mistakes. I would highly recommend this item to a friend.
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Thanks so much, for your review and recommendation!