It's hard to say sometimes why I don't stop
I often drop in contests clean and gay
Though I obey the rules down from the top
My bellyflop might sully someone's day

I live to troll the contests on this site
Each week I write some awful piece of shit
My savage wit cannot resist a fight
The words that bite excite upon the clit

Some suckers try to thrust me from their view
Yet can't subdue my taunts across the void
My solenoid still sucks them in anew
They can't unscrew the urge to lap up Freud

A cancer grows in sentimental bloat
To laugh to death: the only antidote