The bed was empty. It was the third time this week I had reached over for Lloyd and he wasn't there. Why had I ever let myself become involved with a married man?

My mind wandered back to the first time I discovered Lloyd had marital problems. A group of senior vice-presidents and I were out for Friday happy hour after work.

"Hey, Lloyd; that couch getting too hard for you? Or maybe you're too hard for the couch?” Mike guffawed.

"Cut it out, Mike. You have the tact of a microchip. There's a lady present,” Kevin chimed in.

"That's no lady. That's our boss, right, Katherine, boss lady?”

"Mike, I don't know what you all are talking about,” I drawled. Might as well play the dumb Southern belle on this one; it had served me well.

"Uh oh, Katherine, you're dripping saccharine and honey; we know you're upset,” Kevin said.

"Yes, I like to socialize with you all but we should leave our home problems where they belong--at home.”

"Miss Katherine, you ever get lonely or scared in that big house of yours?”

At least Lloyd had some manners and knew his place.

"Well, I was thinking of renting out a room; we're in a dangerous business and the threatening phone calls are disturbing.” 

I can't believe I opened myself up like that; I was way too vulnerable. Those phone calls had made me off-kilter.

"Hell--I mean, Heck--Miss Katherine, what's so dangerous about what we do? You never told us you were being harassed,” Lloyd said.

I should have kept my mouth shut. Truth is, I was becoming frightened. 

"A business that has multimillion dollar Department of Defense contracts needs to be aware,” I said. I hoped I sounded nonchalant.

"Any of those eco-terrorists breathing heavy on the phone, Kate?” Mike said.

Lord, I wish Mike wouldn't drink so much.

"Miss Katherine, mebbe I could move in with you jest for a while--until the phone calls stopped.”

"Well... Aren't you married, Lloyd?"

"Yeah, that's what Mike was shooting his mouth off about. Me 'n' the Missus not gettin' on so good.”

For somebody who could write elegant computer code, Lloyd's English skills were sadly lacking. I sometimes wondered if it were an act, but why?

"I'm sorry to hear that, Lloyd. My house is large...”

Yeah, and so is your bed, that annoying voice in my mind said. When was the last time you got laid?

He's a married man! My conscience said.

So what? The bad girl chimed in. He's drop dead gorgeous.

Damn, I need to see a shrink. 

"Well, Lloyd, what exactly are you proposing?” I had learned in business to let men take credit for all the ideas. It had hastened my trot up the corporate ladder.

"Let me stay in a room on the other side of the house. If something bothers you, you call me on the intercom. I remember your house from the Christmas party--it's huge.”

"Let me think about it, Lloyd.”

So that first night, I fixed chateaubriand for dinner. Why on earth had my mother taught me to be such a good cook? That saying the way to a man's heart is through his stomach framed an annoying refrain to the bad girl's litany of you need to get laid that night.

We drank too much Chateau Margaux and Lloyd came over to my side of the table to rub my shoulders. 

"You're awful tense, Miss Katherine. Does this feel good?”

Yes, it does! The bad girl screamed. He's married! My conscience said. So what? The bad girl responded.

Oh, all of you, shut up!

We ended up in bed that night. He was a slow and gentle lover and took his time--bringing me almost to climax and withholding several times. His wife had taught him well. His wife? I am not going to think about it now. I'll think about it tomorrow; tomorrow is another day. Oh my God, I'm quoting Gone with the Wind!

It's morning; I need to get to work. Lloyd better show up. That's right--he usually does when he spends the night with his wife and we don't talk about what happened the night before. The clock reads eight-thirty AM; I'd better hurry.

The phone rang. Damn, who calls me this hour on a workday? Oh, wait a minute, it's Saturday!

"Hello?"

"Hello, bitch.” It was the voice of the woman who left the threatening phone calls.

"My husband has the plans of your offices and knows where the top secret DOD contracts are kept. Too bad you couldn't keep your panties on. Lloyd is good at finding a person's weaknesses.”

I felt as if a knife had pierced my brain.

"Look outside the picture window of your mountaintop home, whore. You see Colorado Springs in the distance?”

Stunned, I did as I was told. There was black smoke coming up from the east side of town.

"One of the bombs Lloyd left worked well, didn't it? You want to know where the other one is?”

She was so childish. Oh well, I had copies of all the secret DOD contracts in my home safe and Lloyd didn't have the combination.

I hung up the phone and went to the kitchen to make coffee. My brain needed clarity. 

I heard a ticking in the pantry closet. My heart left my body.