Separated
A Tanka Poem for the club challenge15 total reviews
Comment from harmony13
The author's words flow and connect well. I thought about winter in
New York and identified with the author's words. I like how the author
words on the last two line open up "love's warm awakening!" The artwork
goes well with these words.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2022
The author's words flow and connect well. I thought about winter in
New York and identified with the author's words. I like how the author
words on the last two line open up "love's warm awakening!" The artwork
goes well with these words.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Raul1
I have enjoyed reading your poetry. It is interesting and entertaining to read. It is clear and concise. Excellent work! No grammatical errors. I like your poem. Good job! Thank you for sharing!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
I have enjoyed reading your poetry. It is interesting and entertaining to read. It is clear and concise. Excellent work! No grammatical errors. I like your poem. Good job! Thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Mark D. R.
A very nice addition to the Tanka poetry club! I only disappointed that we have winter as your beginning scene. I am still enjoying these summer days (-;
Mark
P.S. I may take a snooze sitting outside on a warm summer day but I only hibernate in the really cold weather LOL
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
A very nice addition to the Tanka poetry club! I only disappointed that we have winter as your beginning scene. I am still enjoying these summer days (-;
Mark
P.S. I may take a snooze sitting outside on a warm summer day but I only hibernate in the really cold weather LOL
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you Mark, I don't function really well in the cold, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Mrs. KT
Simply gorgeous and moving, KAHPOT!
Your tanka form is "spot on!"
The turn in line three is very effective and most certainly turns from outward to inward.
Beautiful emotive images.
Thank you for sharing!
diane
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
Simply gorgeous and moving, KAHPOT!
Your tanka form is "spot on!"
The turn in line three is very effective and most certainly turns from outward to inward.
Beautiful emotive images.
Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your wonderful and understanding review, I am thrilled that you understood what I was trying to say, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Your modern tanka is excellent in every respect--correct in form and meeting the standards for the tone and theme of a tanka. The contrasting seasons are effective symbols of contrasting emotions.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
Your modern tanka is excellent in every respect--correct in form and meeting the standards for the tone and theme of a tanka. The contrasting seasons are effective symbols of contrasting emotions.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Very nice artwork and presentation, kahpot.
-Notes are appreciated.
-A well written tanka wit a good topic.
-Effective nature imagery as you introduce
winter, followed by a very good pivot line.
-The closing lines are also very good,
and show the contrast with "summer's return."
-Well done!!!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-Very nice artwork and presentation, kahpot.
-Notes are appreciated.
-A well written tanka wit a good topic.
-Effective nature imagery as you introduce
winter, followed by a very good pivot line.
-The closing lines are also very good,
and show the contrast with "summer's return."
-Well done!!!
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your very encouraging comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
-
You are welcome, kahpot.
Comment from Bill Schott
This tanka, Separated, looks good and places a great deal on the seasons' abilities to shape our personal lives and attitudes. The positive summer is greatly missed during the gloomy winter.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
This tanka, Separated, looks good and places a great deal on the seasons' abilities to shape our personal lives and attitudes. The positive summer is greatly missed during the gloomy winter.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from June Sargent
This is a beautiful response to the club challenge! Your words captured the deep sense of longing for a loved one. Touching and sad. Yet, hopeful. Well done!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
This is a beautiful response to the club challenge! Your words captured the deep sense of longing for a loved one. Touching and sad. Yet, hopeful. Well done!
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from CrystieCookie999
You have certainly tackled the tanka form with a modern flair. Strong personification of an invading winter and a lonely heart in a zoomorphic device as if it were a hibernating animal. That is a great poetic stroke there, that I have yet to master. Nice read.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
You have certainly tackled the tanka form with a modern flair. Strong personification of an invading winter and a lonely heart in a zoomorphic device as if it were a hibernating animal. That is a great poetic stroke there, that I have yet to master. Nice read.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Gloria ....
I think you have captured the essence and longing of the Imperial Court Tanka exquisitely here.
Robbed of emotion is a strong statement of that feeling of desolation one feels when the heart is hibernating.
This is a very moving poem, and I thank you for sharing.
Gloria
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
I think you have captured the essence and longing of the Imperial Court Tanka exquisitely here.
Robbed of emotion is a strong statement of that feeling of desolation one feels when the heart is hibernating.
This is a very moving poem, and I thank you for sharing.
Gloria
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
-
Thank you for your wonderful and very encouraging comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot