Intrusive Thoughts
A Dark Sonnet2 total reviews
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This is an unusual sonnet and rather dark and scary. Your metre is a little bumpy throughout, and I have suggestions for these lines for you:
To hand it the reigns, say yes, just agree,
(To hand the reigns, say yes, and just agree).
Let it sing to my family - let them hear.
(Let's sing to family and let them hear)
Good luck, love Dolly x
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This is an unusual sonnet and rather dark and scary. Your metre is a little bumpy throughout, and I have suggestions for these lines for you:
To hand it the reigns, say yes, just agree,
(To hand the reigns, say yes, and just agree).
Let it sing to my family - let them hear.
(Let's sing to family and let them hear)
Good luck, love Dolly x
Comment Written 19-Oct-2024
Comment from Kahlani
What a heartwrenching and sorrowful poem! I feel the pain and frustration, and even the surrendering to evil thoughts. It's powerful and reflective. Well done.
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What a heartwrenching and sorrowful poem! I feel the pain and frustration, and even the surrendering to evil thoughts. It's powerful and reflective. Well done.
Comment Written 19-Oct-2024