His Silence
Viewing comments for Chapter 73 "His Silence - Chapter 72"Why did a 14 year old boy murder his parents?
8 total reviews
Comment from Ulla
Hi Jacob, this is a great chapter. One of your best. I really feel the tension. Just a couple o things:
Do you we know: comma after you or delete either you or we. Otherwise the sentence doesn't make sense.
I just have a feeling, that ...
I don't think you can have a comma before 'that'.
Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2024
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Hi Jacob, this is a great chapter. One of your best. I really feel the tension. Just a couple o things:
Do you we know: comma after you or delete either you or we. Otherwise the sentence doesn't make sense.
I just have a feeling, that ...
I don't think you can have a comma before 'that'.
Ulla:)))
Comment Written 10-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Ulla, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
It seems to me that the only way Oliver can be certain Abraham doesn't go to the police is if he died in the forest along the road. Mary seems certain Danielle isn't going to work out, but Abraham is still certain she will. The second sentence is awkwardly long. Maybe cut it into 2 or 3 sentences.
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2024
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It seems to me that the only way Oliver can be certain Abraham doesn't go to the police is if he died in the forest along the road. Mary seems certain Danielle isn't going to work out, but Abraham is still certain she will. The second sentence is awkwardly long. Maybe cut it into 2 or 3 sentences.
Comment Written 09-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Carol, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
I'm glad you mentioned about Danielle's adoptive parents because I've been worried about their reactions to her absence, especially as she was so concerned in the beginning to keep the pretence going. But this was a good place to re-introduce them because Oliver obviously considers their influence less than helpful for his plans. This is all very meaty now and Danielle's got a lot to chew on. Still no clear-cut answers but suspicion about the purpose of the place continues to grow. Thank you, Jacob, for sharing your excellent story. Debbie
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2024
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I'm glad you mentioned about Danielle's adoptive parents because I've been worried about their reactions to her absence, especially as she was so concerned in the beginning to keep the pretence going. But this was a good place to re-introduce them because Oliver obviously considers their influence less than helpful for his plans. This is all very meaty now and Danielle's got a lot to chew on. Still no clear-cut answers but suspicion about the purpose of the place continues to grow. Thank you, Jacob, for sharing your excellent story. Debbie
Comment Written 09-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Debbie, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Danielle needs to figure out a way to get out of there. Callum is in as much danger as she is. I'm curious of Abraham will make it to the police or if Oliver will make sure he doesn't. I do like this story.
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Danielle needs to figure out a way to get out of there. Callum is in as much danger as she is. I'm curious of Abraham will make it to the police or if Oliver will make sure he doesn't. I do like this story.
Comment Written 09-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Barbara, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from BethShelby
Little by little she is learning new things that give he a reason to believe the people here have something to hide. They are so afraid the police witll find out what is going on. I wonder what it is they haven't told her about her brother.
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Little by little she is learning new things that give he a reason to believe the people here have something to hide. They are so afraid the police witll find out what is going on. I wonder what it is they haven't told her about her brother.
Comment Written 09-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Beth, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Cecilia A Heiskary
Jacob,
Another awesome chapter. You have my curiosity piqued now. What is really going on at that place. You are brilliant. You always leave your reader wanting more. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Cecilia
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Jacob,
Another awesome chapter. You have my curiosity piqued now. What is really going on at that place. You are brilliant. You always leave your reader wanting more. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Cecilia
Comment Written 09-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Cecilia, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
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Jacob,
I always do. I hope that you can get this story published.
Young man don't you ever sleep?
Cecilia
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You're welcome.
Cecilia
Comment from Begin Again
Oliver's comment about Abraham not making it into town: Did he do something to prevent him from getting there? Oliver's a strange guy, and he's a hard one to read. Nice chapter, Jacob. It was very informative and left me wanting to know more.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Oliver's comment about Abraham not making it into town: Did he do something to prevent him from getting there? Oliver's a strange guy, and he's a hard one to read. Nice chapter, Jacob. It was very informative and left me wanting to know more.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 09-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Carol, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
This is so tense! I really felt the sense of being trapped - both physically and emotionally. The quiet movements to eavesdrop are so well done. You really build that feeling of being on edge. I also love the little details like the storm building outside. I like how there is also a storm brewing inside the house! I could feel the unease. I'm definitely curious to know what happens next. Keep up the great work! This pulled me in completely!
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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This is so tense! I really felt the sense of being trapped - both physically and emotionally. The quiet movements to eavesdrop are so well done. You really build that feeling of being on edge. I also love the little details like the storm building outside. I like how there is also a storm brewing inside the house! I could feel the unease. I'm definitely curious to know what happens next. Keep up the great work! This pulled me in completely!
Comment Written 09-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Michael, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.