Paint It Black
No colors any-more, I want them to turn bla-ack3 total reviews
Comment from Slo_6
Pretty dark, indeed. I had a little trouble following, but I expect you want this to be somewhat opaque. Is this a runaway who was maybe homeless for a year?
Your writing is pretty sharp, and you have your own distinct voice. I would suggest you look at your use of ellipses. Sometimes writers throw in ellipses to try to be dramatic, and it doesn't always relay to the reader that way. If you like them, keep them, but my suggestion is to give them a second look.
I can tell you put a lot into this. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
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Pretty dark, indeed. I had a little trouble following, but I expect you want this to be somewhat opaque. Is this a runaway who was maybe homeless for a year?
Your writing is pretty sharp, and you have your own distinct voice. I would suggest you look at your use of ellipses. Sometimes writers throw in ellipses to try to be dramatic, and it doesn't always relay to the reader that way. If you like them, keep them, but my suggestion is to give them a second look.
I can tell you put a lot into this. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 08-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
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Thank you. I appreciate your feedback.
Not homeless. Just wandered in the night.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Your story really drew me in. I felt the struggle in your writing. The way you described the world - the constant darkness, and the sense of being unseen - felt so heavy. The shift when you came across that Bible verse was powerful. I loved how you used it to highlight a moment of change. It was raw and emotional. And I couldn't help but feel moved by it. Your writing is strong! Keep going!
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
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Your story really drew me in. I felt the struggle in your writing. The way you described the world - the constant darkness, and the sense of being unseen - felt so heavy. The shift when you came across that Bible verse was powerful. I loved how you used it to highlight a moment of change. It was raw and emotional. And I couldn't help but feel moved by it. Your writing is strong! Keep going!
Comment Written 08-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
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Thank you immensely for your very kind words.
Comment from Gayla putnam
I remained interested throughout your tale, hoping against hope for a happy ending. The song's repeated use tied the story together. The resolution was heartfelt and spiritual. A unique way to address the prompt. Good luck in the contest. gayla
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2024
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I remained interested throughout your tale, hoping against hope for a happy ending. The song's repeated use tied the story together. The resolution was heartfelt and spiritual. A unique way to address the prompt. Good luck in the contest. gayla
Comment Written 06-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2024
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Thank you!!!!!!!!!!