Writings From the Heart
Viewing comments for Chapter 42 "The company we keep"A book of Poetry & Writing
112 total reviews
Comment from dennis0530
The author's character is deep in thoughts amidst the sound of battle.
This is a tale of bravery, patriotism and camarederie. It is also laced with fear and anxiety. The gloom ond worry that troubles the characted is unending. Never sure when his time will end as he counts his daily toll on his comrades-in-arms.
"Upon this field so gray" not only symbolizes the mood of the setting but also presents a picture of sadness and death as the soldiers battle the enemy.
Facing uncertainty, the character still pridefully banner their oath of duty, sworn to fight for the country.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
  |
The author's character is deep in thoughts amidst the sound of battle.
This is a tale of bravery, patriotism and camarederie. It is also laced with fear and anxiety. The gloom ond worry that troubles the characted is unending. Never sure when his time will end as he counts his daily toll on his comrades-in-arms.
"Upon this field so gray" not only symbolizes the mood of the setting but also presents a picture of sadness and death as the soldiers battle the enemy.
Facing uncertainty, the character still pridefully banner their oath of duty, sworn to fight for the country.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thank you
Comment from Acquired Taste
This is haunting - the terror and fear our warriors feel and experience each day they put their lives on the line to keep us safe. This is a wonderful poem - one of which you should be so very proud. AT=/
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
 |
This is haunting - the terror and fear our warriors feel and experience each day they put their lives on the line to keep us safe. This is a wonderful poem - one of which you should be so very proud. AT=/
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thank you for this
Gary
Comment from Dean Kuch
While this clearly depicts a scene for WWI, your powerful word here could pertain to any war, and any man on either side. We tend to forget sometimes that those guys we are shooting and killing on the other side are human beings, too. They have loved ones, family, and friends just the same as we do.
This really digs deeply into the terror men feel in their hearts as they go into battle.
Great work, GW. I only wish that I wasn't out of six star reviews!
Alas...too bad~Dean
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
|
While this clearly depicts a scene for WWI, your powerful word here could pertain to any war, and any man on either side. We tend to forget sometimes that those guys we are shooting and killing on the other side are human beings, too. They have loved ones, family, and friends just the same as we do.
This really digs deeply into the terror men feel in their hearts as they go into battle.
Great work, GW. I only wish that I wasn't out of six star reviews!
Alas...too bad~Dean
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thank you
-
Sure...
Comment from Drew Delaney
Sad emotions are brought forth from the reader. It remind me of what is going on in the Middle East today. Warfare that is killing innocent victims. Your words are haunting. Well written, deepwater.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
|
Sad emotions are brought forth from the reader. It remind me of what is going on in the Middle East today. Warfare that is killing innocent victims. Your words are haunting. Well written, deepwater.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thank you
Comment from write hand blue
A nicely written poem with an appropriate picture.
I think the POV is so much more dramatic when written first person as you have.
A good poem with a message. :) mel.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
|
A nicely written poem with an appropriate picture.
I think the POV is so much more dramatic when written first person as you have.
A good poem with a message. :) mel.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thanks Mel
Comment from Set in Stone
This has the sound and feeling of a prayer. There's a touch of rhyme but not so much as to make this sound light or trivial, for it is a serious matter. I do like the simile "as young lions", as it effectively portrays the agility and determination of the young men. If I may make one suggestion: In line 3 you use the word "lay", which is a past tense of lie. All the rest of the poem is written in the present. I'd therefore suggest you change "lay" to "lie". A beautifully touching piece of work.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
|
This has the sound and feeling of a prayer. There's a touch of rhyme but not so much as to make this sound light or trivial, for it is a serious matter. I do like the simile "as young lions", as it effectively portrays the agility and determination of the young men. If I may make one suggestion: In line 3 you use the word "lay", which is a past tense of lie. All the rest of the poem is written in the present. I'd therefore suggest you change "lay" to "lie". A beautifully touching piece of work.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thank you stone good change
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi GW,
Something tells me there are no truer words spoken then what you've written. I'm sure words just like this run through a soldiers mind.
Such a tragedy - war. Well done.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
|
Hi GW,
Something tells me there are no truer words spoken then what you've written. I'm sure words just like this run through a soldiers mind.
Such a tragedy - war. Well done.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thank you jax
Comment from Ben Colder
A question asked by everyone in battle. One must always expect the unexpected. You did good with this tribute to our WW1 soldiers. Shalom.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
|
A question asked by everyone in battle. One must always expect the unexpected. You did good with this tribute to our WW1 soldiers. Shalom.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thank you
Comment from Victoria K
What an incredibly moving poem; it literally brought tears to my eyes.
Your choice to use a first person narrator is very effective as it includes the reader in a shared perspective. It is as if we ourselves, are standing on that battlefield, staring down unknown terrors.
Your photo pairing is perfect.
Outstanding.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
|
What an incredibly moving poem; it literally brought tears to my eyes.
Your choice to use a first person narrator is very effective as it includes the reader in a shared perspective. It is as if we ourselves, are standing on that battlefield, staring down unknown terrors.
Your photo pairing is perfect.
Outstanding.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thanks again
Comment from vapros
No doubt that this was the mindset of many young men, there in the trenches of France - and of all wars. You have presented your message, not in a graphic description of war, but in the fear that attends. Good work.
v
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
|
No doubt that this was the mindset of many young men, there in the trenches of France - and of all wars. You have presented your message, not in a graphic description of war, but in the fear that attends. Good work.
v
Comment Written 31-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2014
-
Thank you
