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100 word dash26 total reviews
Comment from GARY MACLEAN
You met the 100-word requirement on the nose while providing main character (Sadie), Setting (dimly lit room), conflict (home invader), resolution (shoot the bastard).
Nicely done, especially working with limited resources (100-words)
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
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You met the 100-word requirement on the nose while providing main character (Sadie), Setting (dimly lit room), conflict (home invader), resolution (shoot the bastard).
Nicely done, especially working with limited resources (100-words)
Comment Written 20-May-2022
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
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Thank you, Gary. Loved this excellent review my friend.
God bless
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This was my first choice by the way. You make me want to read the book - lol.
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Wow! Thank you.
Comment from LisaMay
I read this yesterday but didn't have time to review it. Now In see it is a bit different; the reference to the shoulder is changed, and the severed spine is gone. It is still very gruesome and scary - great horror/thriller impact.
Comments:
She could hear her attacker in the master bath
(Is he actually in the bath? I think 'bathroom' would be better.)
She could hear her attacker in the master bath,(add comma) but couldn't see him. Sadie grabbed the bow,(add comma) sliding the arrow into place.
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
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I read this yesterday but didn't have time to review it. Now In see it is a bit different; the reference to the shoulder is changed, and the severed spine is gone. It is still very gruesome and scary - great horror/thriller impact.
Comments:
She could hear her attacker in the master bath
(Is he actually in the bath? I think 'bathroom' would be better.)
She could hear her attacker in the master bath,(add comma) but couldn't see him. Sadie grabbed the bow,(add comma) sliding the arrow into place.
Comment Written 20-May-2022
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
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Thank you, Lisa, for the excellent and helpful review.
God bless
Comment from Wendy G
Well this one met the brief - there was certainly everything, right to the gory resolution! Written clearly and well, so I send good wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
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Well this one met the brief - there was certainly everything, right to the gory resolution! Written clearly and well, so I send good wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
Comment Written 20-May-2022
reply by the author on 20-May-2022
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Thank you, Wendy. I certainly enjoyed the challenge. Thank you for the best wishes as well.
God bless!
Comment from joann r romei
This was great, and a complete story in just a short amounts of words, I can feel the tension in every word and step of the way. I did not see any errors, ty for sharing.
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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This was great, and a complete story in just a short amounts of words, I can feel the tension in every word and step of the way. I did not see any errors, ty for sharing.
Comment Written 19-May-2022
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Awesome review, Joann. I enjoyed the challenge. Thank you for reading.
God bless!
Comment from Malcolm Rothery
A good 100-word story - just a couple of issues:
I think it should be .."...she cried as pain and blood...." and "...saturated..." to keep the tense consistent.
After "....asshole!" maybe say "she yelled" as "she said" does not match with the exclamation mark which signifies anger. Or just lose the exclamation mark.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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A good 100-word story - just a couple of issues:
I think it should be .."...she cried as pain and blood...." and "...saturated..." to keep the tense consistent.
After "....asshole!" maybe say "she yelled" as "she said" does not match with the exclamation mark which signifies anger. Or just lose the exclamation mark.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 19-May-2022
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Awesome, thank you. I appreciate the help Malcolm and the time you took to review my work.
God bless!
Comment from the13thpoet
Hello mystery writer I hope this review finds you well. Thank you for sharing your 100 word dash with us. To tell a story in so few words is a challenge that I think you executed well. Good job and good luck.
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Hello mystery writer I hope this review finds you well. Thank you for sharing your 100 word dash with us. To tell a story in so few words is a challenge that I think you executed well. Good job and good luck.
Comment Written 19-May-2022
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Thank you for the awesome review, my friend.
God bless!
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
This is a good flash, you did a creative job with the prompt.
I think an image or photo to accompany it would have added
extra texture and dimension to the story. Your writing is descriptive,
however, as with most flash fiction stories, this reads a little awkwardly.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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This is a good flash, you did a creative job with the prompt.
I think an image or photo to accompany it would have added
extra texture and dimension to the story. Your writing is descriptive,
however, as with most flash fiction stories, this reads a little awkwardly.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 18-May-2022
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Thank you for taking the time to review my work and helpful tips. I tried to find a pic on line but couldn't find one. Any suggestions?
God bless!
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Any photo or illustration featuring a bow and arrow, definitely incorporate red, symbolizes blood. This site has a ton of artwork, or online has endless images as well. I would search.. bloody bow and arrow, or a woman dripping blood. How that helps.
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I found a picture of a bloody hand opening a white door, like the bathroom. I think it looks cool. Thanks again for all your help.
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Looks great!!!
Comment from Carolyn Dooley
She got revenge. With one shot. Was it her husband? It sounds like the husband tried to kill her. He must have thought he killed her. This would be a heck of a situation. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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She got revenge. With one shot. Was it her husband? It sounds like the husband tried to kill her. He must have thought he killed her. This would be a heck of a situation. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 18-May-2022
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Thank you for the awesome review, Carolyn. I may have to go further with this one. Did the arrow strike the assailant? Was it the husband, thief or serial killer? Not sure myself as of yet lol.
God bless!
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You have a triller here. You are welcome.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Well, this was scary as all get out, Mystery Author.
You did a great job with your entry considering the
limited words allowed. You told a complete little
story with vivid imagery.
Best wishes, Jan
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
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Well, this was scary as all get out, Mystery Author.
You did a great job with your entry considering the
limited words allowed. You told a complete little
story with vivid imagery.
Best wishes, Jan
Comment Written 18-May-2022
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
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Thank you, Jan. I appreciate the awesome review, my friend.
God bless!
Comment from jessizero
This was a great 100 word story. It met all of the requirements and was very interesting, too. I was half afraid that the husband was the killer. Thank you so much for sharing your story here, and best wishes.
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
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This was a great 100 word story. It met all of the requirements and was very interesting, too. I was half afraid that the husband was the killer. Thank you so much for sharing your story here, and best wishes.
Comment Written 18-May-2022
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
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Thank you, Jessizero for the awesome review. I enjoyed the challenge.
God bless!