The Return
Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "The Return Chapter 23"Erotic Turmoil
34 total reviews
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
The ball was lovely until it became exciting thanks to Lord Brandon. His bad behavior seems to have set his son to thinking. Very good. Discovering his father's dirty deeds would be best coming from him instead of learning all of them from Margot/Meg. There is one sentence that struck me as awkward. May I suggest you write it this way: 'All the women . . . direction, I will agree.' It seems to flow better with what came before and after it. I'm so looking forward to the next chapter. How wonderful that you can be nearby for the Queen's Jubilee.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2022
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The ball was lovely until it became exciting thanks to Lord Brandon. His bad behavior seems to have set his son to thinking. Very good. Discovering his father's dirty deeds would be best coming from him instead of learning all of them from Margot/Meg. There is one sentence that struck me as awkward. May I suggest you write it this way: 'All the women . . . direction, I will agree.' It seems to flow better with what came before and after it. I'm so looking forward to the next chapter. How wonderful that you can be nearby for the Queen's Jubilee.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much, Carol, for another lovely review. Miles isn't happy with his father, but it has made him think of other things. And thank you for the suggestion, I'll take another look at that!! Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Hmm, what does Bessie really know. . . ? You did a great job
with this chapter, Sandra. All the preparations for the ball
came together well . . . except for LBrandon showing up
and making a complete fool of himself. Of course, Bessie's
there in her role to help Margot with the names and bits of
info. Since she knows that info, I believe she knows the name
of the real killer, but is determined that Margot discover it. The introduction of LShivers added a new tangent into the mix. I
wonder if she's somehow involved--a jealous woman, lover,
someone aid her to . . . .Miles went to extremes with the ball,
but was it for real love or . . . ? Is he hiding something? You
gave readers much info and much to think about, Sandra. I
look forward to the next chapter. Margot was so caught up
with how to act, remembering the names, etc. she didn't
really have time to think about all the possibilities.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2022
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Hmm, what does Bessie really know. . . ? You did a great job
with this chapter, Sandra. All the preparations for the ball
came together well . . . except for LBrandon showing up
and making a complete fool of himself. Of course, Bessie's
there in her role to help Margot with the names and bits of
info. Since she knows that info, I believe she knows the name
of the real killer, but is determined that Margot discover it. The introduction of LShivers added a new tangent into the mix. I
wonder if she's somehow involved--a jealous woman, lover,
someone aid her to . . . .Miles went to extremes with the ball,
but was it for real love or . . . ? Is he hiding something? You
gave readers much info and much to think about, Sandra. I
look forward to the next chapter. Margot was so caught up
with how to act, remembering the names, etc. she didn't
really have time to think about all the possibilities.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 06-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2022
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Thank you so very much, Jan, for another of your fabulous and insightful reviews! You really do get into my story, and alway put ideas into my head!! I loved this one, Jan, and thank you so much for the golden star! Love and hugs my friend! :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Ric Myworld
Some people will do anything to get their own way, and that means anything. So now, you have me anxiously awaiting for what I'm seeing as the inevitable. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2022
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Some people will do anything to get their own way, and that means anything. So now, you have me anxiously awaiting for what I'm seeing as the inevitable. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much, Ric! Yes, there is trouble ahead for someone!! Thanks my friend. Love and hugs. Sandra xxx
Comment from Cindy Warren
I just knew Miles' father was going to show up! He certainly managed to make a fool of himself. And he's not done. Of course, Miles is going to have to figure things out if he's going to stop him and save Meg. Can't wait.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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I just knew Miles' father was going to show up! He certainly managed to make a fool of himself. And he's not done. Of course, Miles is going to have to figure things out if he's going to stop him and save Meg. Can't wait.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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No, he's not done yet. Things are going to get a little tetchy on both sides. Thank you, Cindy, for sharing your thoughts on this chapter. I really appreciated them. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from nancy_e_davis
What a shame! What should have been a wonderful night of celebration was just ruined by the selfish actions of Miles' father. However it seems to have brought forth some new questions in Miles' mind? Maybe the act will help him come up with some answers. Well done, Sandra. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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What a shame! What should have been a wonderful night of celebration was just ruined by the selfish actions of Miles' father. However it seems to have brought forth some new questions in Miles' mind? Maybe the act will help him come up with some answers. Well done, Sandra. Nancy:)
Comment Written 06-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much, Nancy. Miles father is not about to give up and go away quietly. But now Miles is thinking. That's good I'm glad you are still enjoying the story, my friend. Thank you!! Love and hugs, Sandra xx
Comment from Sanku
The evil Lord Brandon spewed venom into a lovely happy party . Bessie keeping close to her is a great blessing .The cliff hanger ending is great.You are keeping us on the edge of the seat...
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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The evil Lord Brandon spewed venom into a lovely happy party . Bessie keeping close to her is a great blessing .The cliff hanger ending is great.You are keeping us on the edge of the seat...
Comment Written 06-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much for another of your wonderful reviews, Sanku! I'm so pleased you are still enjoying my story. Have a great week,my friend. Warm hugs, Sandra xxx
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Thank you so much, Sanku! I'm so pleased you're still enjoying my story. Have a wonderful week. Warm hugs, Sandra xxx
Comment from Jay Squires
This is your usual superb writing, Sandra. It's nice to come upon your post on Sunday Morn and know that I can be entertained for a half-hour or so without scouring the text. I know all your fans feel the same.
Here are a few notes I made while reading
Margot frowned, but a tap on the door meant she couldn't say anymore. [Sandra, I believe you'll find that anymore should be divided into any more, as in any THING more. Unless ... it is handled differently in England.]
'I shall be the envy of all the women at the party.' [This is just to look at, Sandra. It's not wrong, but consider changing the first part of that sentence to "You'll make me the envy of all the women at the party." This is because, I first thought she was referring to her gown making her the envy ... and I was thinking, "my, she's full of herself." Just something to consider, though. I realize that Miles shortly removes any ambiguity with his elegant words.]
Again thank you for giving me a jolt of gentility every week. I need it.
Jay
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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This is your usual superb writing, Sandra. It's nice to come upon your post on Sunday Morn and know that I can be entertained for a half-hour or so without scouring the text. I know all your fans feel the same.
Here are a few notes I made while reading
Margot frowned, but a tap on the door meant she couldn't say anymore. [Sandra, I believe you'll find that anymore should be divided into any more, as in any THING more. Unless ... it is handled differently in England.]
'I shall be the envy of all the women at the party.' [This is just to look at, Sandra. It's not wrong, but consider changing the first part of that sentence to "You'll make me the envy of all the women at the party." This is because, I first thought she was referring to her gown making her the envy ... and I was thinking, "my, she's full of herself." Just something to consider, though. I realize that Miles shortly removes any ambiguity with his elegant words.]
Again thank you for giving me a jolt of gentility every week. I need it.
Jay
Comment Written 05-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much, Jay! I'm glad you picked me up of those two points, especially the envious part. I stumbled on that. I've made both the changes. And a big thank you for the golden star and fabulous comments. You're such a dear friend. Warm nugs, Sandra xxxx
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Wow, romance moves the worlds go around and beauty comes from the heart. Thank you for sharing this idyllic chapter. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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Wow, romance moves the worlds go around and beauty comes from the heart. Thank you for sharing this idyllic chapter. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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Thank you so much, Iza. I'm so pleased you are with me and enjoying my story. It's so encouraging. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from John Ciarmello
Miles is too much of a gentleman to punch out his father, but I would have. I'm happy he's starting to think about the note. Bessie standing behind her at the guest reception, was genius, Sandra. Great chapter!
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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Miles is too much of a gentleman to punch out his father, but I would have. I'm happy he's starting to think about the note. Bessie standing behind her at the guest reception, was genius, Sandra. Great chapter!
Comment Written 05-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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The note will come into play soon. :) I'm so pleased you are still enjoying my story, John, thank you so much for your lovely review! Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from lyenochka
Oh what a terrible disruption to an otherwise perfect party. I liked that Bessie was coaching Meg all the way through it. I almost wished the Meg would have shared what she knew about Lord Brandon right them in front of all the guests. But I guess Miles will have to piece everything together...Great chapter!
Questions/Comments:
I liked the bit about Meg spreading the skirt out to provide space for Bessie to sit. But since Bessie went in first, wouldn't Miles be sitting on the other side of her? Or did Miles come around to the other side?
explain a memory of one of the quests (guests?)
He walked. albeit, (comma, not period after 'walked')
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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Oh what a terrible disruption to an otherwise perfect party. I liked that Bessie was coaching Meg all the way through it. I almost wished the Meg would have shared what she knew about Lord Brandon right them in front of all the guests. But I guess Miles will have to piece everything together...Great chapter!
Questions/Comments:
I liked the bit about Meg spreading the skirt out to provide space for Bessie to sit. But since Bessie went in first, wouldn't Miles be sitting on the other side of her? Or did Miles come around to the other side?
explain a memory of one of the quests (guests?)
He walked. albeit, (comma, not period after 'walked')
Comment Written 05-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2022
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Hi Helen, I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part. Things are getting closer to finding out who the would-be murderer is. I've made those too corrections, thanks so much for pointing those out. Thank goodness you have a sharp eye! As for the part in the carriage, don't forget that Miles can't see Bessie, if he had wanted to sit next to Margot, there might have been a problem. That she spread her skirt made it impossible for Miles to even try.
Thank you for another lovely, helpful review, my friend. Warm hugs, Sandra xx
