Separated
A Tanka Poem for the club challenge15 total reviews
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Oh, kym, you nailed it. What a beautiful tanka. Good form, syllables count and connection between lines. I love the presentation too. Well done, my friend.
Gypsy
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
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Oh, kym, you nailed it. What a beautiful tanka. Good form, syllables count and connection between lines. I love the presentation too. Well done, my friend.
Gypsy
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
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Thank you very much I am glad that I am slowly getting the hang of short forms, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Wendy G
Yes, winter seems to cause emotional withdrawal as well as physical, and we do long for the renewal and warmth of Spring, and the lightening of our hearts with the arrival of warmer weather and outdoor activities. Well written Tanka.
Wendy
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
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Yes, winter seems to cause emotional withdrawal as well as physical, and we do long for the renewal and warmth of Spring, and the lightening of our hearts with the arrival of warmer weather and outdoor activities. Well written Tanka.
Wendy
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
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Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from lyenochka
You've really captured the tanka form here. You started with winter and the coldness of the lonely heart then you pivot to the focus on emotion and return us to memories of summer. Great job with your moving poem!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
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You've really captured the tanka form here. You started with winter and the coldness of the lonely heart then you pivot to the focus on emotion and return us to memories of summer. Great job with your moving poem!
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
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Thank you for this very encouraging review and wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from LateBloomer
Hello kahpot, your poem illustrates the cold of winter and what it does to our spirit. Of special note:
as winter invades
my lonely heart hibernates
(Soulful. k, more than my heart hibernates, my whole body too. I hate winter. Ugh.)
Summer's not over yet, and I am already missing it. Well done. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer
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reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
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Hello kahpot, your poem illustrates the cold of winter and what it does to our spirit. Of special note:
as winter invades
my lonely heart hibernates
(Soulful. k, more than my heart hibernates, my whole body too. I hate winter. Ugh.)
Summer's not over yet, and I am already missing it. Well done. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2022
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Thank you for your wonderful comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from dellsworthpoet
A nice flowing tanka. The language is simple. The images are clear. The presentation fits well with the poem.
I long for summers return
In this line it seems that summers should be possessive.
Thanks for a good read.
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reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
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A nice flowing tanka. The language is simple. The images are clear. The presentation fits well with the poem.
I long for summers return
In this line it seems that summers should be possessive.
Thanks for a good read.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 28-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2022
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Thank you, and yes it should be, your encouraging and helpful comments are very much appreciated****kahpot
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You are welcome.