Artificial Intelligence
Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Living in the Machine, part III"A critique of technology
11 total reviews
Comment from dellsworthpoet
An interesting poem. The images are clear. The language is hard-edged as fits the subject. The narrative stays on point. The piece reads well.
Suggestion:
I think this type of poem would work well in chant format. That being a long line and then a short refrain. I would be thinking "here inside the machine" every other line would make it even more mechanical and incessant in drum-beat.
Thanks for a good read.
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reply by the author on 26-Jun-2023
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An interesting poem. The images are clear. The language is hard-edged as fits the subject. The narrative stays on point. The piece reads well.
Suggestion:
I think this type of poem would work well in chant format. That being a long line and then a short refrain. I would be thinking "here inside the machine" every other line would make it even more mechanical and incessant in drum-beat.
Thanks for a good read.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your interesting suggestion for reorganzing the piece. That actually sounds like it might be something I would be interested in trying. I'll have to see if I can come up with something along those lines. estory
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You are welcome.
