Reviews from

My Aunt Margaret

Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Changing of the Guard"
You Just Never Know

15 total reviews 
Comment from Begin Again
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Quite the dark side shining through with this one, but well deserving of course.
And now we shall move on for a twofer! That should be quite interesting, but then all your tories are. Go get'em girlfriend.
Smiles, Carol

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
    Any ideas on who they kill and why? I think the twins will need several chapters. The two girls are identical.
    Except for one thing. I haven't decided what yet. Thanks for the read. Karen
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Excellent
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So who is the bad guy??????
A few glitches:
He will feel the need to leave, it doesn't do to have too many eyes around. - maybe a semicolon since there is a complete sentence on either side?
four rings which I assume belongs to the women he misused. - (assume)
I will have to tape it I do not have time to read it all. - Maybe a period after the first 'it'?
So tonights the night. - (tonight's)
Best wishes.

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
    I went back and edited some more your beady eyes missed a few. Thanks for the read. And I always await your edits. I grouse, but I appreciate your attention.
    Karen
reply by Wayne Fowler on 08-Dec-2024
    smiley face here
    grouse on!
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Oh, Karen, there are a few people I know that need to be ... disposed of! Could you swim over the pond and help me out!!? Lol. Buried alive? He was awake and watching the soil come down, I think that must have been torture enough, lol! So we have twins to get rid of next? Is your name really Mazledanya by any chance? Escaped from my story... I know she would be targeting the twins in my story next. But mine are good twins. Lol. This is great, my friend. Well done, can't wait for the next part. :)) Sandra. xx

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
    A six! Yippie skippie. I think the twins will be girls. Identical twins . Only no one knows there are two of them. Cool idea? Thanks for the read. Karen
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
Excellent
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Change "conscious" to "conscience" in the last paragraph.

You sure love to go dark, especially with male characters! And you finally gave your narrator a name which, of course, has an alliteration in it (you love naming names too).

We'll see how she handles those twins. She's going to need Chauncy and perhaps another for that job. "Core building" only goes so far:-)

Happy Sunday, Karen.

xo
Pam

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
    You are an strong athlete. What classes should she be taking? Any ideas? She never did much more than swim and some hiking. Thanks for the read. Karen
reply by Pam Lonsdale on 08-Dec-2024
    Swimming is the best all around worko, but if she's a badass, then CrossFit!
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
    When I was young, and was between bad spurts I was a runner. The coach despaired because I could not be on a team. I loved running. I was in my head while doing it. Now I cannot do much of anything. And the Ponderosa is not the only "Big spread" at my house.:-) Beverly will do CrossFit and up her swimming. Thanks so much. Karen
reply by Pam Lonsdale on 08-Dec-2024
    Have her do 3 introductory classes with a one-on-one trainer before she's thrown into a class with others. More believable that way.
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2024
    That information is locked into my brain pan. Karen
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2024
    That information is locked into my brain pan. Karen
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2024
    That information is locked into my brain pan. Karen
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2024
    That information is locked into my brain pan. Karen
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Excellent
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Wow, Karen, you sure have a deep dark side to you. I admit I haven't been following this novel of your aunt Margaret until now but you have so many plot twists in this it isn't funny like I imagined it to be.
The print is large enough to read easily and the paragraphs are spaced well enough to easily digest.
From what I gather you were up to no good in this caper of a stunt to bury your mother's adversary.
Good luck burying him alive as you planned!
Jesse


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 Comment Written 08-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
    Read the rest without reviewing so you can get caught up. Thanks for the read. Twin ladies I think. No one realizes there are two of them. that is why they have never been caught. They are identical. :-)
reply by Jesse James Doty on 08-Dec-2024
    Thanks for letting me know.
    Now it sounds more interesting.
    It was confusing but now I understand.
    Jesse
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
    I am writing about twins next.
    I messed up explaining. Give me your email in a contact form and I will send you the story. :-)
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2024
    just start at the beginning it makes little sense if you do not know the whole thing. Karen