Comment from Ritsal

Excellent

You've definitely got my attention here. Great chapter, clean and fast moving...

Okay, draw me a word picture and tell me what this guy looks like."

[I'd add a little more here of the guy sketching, etc.] or break it up with a time lapse

* * *

Sam Hudson emerged with such vivid accuracy, Molly gasped. "That's him, sir. Exactly."

Does the Amber Alert thing really happen that fast - getting the photo up and all? And she'd only been gone less than two hours... seems to be moving a little fast.

Best wishes,
Rita

 Comment Written 12-May-2008

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reply by the author on 12-May-2008

Hey Rita,

Yes, they know time is of the essence. Once they get the report, a picture and description, they get it up through computer. Really doesn't take much time to do it. With the computer and Homeland Security measures, it's very quick.

Let me see if I can expand things a bit here without getting wordy! LOL!

Hugs,
Gayle

reply by Ritsal on 12-May-2008

might be easier just to add some asterisks. :)

Comment from Rainbow Writer

Excellent

Although I'm not familiar with the rest of the book, I enjoyed the chapter and it flowed really well. I think you write extremely well and I could see no nits.

Good place to end, makes us want to read on - what a terrifying situation.

Emma

 Comment Written 12-May-2008

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reply by the author on 12-May-2008

Hi Emma,

Luckily you came into the book early enough that you can catch up ifyou want to.

I hope to see you again and thanks for the fine R&R.

Gayle

Comment from Korton

Excellent

This is definitely an earth shaking and horrifying experience for all involved. No doubt Beth's parents are in shock as are Molly's. The police are performing admirably in this situation. Hopefully it won't be long before they get a lead. Very well done.

 Comment Written 12-May-2008

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reply by the author on 12-May-2008

Hey Frank,

Dear me, can you imagine being in that situation for real? Sad to say, it's virtually a daily occurence in this country.

I hope they find him soon, too.

Gayle

Comment from RossJM

Excellent

Oh, my God. You got me pinned to the screen, reading your story. Excellent development, Gayle. Can't wait until the next chapter comes out.
Don't keep us in suspence too long, or we'll go nuts.
*Smile*

Regards,
Ross

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 Comment Written 12-May-2008

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reply by the author on 12-May-2008

Hey Ross,

This is scary, isn't it. I have to take a deliberate breather every once in a while or I get overwhelmed. The story is just flowing!

Thanks for the super duper R&R and your fine rating.

Gayle

Comment from Janet65

Exceptional

Hi Showtimebook,

Wow, what an exciting story. Everything is right on track, and the suspense is great. I hope I get to read the next chapter of this novel. The story flows well, with events occurring in a natural order.
The dialogue is very natural, and I can see the story in my mind's eye. It is so real.
There were no errors that I could find, and nothing I would suggest changing.
Janet65

 Comment Written 12-May-2008

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reply by the author on 12-May-2008

Hey Janet! A Sixer! Whoopee!

I really appreciate that as well as the fine comments. Your vote of confidence is much appreciated,

Gayle

Comment from Johnny Carwash

Excellent

Wow. Just gets better and better. Glad I found this book early on. It's going to be a pleasure to follow it through to the end. Keep up the great work. Looks like I need to join your Fan List. :)

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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 12-May-2008

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reply by the author on 12-May-2008

Hey Johnny...love your name! :-)

I'm glad you did, too. So far, the story is pouring out, so I hope I can keep up the pace. No slumps allowed! LOL!

Thanks again,

Gayle