Hey Mister
Contest Entry (a bit long - but worth it!)33 total reviews
Comment from Annie995
Such a heart-warming tale, you can tell alot of thought went into it. The idea is original and is a good read Keep up the good work and hope you win. ;)
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Such a heart-warming tale, you can tell alot of thought went into it. The idea is original and is a good read Keep up the good work and hope you win. ;)
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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thank you, Annie, for your kind comments and your generous rating. Warmest regards, Marijke
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My pleasure, tell me if you win!! And best of luckk.
Comment from Realist101
Hi Marijke! What a lovely story! I found your characters to be totally believeable and real. The emotions described too, were really great! AND the ending is just right too! My best to you with this, it will do well in the contest!! ") HUGS!! Susan
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Hi Marijke! What a lovely story! I found your characters to be totally believeable and real. The emotions described too, were really great! AND the ending is just right too! My best to you with this, it will do well in the contest!! ") HUGS!! Susan
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Hi Susan, thank you so much for those lovely comments. I'm pleased the emotions come through (they made my cry whilst writing!). Warmest regards, hugs and smiles, Marijke
Comment from patmedium
This is NOT afunny story, Marijke. It has had me in tears. You have written such a wonderful tale and I wish you the best in that contest. (I'm going to read it again before I click on 'save'). xxxx
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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This is NOT afunny story, Marijke. It has had me in tears. You have written such a wonderful tale and I wish you the best in that contest. (I'm going to read it again before I click on 'save'). xxxx
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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No, Pat, I guess this is not a funny story. It took on a life of its own. It was going to be a short piece, with some humour, and ended up having me crying while I was writing it! Thanks for your lovely comments, and for wanting to read it again. That, my friend, is a real compliment. Also, thank you so much for those lovely stars, they are shining brightly on my screen. I may have to hand them over to my muse. After putting something in writing about my muse deserting me earlier in the week, this happened!
Warmest regards, my friend.
Marijke xxxxx :o)
Comment from FredCollingwood
Well, you did it with this one Marijke. You covered all the bases of the writing prompt and you did it well. what a precocious little kid, but lovable.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Well, you did it with this one Marijke. You covered all the bases of the writing prompt and you did it well. what a precocious little kid, but lovable.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Yes, I drew on the personality of a foster child I know. Name Brody. The story isn't his, but the personality is, up to a point. Thanks, my friend, for your lovely comments and generous rating. Warmest regards, Marijke
Comment from Deseree
This was really good! when Brody makes a mess while eating the burger I cried, that really got me. But to see the ending where the lil kids find a home with Colin and Jenny. was great, Good work and good luck.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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This was really good! when Brody makes a mess while eating the burger I cried, that really got me. But to see the ending where the lil kids find a home with Colin and Jenny. was great, Good work and good luck.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Deseree, for your wonderful words and generous rating. If I made you cry, that's good (means the emotions are coming through). Thanks again, and warmest wishes.
Comment from highlander104
Very emotional story; even brought a tear to my eye. You've written a wonderful tale for this prompt and should do well in the contest. I just love the way the little boy wins over Colin's heart. Good write.
Jean K.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Very emotional story; even brought a tear to my eye. You've written a wonderful tale for this prompt and should do well in the contest. I just love the way the little boy wins over Colin's heart. Good write.
Jean K.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Jean, for those lovely comments and your generous rating. Warmest regards, Marijke
Comment from BethShelby
This is a very touching story. It even brought a tear to my eye. The character of the narrator is well developed and the dialogue is great. I especially enjoyed the little's boys dialogue. I love stories with happy endings and this story definitely has one. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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This is a very touching story. It even brought a tear to my eye. The character of the narrator is well developed and the dialogue is great. I especially enjoyed the little's boys dialogue. I love stories with happy endings and this story definitely has one. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Thank you so much, Beth, for that kind review. Yes, I love happy endings too. Warmest regards, Marijke
Comment from daniela.albu
Wonderful story. Collin's life is mirrored in that of Brody. The dog creates the bond. The dialogues flow naturally and the predictable end comes on an optimistic note. Just in the following line, for the sake of consistency, I presume it should read "Amy":
". I was in the car with them, and so was Mia, but we wasn't hurt, 'cept I had a broken arm."
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Wonderful story. Collin's life is mirrored in that of Brody. The dog creates the bond. The dialogues flow naturally and the predictable end comes on an optimistic note. Just in the following line, for the sake of consistency, I presume it should read "Amy":
". I was in the car with them, and so was Mia, but we wasn't hurt, 'cept I had a broken arm."
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Yes, you are right, that should be Ami. Thanks for picking up on that. Also for your lovely and generous review and rating. Warmest regards, Marijke
Comment from Rama Rao
An excellent story which shows how children learn from parents what they ought not to do when they become parents. Sometimes when we serve under a good or difficult boss we also learn what to do and what not to do. All that is required are sensitivity and power to observe.
Well scripted as usual.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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An excellent story which shows how children learn from parents what they ought not to do when they become parents. Sometimes when we serve under a good or difficult boss we also learn what to do and what not to do. All that is required are sensitivity and power to observe.
Well scripted as usual.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Ramarao, for those kind words and the empathy behind your words. Yes, so often children believe they are bad if they have been told so. I hope that the belief that this is not true comes through in this story. That, with love, they can overcome. That it can be a win-win situation. Thank you my friend. Warmest regards, Marijke
Comment from fluffnstuff
Oh I can see why this beautifulstory was socomplimented on, Brought a tear to my eyes. It reminded me of the runt ofa litter that for some reason is always the nicest most beautiful pet. They seem to appreciate
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Oh I can see why this beautifulstory was socomplimented on, Brought a tear to my eyes. It reminded me of the runt ofa litter that for some reason is always the nicest most beautiful pet. They seem to appreciate
Comment Written 31-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2010
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Why, thank you so, so, much for your lovely review and your very generous six star rating. I am thrilled - thank you so much. Yes, sometimes it is the runt that is the most beautiful inside. Thank you again. Warmest regards, Marijke
