Flame
Rhyming abcb 8/8/8/8 Quatrains20 total reviews
Comment from SteveY
Yes there are some real joys to be had in the winter as well like the ones you just so perfectly described in your little poem here. Nicely done again.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Yes there are some real joys to be had in the winter as well like the ones you just so perfectly described in your little poem here. Nicely done again.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you, my friend~Debbie
Comment from mountainwriter49
Good Afternoon, Debbie
You've penned a fine poem of reflection and introspection about depression and how it does creep in. I think it is worse in the winter than any other season. I admire your metaphor of the flame in the poem. A good write. Thanks for sharing with us.
Ray
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Good Afternoon, Debbie
You've penned a fine poem of reflection and introspection about depression and how it does creep in. I think it is worse in the winter than any other season. I admire your metaphor of the flame in the poem. A good write. Thanks for sharing with us.
Ray
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Ray. The first 3-4 weeks of November are the worst for me. After Thanksgiving, it seems to improve. Take care and have a wonderful evening~Debbie
Comment from Evelyn Fort Stewart
I'm sure after one has suffered from depression is an awesome feeling to be free of it. This is well-written and does offer hope. God loves you and so do we.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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I'm sure after one has suffered from depression is an awesome feeling to be free of it. This is well-written and does offer hope. God loves you and so do we.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you, my friends. Have a blessed evening~Debbie
Comment from JW
This is a very well written and dramatic poem. But please don't ask me why while I was reading it, I suddenly got a mental message to add electric candles to my shopping list so I could stick them in the windows this Xmas.
Thanks for sharing this. JW
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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This is a very well written and dramatic poem. But please don't ask me why while I was reading it, I suddenly got a mental message to add electric candles to my shopping list so I could stick them in the windows this Xmas.
Thanks for sharing this. JW
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you. Take care, my friend~Debbie
Comment from Meta4ors
Debbie,
Very good at seeing the challenges or otherwise handicaps of people and finding a light, er.."Flame" if you will, for them to find hope and opportunity. Thanks for sharing this poem of merit. I see that you are rather accomplished and if you had a few moments, I would appreciate you checking out this "new" guys poetry. I have 10 items up so far and you are welcome to look at it all, however I thought that I would hand pick a few selections with style diversity. "Maestro" for romance/passion, "Soulmates or Cellmates" struggle for a complicated relationship and "My Feet Hurt" to leave you laughing(I hope). Thanks in advance!
-meta
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Debbie,
Very good at seeing the challenges or otherwise handicaps of people and finding a light, er.."Flame" if you will, for them to find hope and opportunity. Thanks for sharing this poem of merit. I see that you are rather accomplished and if you had a few moments, I would appreciate you checking out this "new" guys poetry. I have 10 items up so far and you are welcome to look at it all, however I thought that I would hand pick a few selections with style diversity. "Maestro" for romance/passion, "Soulmates or Cellmates" struggle for a complicated relationship and "My Feet Hurt" to leave you laughing(I hope). Thanks in advance!
-meta
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Sorry I am so far behind and haven't gotten to them yet. I will take a look. I knew nothing about poetry when I joined Fanstory, and the good people here have taught me so much. Are you new to poetry or have you been writing for a while? I'll get to these, probably in the morning. Best of luck with your writing~Debbie
Comment from michaelcahill
This flows perfectly so the rhymes read quite effectively. A beautiful piece that reflects what many of us feel from time to time. A very uplifting turn that inspires the reader to go and do likewise. As many of these fine pieces that strike you are most welcome. mikey
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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This flows perfectly so the rhymes read quite effectively. A beautiful piece that reflects what many of us feel from time to time. A very uplifting turn that inspires the reader to go and do likewise. As many of these fine pieces that strike you are most welcome. mikey
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you very much. mikey~debbie
Comment from Nosha17
Lovely poem with good imagery and rhyming techniques. You have bared your soul and the light and warmth of love have lifted you up. Commendable writing.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Lovely poem with good imagery and rhyming techniques. You have bared your soul and the light and warmth of love have lifted you up. Commendable writing.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you~Debbie
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Dear Debbie,
Some great word choices and imagery as well as emotion - I could feel your apprehension. Your rhyming seems off in a few lines but overall well penned with a message that has some powerful teeth.
Thanks for sharing.
Maureen
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Dear Debbie,
Some great word choices and imagery as well as emotion - I could feel your apprehension. Your rhyming seems off in a few lines but overall well penned with a message that has some powerful teeth.
Thanks for sharing.
Maureen
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you, Maureen. Some of these are proximate (near) rhymes. I added that in the author notes. Thank you for reminding me to do so~Debbie
Comment from Tessa Kay
Depression is a scourge and far more people suffer from it than is known.
It's nice that you find an outlet in writing.
The rhyming wasn't perfect (soul and grateful and flame and way don't quite gel for me), but the sentiments expressed are lovely.
:) Tessa
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reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Depression is a scourge and far more people suffer from it than is known.
It's nice that you find an outlet in writing.
The rhyming wasn't perfect (soul and grateful and flame and way don't quite gel for me), but the sentiments expressed are lovely.
:) Tessa
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you. Some of these are proximate (near) rhymes. I added that in the author notes. Thank you for reminding me to do so~Debbie
Comment from Gungalo
Glad that a flame has chased away
Darkness from deep within my soul
Life once again is shining bright
Leaving me forever grateful
It's about time tooo Debbie. There is so much to live for to make a happy life. Don't get caught up in the dark.
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reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Glad that a flame has chased away
Darkness from deep within my soul
Life once again is shining bright
Leaving me forever grateful
It's about time tooo Debbie. There is so much to live for to make a happy life. Don't get caught up in the dark.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
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Thank you. Yes, it is best to stay in the light~Debbie
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Smile